


You can kill me through loneliness

by Haineko



Category: The Losers (2010), The Losers - All Media Types
Genre: Ghosts, Minor Character Death, Movie content, Other, Pre-Movie(s), Soulmate concept, Supernatural Elements, some violence and language
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-14
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2018-10-18 20:16:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 50,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10624359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haineko/pseuds/Haineko
Summary: The Losers know Jensen as their happy-go-lucky, loudmouthed and affectionate tech. And most of them are content to subscribe to the notion that what you see is what you get.Except for Cougar, becausethe two of them had an uncanny understanding of each other. They simply clicked in ways that Cougar had never experienced with anyone else. He couldn’t even fully comprehend quite how their understanding worked but itdid.And Jensen was definitively hiding something.





	1. Prolog

**Author's Note:**

> Hi to all who stumbled here.
> 
> This is my first multi-chapter fic that I'm deadset to publish. It's completely outlined and I'm trying to clock at least 500-1000 words a day. So there is a steady progress to it but it's not complete except for the first three chapters. As such I will **update tags** as required.
> 
> Please also note that this only has a soulmate concept and is **not** in fact a Soulmate AU. Sorry to those who were hoping for one.
> 
> Additonally this might turn to a slash story of the Cougar/Jensen kind. Since the end is not yet written I can't say for sure right now. They're best friends and if I think it fits the flow of the story they will get together. But only then.
> 
> I'm not a native speaker so if you spot mistakes please tell me so that I can correct them.
> 
>  
> 
> Disclaimer: Sadly the boys do not belong to me in either verse. Things would have gone differently if they did.

Jake Jensen first joined the Losers as a tech on loan shortly after he finished his special op training. He got assigned to them mid-mission because their intel had not been up-to-date and they’d encountered far stronger security than expected. During that first mission the Losers couldn't help but notice some of his more obvious… quirks right away.

First and foremost that he liked to talk pretty much nonstop, either asking question after question or rambling on and on about every imaginable topic. Getting him to shut up was a challenge and often only an outright order or threat worked and even then it was a short-term solution at best.

Another thing was that Jensen was a quite happy and excitable person who often wore a smile. Coupled with those two traits were his tendency to be easily distracted and his earnest attempts to spread his joy around which often involved casual touches with his chosen victim.

Overall the Losers first impression of Jake Jensen could be pretty much summarized by the words 'class clown', disregarding the fact that they'd all finished not only school but their own black ops training some time ago.

As the mission wore on though new facets revealed themselves. Like the fact that Jensen was not only scarily competent when it came to his tech but also a quite capable soldier regardless of his still pretty green ears when it came to spec-ops. They didn’t know quite how many missions he had participated in – classification and all that – but they knew they were only the third black ops team that got saddled with him.

His competency was a welcome change to the Losers because most of the previous tech-guys that had gotten assigned to them were either able to hack to a satisfying degree or take care of themselves. The few who could do both couldn't stand the crazy that came with being a part of the Losers and their missions.

But Jensen could. Their own various idiosyncrasies might earn them a double-take and a pile of questions but didn't send him screaming for the hills - or begging to never have to meet them again. That had happened once. Word was the guy in question had filled in a request to be reassigned to a complete different base just so that he couldn't run into any of them on accident. They'd had quite a laugh about that one.

But since Jensen took them pretty much in stride they kept him even if he was “supremely annoying” according to Roque.

And the longer they kept him the more he learned their rules and the better he fit in - helped by the fact that the others made room to accommodate him. As a result he was very liberal concerning Cougar’s space and time; often treating the other man like an extension of himself, only limited himself by a few degrees when it came to Pooch, prodded Roque just enough to annoy and anger him a little but was very careful to never (intentionally) tip the SIC over into a real rage and respected Clay’s 'I’m the boss, so while I am approachable I’m also set apart from you'-shtick enough to keep the trouble he caused or got himself into down to the minimum.

All in all they _worked_ as a team so much so that they were more like a family and if Jensen still had some quirks they couldn’t parse, well that was just Jensen being Jensen.

Right?


	2. Interlude I: 4 Years old

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised here's the new chapter which shows a day in child!Jake's life.
> 
> As you may notice, it's titled 'Interlude'. This story will jump between interludes - glimpses into Jensen's past before he joined the military - and chapters, which will take place after he joined the Losers. Chapters will be longer from the looks of it.
> 
> If you feel like I missed any tags please let me know.
> 
> Oh and I used an online dictonary and mean no harm but if I accidently mutilated your language please let me know so I can correct it.
> 
> Not beta-read. If you find any mistakes please take the time to point them out to me.

## Interlude I: 4 Years old

The first time Jake nearly got himself killed was when he was 4 years old. Not that anybody noticed at the time.

He and his family were on a daytrip to some big city and while his dad and his sister were busy doing something _important_ he and his mum were in a park so that he could get rid of some of his seemingly unending energy in order to make the ride home easier on the nerves of his other family members. 

His mum had given him his ball with the firm instructions to not leave the park, to not go with any strangers, to stay at least near the benches where she sat – getting him to stay within her sight was a lost cause and she knew it – so that he could hear her if she were to call for him and to not start any trouble with any of the other kids even if he would probably never see them again after today. 

But just in case that he should get lost or someone would notice him playing around without any adults in the near vicinity his parents had given him a laminated card to wear that stated his name, address and phone number. 

In Jake’s opinion it sucked because he wasn’t even allowed to put it beneath his shirt much less take it off or he wouldn’t get any ice cream and his mum was scary because she would know if he’d done it even if she wasn’t around and all the other kids in the park were making fun of him because of it and didn’t want to play with him because what kind of baby was he that he didn’t even know his own name without a card to tell it to him? 

Angry and a little sad, but not much because the other kids were clearly idiots and he didn’t need them to play with him, he wandered around the park to at last find some space and a wall where he could play with his ball by himself when he suddenly saw a girl sitting all alone at the base of a big tree. 

She had black hair and her skin was a shade of brown he’d never seen before much lighter than the color some of the kids in his day care group who looked more like that icky coffee stuff his dad drank at breakfast or chocolate. 

Jake lost no time in making his way over to her – after all playing ball was much more fun with two players and she was sitting there all alone instead of playing with the other kids so they’d probably been mean to her too. 

“Hi I’m Jake, do you wanna play ball with me?” he asked cheerfully when he reached her even though she hadn’t even looked up at his approach. 

He watched as she looked around wide-eyed before gazing up at him and saying something that sounded like gibberish. 

“Okay, I don’t know what you just said. Do you speak English?” As she stared at him without any hint that she understood him he sighed before repeating hopefully “English?” 

That at least got him a headshake. 

“Okay, okay I can totally work around this. Uhm…” casting his eyes around they caught on some writing on her wrist. Crouching down he slowly took a hold of her hand and tugged it slowly towards him to get a better look at it. 

“Wow your parents must be really annoying if they wrote your name and address on your skin. And I thought mine were bad. 

“Okay so most of this I can’t read no idea what these wriggling lines are supposed to mean but this here, that spells out Pak, no idea why you’d do it in all capitals but hey to each their own, at least that’s what mum always says. 

“So is this your name? I mean it’s not a word I ever heard before so it’s got to be your name, right? Right. 

“I’m Jake. Jake. Here see?” Holding his card out to her he tipped at his name. “Jake.” 

“Jake?” she repeated somewhat hesitantly. 

“Uh-hu,” he confirmed while nodding enthusiastically. “And you’re Pak, right? Pak?” 

“Pak,” she repeated again but this time much more confidently which was all the confirmation he needed. 

“Great! Nice to meet you Pak,” he said bestowing her with a bright grin. “Do you wanna play ball with me?” were the next words to leave his mouth only to realize his mistake almost as fast as her face showed her renewed confusion. 

“Right. Not gonna work. Ummm… Ball,” he extended the ball in her direction, “play,” setting the ball on the ground he pushed it between his hands a few times, “you,” pointing a finger at her, “me?” this time he pointed at himself and did his best to look hopefully at her. 

After a long moment, during which Jake held his breath, she extended a hand and gently pushed the ball, causing it to roll a few inches across the ground. 

“Play,” she said in an almost amazed tone. 

“Awesome,” gushed Jake and took hold of her hand to pull her to her feet and away from the tree. Since saying and simultaneously doing something worked well enough he wasted no time in first kicking the ball for a few strides while asking “kick” before picking it up and throwing it up and down accompanied by the question of “throw”. 

This time there was almost no hesitation before she answered with a small, delicate smile, “Throw.” 

Smiling broadly back he pointed at her “you”, then at the ground “here”, holding up his hand, intensely hoping she knew the signal, “stay” before taking a few cautious steps backwards to create some space between them. 

When a few feet were between them he shot her a quick smile before throwing the ball to her in a way that made it easy to catch it, which she promptly and without problems did. 

They managed to pass the ball back and forth a few times without a hitch slowly graduating to more difficult throws before he fumbled a catch causing the ball to bounce away from them. Both of them immediately set off after it catching up to it at almost the same time and tumbling over each other as a result. 

Lying on the grass Jake started to laugh Pak following after a moment later. 

“Hey Pak,” said Jake after calming down, “How do you say ‘ball’ in your language?” 

With a smile still lurking in the corners of her mouth she simply shook her head to indicate that he’d lost her… again. 

Feeling heat burning in his cheeks Jake thought about how to get his question across in a different way. Finally he settled on pointing at the ball that lay between them accompanied by the words “English: ball” before pointing between her and the ball “Not English?” 

After frowning for a moment she answered, “Ghunda-re.” 

“Gu-what?” 

“Ghunda-re,” she repeated more slowly. 

He needed to repeat it three times before he received a smile and a nod from her for his pronunciation. 

“Man your language is hard,” he groused. “What’s grass, not English?” he asked next while dragging his hand through the green blades. 

Cocking her head she said, “Kabal,” pause, “Zarghoon?” 

Now it was his turn to be stumped. So he did what he did and thought out loud. 

“Okay that’s two words. And it sounded kinda question-y, so you’re not sure what the right answer is? So the real question is – what’s wrong with my question. Or what else I could of asked. Grass… grass… green? Earth? I see. Too many options. But how to make it clear…” looking around his eyes lit up as he spied the trees near them. 

Extending his palm he said, “Stay,” before getting up and racing to the trees to get a leaf. 

Back on the ground with Pak he asked his question by first stroking through the grass again “grass” before pointing between the grass and the leaf “green. Not English?” 

Nodding she repeated his gestures along with first “Kabal” then “Zarghoon.” 

Grinning in triumph because he was good, he set about learning how to pronounce the new words. 

In the same manner he learned that ‘sky’ was ‘asman’ and ‘blue’ was ‘neeli’. His ball provided them with ‘soor’ for ‘red’ and ‘tor’ for ‘black’. 

Since at that point in time his head was buzzing with all the new words they got up and played a few more rounds with the ball. 

They’d just settled down again because Jake was feeling strangely tiered and had managed to work their way through all of their shared words once more when Jake heard his mum calling his name. 

Sitting up he yelled back, “I’m here. Be with you in a moment. Just saying goodbye,” before turning to Pak and saying, “Well you heard my mum, I need to get going. But it was nice meeting you, Pak. Thanks for teaching me your language. Well some words at least. I promise I’ll keep repeating them so I don’t forget. 

Hey, how do you say ‘Goodbye’ in Not-English?” 

“Goodbye?” she echoed uncertainly, making him realize that he had just flooded her with words again without giving her the context to make sense of his question. 

Standing up he pointed at himself “I” before gesturing in the direction his mum was in and finishing with giving Pak a wave “Goodbye.” 

“Ah,” she nodded her understanding, “Khuda pa amani” 

“Well then, Pak,” said Jake, giving her one last wave before grabbing up his ball and trotting over to where his mum stood waiting for him. 

“Hey Jake,” she greeted him and drew him in a hug. 

“Hi Mum,” he replied sacking against her. 

Stroking his hair she commented, “Well you seem tiered. Did you have fun?” 

Perking up a bit he took a deep breath to tell his mum all about Pak and the words he had learned, but she cut him off before he could get started, because she knew she’d be hard pressed to get him to stop again. 

“You can tell me everything in a sec, honey. But first I’d like to know whether you need something to drink and if we need to find a bathroom before meeting up with your dad and sister.” 

“Do you have juice?” 

“I do. Apple or orange?” 

“Hmm, apple.” 

Reaching into her bag she pulled out a juice box and held it out to him. When he just grabbed for it she held it back and asked, “What do you say?” 

“Please?” 

“Here you go.” 

“Thanks,” he replied and struck the straw through the intended place. 

“Want to go over to the benches and sit down while you drink?” she asked next and when he nodded she took his hand and led him over to a free one. There he curled into her side while she placed an arm around him. 

After Jake had finished off his juice and passed the box back to her so she could throw it into the trash can next to her, they got up. Taking hold of his hand again she led the way to the park exit asking him again if he needed to visit a bathroom. 

“Not now. 

“But can I tell you about Pak now?” he practically whined the question. 

“Yes, Jake. You can tell me all about Pak now,” she replied with an indulging smile. 

“Okay, so she was sitting all alone under a tree so I went over but she didn’t speak English but she teached me some of her language and it sounds kind of weird and is hard to say and anyway –” 

Listening to her son chatter away at her side, his hand held firmly in hers so he couldn’t tuck it free with his attempts to gesture, she felt a smile stretch over her face because in this moment she was content with the world. 

If she’d known just how close her son had come to nearly dying she wouldn’t have found this moment quite as enjoyable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's that. 
> 
> Next chapter you get all of the boys and prove that I spent faaar to much time staring at Cougar gifs... well Losers gifs in general but especially Cougar and Jensen ones...


	3. We're leaving without you...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the promised chapter with all of the boys. 
> 
> The mission details are deliberately vague because they aren't important in the greater scheme of things. It's not really important for this chapter since the mission only really kicks off in the next one, but forewarned is forearmed. Let me know how it works out so that I can add some more details if necessary.
> 
> Also I know nothing about military procedures. So if I did do something wrong tell me and I'll correct it.
> 
>  
> 
> ~blah~ is used to indicate transmissions
> 
> for those who read on a mobile device:  
> calmaté = calm down
> 
> All others just hover over the italics.

## We're leaving without you...

It hadn’t been that long ago, that Jensen got assigned to them and yet Cougar couldn’t imagine the Losers without the blond anymore. So it wasn’t all that surprising that they weren’t too fond of their latest mission which required them to separate into two groups. Well one group and Jensen on his own. 

What was a bit surprising was that Jensen was the one who protested the most. 

“I don’t see where your problem is Jensen,” said Roque. “You get to sit in the warm cushy relay-station while we have to slog around for days to get the mission done. If I were you I’d welcome the chance to spend a mission practically doing nothing.” 

Clay and Pooch nodded their agreement to Roque’s position while Cougar held back his own opinion for now. 

Objectively they may have drawn the short straw, but something in Jensen’s behavior made him hesitate with that assessment. Something was off with their tech, but to his own displeasure he couldn’t quite place his finger on what exactly. 

“You might enjoy being confined in a hut on your own for how long was it? Three to five days if there are no or only minor complications and seven to nine if there are major complications? So let’s say six days in a hut with only few distractions and no company other than your own and you all out on a mission? That’s basically a recipe to drive me crazy. 

“Guys, humans are social animals we need social interaction – _I_ need social interaction for my personal wellbeing. I’ll go insane out of boredom and social withdrawal and worry for you. 

“So please just take me with you and make someone else sit around in the cushy shack. Please, Clay?” Here Jensen made his very best puppy-eyes at the boss. Cougar admitted, if only to himself, that he probably couldn’t have refused those pleading eyes. 

Clay was obviously made out of sterner stuff because he shook his head. “This is not a discussion Jensen. You’re our communications officer so you will be in charge of the communication and for that we need you to be at the relay-station. 

“And we will check in regularly so you won’t be cut off from us completely. And if anything happens we will tell you that too. I promise. So you don’t have to worry about us much.” 

Okay, so even the boss wasn’t totally immune to Jensen’s blue blue eyes – and the slight yellow tint of the lenses really should make them at least a little bit more innocuous but somehow they didn’t. 

“Oh great. Five minutes check-ins every morning and evening and if anything happens all I can do is either call for medevac or for reinforcements because I’ll be too far away for anything else. 

“That’s not actually as reassuring a promise as you seem to think it is, Colonel. Actually it’s kinda like if you’re dying from dehydration and all you have to drink is alcohol. It may feel good in the moment but actually it makes everything worse!” 

“You done?” growled Roque, pretty much fed up with the dramatics. Only Cougar wasn’t so sure that it was all for show. 

Sure Jensen liked to grouse and complain about things if he didn’t like them and there was no chance at harm in doing so – if you discounted annoying Roque, because that was always a danger – but right now there was this undercurrent to Jensen’s behavior as if there was an actual danger that the rest of them weren’t aware of. 

A subtle look around showed him that he was the only one who thought that something up. And while it annoyed him because he’d have liked a second opinion on this, he wasn’t all that surprised by it. The others simply took Jensen too much at face value. 

And Jensen certainly didn’t help matters by pretending that what you saw was really all there was and thus all you got. It wasn’t malicious. Cougar knew that. If it were he wouldn’t have allowed Jensen to remain with the Losers. Instead it was simply Jensen’s way of playing his cards close to his chest and doing his best to come across as harmless. Cougar suspected that that particular defense mechanism stemmed from the blond’s home life. It was simply too deeply engraved in his personality to not have dominated his life for years. 

If that was how Jensen was comfortable with playing things Cougar certainly didn’t have the right to tell him to stop. Hell, his own silence worked towards some of the same ends. And he couldn’t deny that he enjoyed the surprised looks of the others when they were blindsided by the tech’s hidden depths. 

But the two of them had an uncanny understanding of each other. They simply clicked in ways that Cougar had never experienced with anyone else. He couldn’t even fully comprehend quite how their understanding worked but it _did_. And it might not enable him to _get_ Jensen and his various reasons for doing certain things in sometimes very certain ways – he doubted anyone could accomplish that particular feat – but it was more than enough to know that right now Jensen was on edge because of this mission, because of the way they were split up in this one. 

He knew that there was no sense in asking Jensen directly. If he did, the man would probably be willing to provide him with dozens of reasons as to why, but none would be the real one. For all the ways they clicked and trusted each other, for all the time they spend together with Jensen practically plastered to him and Cougar allowing this appropriation of his personal space and for all the words Jensen filled the air with they still didn’t really _knew_ each other. 

And whatever had Jensen on edge? Cougar could at least tell that it was something hidden, something personal and therefore something Jensen wouldn’t share with him quite yet unless there was absolutely no other choice. 

Leaving him with no other choice than to keep an even closer eye as usual on Jensen in the hopes that he could pick something up that would shed some light on things in the remaining time they all had together. Which wasn’t all that much unfortunately. Just the rest of today and half a day tomorrow that would be used to pack and prepare as much as possible, then the flight to their drop off point near the relay-station where they would all spent the night before the Losers sans Jensen would set off in order to complete their part of the mission. 

“Okay,” Clay’s voice cut through the argument and made Cougar refocus all of his attention back to what was happening around him. “Jensen, you’re unhappy about the assignment, fine, but unless there is an actual reason that would render you unable to do your job then I don’t want to hear any more complaining about it, clear?” 

Silence was Clay’s only answer. 

“Good. Losers you’re dismissed to attend to your preparations. We’ll regroup at dinner and go over anything that might have popped up or we’ll need to take care of in the morning. Now get going.” 

Standing up Cougar made sure to follow Jensen directly out of the room after giving an acknowledgement to Clay. Out in the corridor he bumped his shoulder into Jensen’s to get his attention and to let him know that he was there. 

“Hey Cougs. So I’m off to the tech department in order to requisition a new field radio for you guys to take with considering our old one died a fiery death. Afterwards I’ll probably be so busy tweaking it and the comm-units as well as trying to verify the information we’ve been given that I’ll be too busy to actually think about my enforced vacation, as Roque called it, and to worry about what I’ll actually do with all that horrible free time. 

“I mean don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy free time when we can get it because it gives me time to do stuff for myself instead of for the military but seeing as this is happening during a mission my options for entertainment are sorely limited so you better be prepared to at least entertain me a bit during the check-ins because otherwise my brain will turn to mush because of severe understimulation which will cause it to try and create its own stimulation which doesn’t bode well for my sanity. 

“And yeah I know my sanity is in question often enough but this would make it worse, because I really don’t fare well when I’m forced to spend too much time in my own company. Just ask my sister. The stories she could tell you – wait actually _don’t_ ask my sister because I’d really prefer it if those stories would never be brought up again. Not that I have too much hope of that happening. I mean she’s my sister, annoying and embarrassing me are part of her job description according to her and she’s kind of right in that, but still! 

“Anyways, I need to go that ways now and you don’t, so I’ll see you later.” 

Placing a hand on Jensen’s arm before he could walk of he asked, “Anything I can do?” 

The offer earned him a smile and a head tilt that meant Jensen was going over both their respective pre-mission to-do lists and checking for overlappings. 

“Actually, yeah. You’re going to do a wash, right? If you have some space left I’ve got some things in the hamper. I mean I should have enough clothing to get through the mission without problem but they don’t need to stink the place up either. 

So yeah that’d be great.” 

Cougar tilted his head in acquiescence and lifted his hand of Jensen’s arm. 

“Great. Thanks. I’ll see you later then, Cougs. Toodles.” 

Watching Jensen leave Cougar couldn’t stop the small smile tucking at the edges of his mouth. He was pretty sure that there was no other soldier in the military who would use the word ‘toodles’ while on base and inside of an official building. 

Turning away he set out to the Loser’s on base housing in order to get his wash started. 

On the way and during the well known task he had more than enough time to contemplate all that Jensen had said. 

Jensen’s main problem with this mission honestly seemed to be rooted in the fact that he had to spend a few days on his own while his only job was to maintain communication and to keep an eye out for surprises. 

Which, given that Jensen usually occupied himself with at least two or three things or something so complex that anyone else would be overwhelmed, would leave him pretty bored when only doing monitoring. The Losers were by now very aware of the dangers a bored Jensen could represent and did their best to not let such a thing occur for more than five minutes at a time during down time. 

While on a mission Jensen usually managed. Their last mission had been a hurry-up-and-wait kind of deal which had resulted in Jensen introducing them to his skills in repurposing all kinds of supplies in order to create rather astonishing puppets and then playing out various scenarios with them. 

However that wouldn’t work as a distraction if he had to wait for days for them to come back. Still Cougar had confidence in Jensen’s ability to entertain himself without endangering them or the mission. 

So if that wasn’t the problem that only left the fact that he would be alone. And while Jensen was a social person who truly enjoyed interacting with others through all possible means there had been enough incidents of Jensen losing himself in some coding or hacking or game during which they hadn’t caught more than glimpses of him for days. Except for Cougar himself because he and Jensen shared a room. But even if he was in the same room of Jensen he usually got ignored. 

Thinking those incidents over he compared them to each other and to the mission parameters to see if there were any similarities, patterns or anything that would help him to gain an understanding about what was going on. 

And in the end something did stand out. For the most part Jensen’s coding/hacking/gaming sprees didn’t last longer than three days at most but there had been one which had lasted five days and one which had even spanned eight days. In both cases Jensen had come out of their room after about three days to spend some time with them simply socializing before either going to sleep right then and there – preferably leaning onto either Cougar himself or Pooch since Clay and Roque didn’t really tolerate that particularly habit outside of the field – or if it was evening and they all went to bed he would spend some more time with them in the morning before going back to his computers. 

Jensen himself had used the words ‘social withdrawal’ and said that he needed social interaction for his own wellbeing. So were three to four days the longest Jensen felt comfortable to spend on his own? There was no denying that the tech was an extrovert and thrived in social situations but there shouldn’t actually be any consequences in spending more time alone. 

Except maybe emotional ones. 

Cougar didn’t know enough about Jensen to be able to say if he was at a high risk when it came to depressions or similar afflictions. He may be the medic of the team and as such Clay had given him an overview of Jensen’s past injuries but nothing psychological. 

The actual question was what could Cougar do about it? 

They were going to go on the mission whether he said anything or not. He could of course bring his worry to Clay’s attention but as long as _Jensen_ didn’t say anything Clay wouldn’t call the mission off. And since Jensen had had his chance and hadn’t taken it that was a dead end. 

What he could do was to a) use the daily check-ins to try and monitor Jensen’s emotional state and b) try to push the pace of the mission as much as he safely could. 

Feeling calmer now that he had a plan of action Cougar was able to fully relax into his pre-mission weapon check and cleaning that he’d started with after loading his wash. 

He had his rifle in pieces in front of him when Jensen came in carrying the field radio he’d organized for them. 

“Hello again Cougar. So what do you think? Radio or information first?” was the greeting he received. 

“Information.” 

“You, my feline friend, are probably right. What am I saying? There is no probably here. You are of course right. Now that I think about it, I don’t think you’ve ever been wrong about anything since we’ve met. 

“Which is kind of scary and cool now that I think about it. Is it because you don’t say all that much and only if you’re certain that you’re right? I bet it is that way. It would be suitable sneaky for you. 

“I just know that I couldn’t manage. I like speculating too much to give it up and you can never be sure if you’re right or wrong when you’re speculating. 

“Also try and error are like the foundation of coding and where would I be if I gave up coding? I probably wouldn’t even recognize myself anymore, because all coded things kind of just speak to me and it is ever so satisfying to make them my bitch, if you know what I mean. 

“It would be like you laying down your rifle, just not conceivable, or can you see yourself not making super duper shots?” 

Taking the chance the question offered him he gave a small smile and headshake before reminding the tech, “Jensen, information.” 

“Oh right! I was going to do that. 

“Hey, would you mind doing the big guns first so that I can set up shop here too later? Because, as you know, the light is better in here than in our room.” 

He signaled his agreement before slightly tilting his head in the direction of their room. 

“I’m going, I’m going. Jeez no reason to nag,” setting the radio down Jensen turned to go, all the while mumbling under his breath. “I really don’t know why the others seem to think that you’re aloof. You’re sometimes just as bad as my sister with your nagging. You’re not even hiding –” was all Cougar could understand before Jensen moved so far away for the mumbling to become too indistinct to make out words. And only the closing of the room’s door cut it off completely. 

Amused Cougar returned his attention to his rifle. His life had certainly gotten quite a bit more amusing since Jensen joined the Losers. And better if he was honest with himself. 

He spend the next few hours in silence and with the exemption of the short break he took to move his clothes into the dryer completely focused on taking care of the Losers’ guns. As a result there was enough room on the table for Jensen to open up the field radio and tinker around with its innards when the tech emerged from their room. 

Their comfortable companionship came to an end when it was dinnertime and they all convened in the kitchen to eat and go over the mission. 

“Okay, so what do we have?” asked Clay. 

To the surprise of no one Jensen was the first to speak up. 

“Okay, so the information checks out. The satellite photos we’ve been given match up with what I could access. But since mine have better resolution I’ve uploaded both sets on this tablet here, which I’ll allow you take with you since it now also contains detailed maps of the surrounding area. 

“Oh and Pooch,” here he turned the screen so that the man in question could look at it easily, “Here, I have marked spots where you may be able to scrounge up some transport. 

“Apart from that I’m reinforcing the encryption of the field radio right now and next I’ll make it so that you can use your comm-units to remote access it if you have to. 

“Can’t really do anything about the weigh so I hope for your sake you find a vehicle.” 

“Okay. 

"Pooch what do you have?”

“Well I stocked up my kit to heighten the chances of being capable to get any vehicle up and running. I’ve also gone over a few maps to plot possible routes and I’ll cross-check them with Jensen’s maps. 

“Otherwise I looked up the nearest base and an evac can reach the relay-station in about forty minutes so if we’re coming back hot for some reason we can calculate when Jensen needs to call it in. 

“Also I’ve looked for possible landing spaces in case we need medevac asap and I’ll put them in the tablet.” 

"Good. 

“Cougar?” 

“Guns okay. Medical tomorrow.” 

“Right. 

“Roque?” 

“I picked up enough MREs for all of us and will get the needed explosives tomorrow morning so that I have enough time to check them over before packing them up. 

“Got a few ideas about distribution already but I want to see the compound first before I make any calls.” 

“Good. 

“Pick up is tomorrow 1100, so I want you all packed and ready at 1045 at the latest. We’ll be driven to an airfield where we’ll board a plane and later switch to a helicopter which will drop us off about a mile from the relay-station at around 1830 local time. 

“We’ll hike to the station and set up camp there for the night. It’ll be a bit of a squeeze but we’re all used to that. 

“Jensen will stay there and the rest of us will set off at 0600 hours when we’ll have enough light to see where we’re setting our feet. We’ll make our way to the compound, check it out, blow it up and return to the relay-station. 

“For now the weather forecast says no rain but there might be some fog. Jensen will keep us up to date during the two check-ins, one which will be at about 1130 local time and the other in the evenings after setting up camp at about 1900. 

“Jensen, we’re the ones to initiate those check-ins. You may only contact us if we’ve missed a check-in by two hours or the information is of utmost importance like a change of orders or weather conditions. 

“Anybody got any questions?” 

When no one asked one Clay dismissed them. 

The first thing they all did was going over the MREs to pick out the ones they preferred while still acquiring at least some different flavors for variety. Claimed MREs were either directly stored in their packs or laid down on their bunks depending on how far they were in their packing process. 

Afterwards they spread out with everybody doing their own thing. Jensen went back to the field radio but not before Pooch had made the tech give him an explanation about the tablet so he could handle it without problems. Pooch had then retreated to the couch with it. 

Clay had retreated into his office, probably to complete some last minute paperwork, while Roque was occupying the kitchen table with maps he was looking over. 

Cougar collected everybody’s first aid kit before joining Jensen at the living room table again to go over each’s content checking for missing items, the state of the sealing as well as expiration dates. If he found or didn’t find something he noted down which item he would need to get and for whose kit it was. 

He’d long since learned to tailor the kits towards their owner’s needs. For example Jensen and Pooch, who had the highest risks of acquiring small cuts to their fingers but needed to keep their dexterity, had more small band-aids with longer tape sections that could be easily but securely wrapped around fingers. Roque on the other hand had additional suture threat in his because his stitches were second only to Cougar’s. 

After his list was completed he collected his clothing form the dryer and retired to the room he shared with Jensen. There he first sorted out which garments belonged to him and which to the blond, then proceeded to fold all of them and put them away. 

From his half of the wardrobe he pulled enough socks and undergarments out to last him through ten days because there were few things as annoying and uncomfortable as running out of dry and clean socks and underwear. 

Picking out a few t-shirts, shirts and two pants – one being a pair of jeans so that they had a chance of blending in with civilians if necessary. It shouldn’t be necessary on this mission but you never knew what could go wrong – he stowed them and his MREs in his pack. Deciding that he had more than enough time to finish packing tomorrow Cougar picked up his sleeping pants and made his way to the bathroom. After all tonight was the last night he would be able to sleep through without having a guard shift. 

A quick shower later he crawled beneath his blanket and was asleep within minutes. 

* * *

The next morning Cougar woke at 5:30 as usual. 

A quick glance to the other bed showed him Jensen conked out in his bed with the blanket half kicked-off. Looking closer he managed to make out the shapes of the MRE-boxes on the floor at the food end of the blond’s bed. Obviously he’d just dumped them off the bed when he came in. At least he’d done it quietly enough not to wake Cougar. 

Pulling on a shirt Cougar picked his way through the dim room until he could slip through the door. The house was quiet but that was normal. Cougar was always the first one awake at least if no one had suffered a nightmare and subsequently fled their bed. 

His bare feet made no sound as he padded through the living room where he saw the now closed up field radio and into the kitchen to start the coffeemaker and make breakfast. Since they were leaving for a mission it was important to use up their perishables or their return wouldn’t be a happy one. The one time they had forgotten it had taken them nearly a week to get the stink out of the kitchen. No one wanted a repeat of that. 

Looking at what he needed to work with he finally settled on making waffles with fruit as a side as well as scrambled eggs with cheese and vegetables, bacon and sausages. There was also toast in the refrigerator for those who wanted it. 

Decision made he poured himself a cup of coffee to sip throughout his preparations and started to cut up the vegetables and cheese. Followed by mixing the batter and heating up the waffle iron as well as the skillet. 

By the time the second waffle was nearly done and the bacon was slowly turning crispy he could hear someone, probably Roque if the others were sticking to their routines, moving around upstairs. 

He was proven right when the SIC entered the kitchen not even ten minutes later, making straight for the pot of coffee and then taking a seat at the table. 

Cougar gave him enough time to drink half his cup before placing the fruit, a bowl, a chopping board and a knife in front of him. 

Turning back to the stove he replaced the bacon with the sausages, poured fresh batter into the iron and started to scramble the eggs. Behind him he could hear Roque grumble to himself but Cougar wasn’t worried that the fruits wouldn’t get chopped. After all whoever had helped with the preparation of breakfast was exempt from the clean up and since they wouldn’t start the dish washer today cutting up a few fruit was definitely preferably to washing the dishes by hand. 

Since neither of them was inclined to chatter they worked in silence until everything was prepared and the table set at which point Pooch showed up. 

“Moring Cougs, Roque,” he greeted them around a yawn. “Anything left to do?” 

Inclining his head in greeting he replied, “No. Sit.” 

“Seems like you’ll be stuck doing dishes,” tacked Roque on with some schadenfreude evident in his voice. 

“Damn. And here I’d hoped that I could at least set the table.” 

“Should’ve gotten up earlier then.” 

“Just because you and Cougar over there like to be up and about before the sun, doesn’t mean that the rest of us are inclined to do the same,” grumbled Pooch while taking his first gulp of coffee. 

Heavy steps announced the arrival of Clay who never seemed to be capable of fully waking up without at least two cups of Joe while on base. Knowing this Cougar poured one and held it out towards his commanding officer who took it with a grunt before collapsing into a chair. 

“Start,” he told the others as he turned to leave the kitchen and to fetch their last member. 

Jensen was unsurprisingly still sprawled out on his bed and fast asleep. But then again who knew when the tech had actually gone to bed? And even if that had been only a few hours ago he could sleep further on the way to the relay-station. 

“Jensen,” Cougar called softly, gently nudging one bare shoulder. “Wake up. Breakfast is ready.” 

“Cougs…?” came the mumbled reply. 

“Sí. Get up.” 

“Do I hav’ta?” was asked next but at the same time Jensen started to lever himself up and reached for his glasses. 

“There are waffles and coffee.” 

“Well, can’t say no to that, can I?” and with these words Jensen was now official awake and ready to tackle the day… well the next few hours at least mused Cougar to himself as he caught sight of the shadows beneath those blue eyes. 

With a small smile Cougar watched as Jensen pulled a t-shirt over his head, mussing up his hair even more, making him look soft-edged and young. Banishing that thought with a small head shake he followed the blond back to the kitchen. 

“Good morning, my fellow people! How are you on this fine day?” greeted Jensen while plopping into a chair and starting to serve himself some waffles. Without a word Cougar added fruit to Jensen’s plate which earned him a small pout. 

“Not nearly as awake as you are. I still don’t get how you do that man, and without coffee to boot,” replied Pooch after taking a fortifying sip of said beverage. 

Roque didn’t even bother with a reply and just kept on eating while Clay grumbled something back. 

“It’s not my fault if my brain has a much shorter boot-up time than yours and your caffeine addiction is so much worse.” 

“Oh come on! It’s bad enough that you make your computer stuff sound like people, there is no need to make us sound like computer stuff, especially when it’s still this early,” complained Pooch, causing all of them except Jensen to shudder as they recalled the first time they had heard the tech get _friendly_ with a system. 

“Now _that_ was a reminder I could have gone without,” commented Roque darkly. 

“We’re finishing breakfast in silence, understood?” growled Clay. 

“But –” 

“No buts, Jensen. We clear?” 

“Yes sir.” 

Silence of course was relative, because although there were no words spoken there were the sounds of cutlery scraping over plates, the clinks of cups being sat down, the occasional scrape of a chair over the floor as someone got up and sat down again and the constant noise of Jensen fidgeting. 

It was something Cougar had noticed before. Jensen seemed to be unable to hold still if he had to be silent unless his attention was fully captured by something or it was of the utmost importance that they remained unnoticed. It was almost like he needed to expel the energy he couldn’t use up through talking by moving around. 

Two times Cougar also caught him opening his mouth to start saying something and each time he gave him a soft nudge under the table to remind him to keep quiet. After all since they still had hours until they needed to leave and Clay wouldn’t be above assigning Jensen some CAPE. 

In the end they managed to finish breakfast without further incidents and without any leftovers. 

“Alright. Who’s doing the dishes besides Jensen?” asked Clay breaking the silence. 

“Me,” admitted Pooch before adding, “and there is no need to look so damn smug about it, Roque.” 

“Hey, you could have gotten up earlier. 

“And anyway Cougar and I still need to get some things ready before we can leave.” 

“Then get to it. I’ll be in my office if anybody needs me.” With these words Clay ended their morning and left the kitchen. 

“Meet you in 15 out front?” asked Roque while standing up. 

With a nod in the direction of the SIC Cougar too left the kitchen. 

After changing his clothing, a stop in the bathroom and a quick shave later Cougar stood outside their housing with his hat firmly in place and his item list tucked away in a pocket. 

Getting the things he wanted went without a hitch and after he made short work of first stocking the medical kits up and then distributing them back to their owners. 

Next Cougar continued packing, finishing with exchanging his leather cowboy hat for his mission hat in the special compartment that he’d added to his pack. It stopped whichever hat was stored within from getting too squished and the wrinkles it couldn’t prevent could usually be removed with some TLC. 

He knew that Jensen differentiated them by calling the mission hat, which was made out of a sturdy and stiff, canvas-like fabric, ‘hat’ and the cowboy hat ‘Hat’ or occasionally even ‘The Hat’. Cougar had even caught Pooch doing the same. 

He still remembered fondly how Jensen had gushed over it once he’d pulled it out after their first mission was finished and the chances for it to get ripped, perforated, lost, destroyed or anything else that could easily occur in the field were back to normal levels. Delighted by the sight of an honest-to-god cowboy hat perched on Cougar’s head Jensen had assured him that the Hat totally upped his BAMF-level to astronomical heights and that he should always wear it because it also looked way cooler. 

Cougar simply thought that Jensen liked how light could make the leather shimmer and shine, because the tech was definitively afflicted with a strong case of ‘OHHH-Shiny’ and that if he wasn’t so surprisingly good with personal boundaries he would have tried to steal it at least once by now. 

With the hats switched out and his pack securely closed, Cougar was left with nothing to do but cool his heels until it was time to leave. Not that he had any problems with sitting silently in the living room and watching the others from beneath the brim of his hat. 

At 1045 they were all ready to go with their gear next to them. 

“Good,” said Clay after taking one long look at them. “Let’s get going, Losers.” 

And with that they all shouldered their things and trooped out of the door which Clay locked up. 

“Man I hate not getting to drive myself, because instead of just loading up and being able to just go you get to stand around and since we’ve got Roque with us we don’t even look pretty,” complained Pooch. 

“Ahh, you think I’m pretty! Thanks Pooch,” replied Jensen in an exuberant voice. 

“That’s nothing to be happy about, Jensen. And certainly nothing you should thank someone for. Or something you should strive for and that goes for both of you,” growled Roque. 

“Oh come on, don’t be like that, Roque. Don’t let society do the thinking for you when it comes to things you should and shouldn’t strive for. 

“And I assure you I’m more than comfortable enough in my manhood to be able to accept ‘pretty’ as a compliment. So if Pooch or anyone else wants to call me pretty I’m game.” 

“That’s only because you aren’t likely to get any other compliments when it comes to your looks. In fact ‘dorkface’ is a much more apt description.” 

“Hey, no need to hate my style. After all we’re not calling you ‘scarface’ either.” 

“Wouldn’t be a good idea or I might just gift you with a matching one.” 

“Okay, that’s enough. Roque you know no threats like that out in the open; we don’t need someone getting the wrong impression here. 

“And Jensen, wipe that smile of your face. Can you at least act somewhat professional while we’re still on base? All of you?” asked Clay exasperated. 

“Sure thing, Bossman,” answered Jensen cheerfully. 

“You got it,” chimed Pooch in. 

“Since you asked so nicely, Clay,” added Roque with a smirk. 

Cougar limited himself to a serious nod. His face was carefully neutral. 

Clay heaved a deep sigh. 

Just then a car pulled into their street and they all straightened their postures. After all they had agreed to give it at least some effort. 

“Transport for Colonel Clay and unit,” reported the driver. 

“That’s us. Get loaded up, Losers,” commanded Clay and they made quick work of stowing their gear and taking seats. Clay took shotgun, Roque and Pooch shared one bench and Jensen and Cougar took the rear bench. 

In contrast to Pooch and Roque who had each settled at one end of their bench, Jensen had sat down directly next to Cougar, pressing their thighs together. 

“Will you sleep in the car?” Cougar asked, because if there was enough space Jensen usually only sat this close if he wanted to sleep or if something had shook him up. 

“Nah, I think I’ll wait until we’re on the plane. Hopefully that’ll be the smoother ride or at the very least less stop and go and I’m not really tired yet anyway. I mean I can feel the wariness tucking at me because I only slept for like three hours but that field radio was being a total bitch and I have no idea who was responsible for it before we got it but whoever it was they certainly didn’t open it up or if they did, they didn’t care to maintain it because some of the wires I found were in urgent need of replacement. 

“Okay, there was a chance they’d hold for the duration of the mission but since I’m not going with you, you’d most certainly have lacked the materials to make repairs if it did give out for some reason or another. 

“And then you would be unable to contact me and I unable to contact you so I would call for reinforcements and the whole thing would be just such an embarrassment for all of us and who wants that?” 

As Jensen continued his rant, this time about the team’s reputation, Cougar blocked him out so that he was only listening with half an ear. It was something he, and probably the other Losers too, had perfected to an art form. 

Paying Jensen’s babble your full attention all the time was just impossible. The amount of knowledge the younger man had stored in his brain never failed to amaze Cougar and he had no problem with admitting that intellectually he couldn’t keep up with his friend. If he tried he would just end up with a headache caused by overload – that fact he knew from experience. 

So now he just listened enough to know what Jensen was talking about, sift through it in case there were some interesting morsels hidden away and able to recognize and tune back in if anything important came up. 

He also made sure to periodically let Jensen know that he was still listening in or if necessary keep his end of the conversation up. 

Not that that was actually as much of a hassle as it usual was if he absolutely had to talk to people, because Jensen picked up his nonverbal clues with a frankly astonishing but welcome ease. 

A slight increase in the pressure against his thigh made him turn and tilt his head slightly. His actions earned him a bright grin causing Cougar to reflect on how easy it was to please Jensen by just giving him some attention. 

Now that he thought of it this virtual craving for attention might also factor into Jensen’s distaste for being left behind. 

Admittedly there was a slight chance that he was overthinking things and Jensen simply resented being made to stay behind because he liked to _know_ things when he wanted to know them or was at the very least able to find out about the things he wanted to know about. But in staying at the relay-station he would be totally dependent on their reports for information regarding the team. 

Their arrival at the airfield caused him to cut his thoughts short as they got out of the car grabbed their gear and headed to the already waiting plane. 

After they’d boarded and taken their seats Cougar nudged Jensen and held his hand out. 

“Nag, nag, nag,” murmured Jensen but handed his glasses over without making a fuss. And as soon as they had reached their intended altitude he slouched down in his seat so he could rest his head against Cougar’s shoulder. Ten minutes later he was fast asleep. 

“How much sleep did he get last night?” asked Clay quietly. 

“About three hours,” replied Cougar unsurprised that Clay hadn’t heard Jensen in the car, because the blond had long since figured out just how to pitch his voice so that it didn’t carry too far. In fact he wasn’t even sure if Pooch or Roque had been able to understand him, at least not without actively trying. 

“Alright, let him sleep through the plane ride if he wants to. But he’s staying awake afterwards. Otherwise he’ll be too keyed up in the evening.” 

After that degree was passed they mostly sunk into silence. Clay and Cougar simply rested in their seats while Roque and Pooch plotted out a few routes for them to take. They marked them on the tablet before passing it first to Clay and then to Cougar to look over and memorize. 

Afterwards Roque played around with one of his knifes and Pooch dealt himself some solitaire. The occasional comment was thrown around but with Jensen asleep no one felt the need to get any kind of conversation started. And the near silence was comfortable in its own way. 

Hours later, when their pilot announced that they would reach their goal shortly, Cougar shook Jensen awake. Who proceeded to yawn and rub at his eyes in a way that was decisively at odds with his uniform. 

“Jesus, Jensen. If you look any younger we’d get in trouble for kidnapping a minor,” commented Roque. 

“You’re just jealous of my youthful looks and my ability to look pretty,” shot Jensen back and batted his eyes at the SIC. 

“Okay, we’re not heating that topic back up. 

“We’ll be landing shortly and once our feet are on the ground we’ll have some time to move around, eat something and use a toilet. So if one of you feels like he needs to do some push-ups, feel free. And if I think some of you need to get rid of some energy there will be enough time for that as well.” As he said that last sentence Clay looked first at Jensen and then at Roque, making his meaning clear. 

The landing and their break went off without a hitch and all of them took the chance to stretch their muscles. The food was nothing to write home about but then, army-provided food very rarely was and they were all used to it by now. 

The helicopter that would take them further was on the smaller side and since Clay and Roque claimed one bench for themselves that left Pooch, Jensen and Cougar to share the other one. Since he would be sitting in the middle – sometimes being the slightest and most patient, when it came to Jensen and his antics, on the team had its disadvantages – his choices amounted to either sit boxed in between Pooch and Jensen with next to no room at all or spend the flight tucked under Jensen’s arm and into his side with at least some extra limb room. And if he happened to find the random patterns that Jensen was wont to trace onto his shoulder soothing? Well that was no one’s business but his own. 

Thankfully this last flight wasn’t too long and so they were soon able to leave the cramped conditions behind them. 

Once they all had their feet back on the ground and the helicopter was gone again, Clay send Roque and Cougar out to check the surrounding and then scout ahead to the relay-station and clear it. 

When the others joined them there Jensen headed straight for the electrical equipment, drawn to it like a moth to a flame and without sparing the rest of the hut a single glance. 

Clay and Pooch on the other hand did the sensible thing by first checking their new abode out and then claiming spots to later set out their sleeping rolls. 

“So we should be good,” announced Jensen after a few minutes of checking the equipment. “But I want to do a quick field check anyway, especially of the patch through. Which reminds me –” going to his pack he pulled out the case that housed their comm-units during transport, “press the button three times in short order and it should patch you through to me here, press it three times again to sever the connection. 

“But this is for emergencies only as unfortunately it’s failure-prone, has a bit of lag time and uses up a lot of energy. 

“Anyways, who’s willing to take a walk?” 

“I say, Pooch and Cougar go,” said Roque and when Clay nodded his consent Pooch groaned but picked up the field radio while Cougar took the box with the comm-units and his rifle. 

“How far out do we need to go?” 

“Half a mile should do it. 

“Now that I think of it, it would have been easier if someone had stayed back at the landing spot.” 

“And now we know why Roque is responsible for tactics and not you. 

“We’ll head back in that direction though because we know that’s at least somewhat secure. That okay?” checked Pooch and got approving nods from both Clay and Roque. “Well then, we’re off. Come on, Cougar.” 

With a nod to the others Cougar followed the bald man out of the door and back the way they’d just come. 

“You gonna stick to my side, or slink away?” 

“For now, I’ll stay,” replied Cougar after a short contemplation. He would stay with Pooch until the other had set up and then break away to make sure the surrounding was at least somewhat secure. 

They spend the rest of the walk in easy silence. 

Once they covered the required distance and found a good spot for Pooch to set up Cougar told him, “Give me five,” and started to leave after setting the comms down. 

“Hey wait, take one of these with you. That way I can just tell when it’s time for you to reappear,” said Pooch and held one of the units out to Cougar, who took it with a slight eye roll before turning to sweep their surroundings. 

Making sure that the comm was turned on he clipped in to his belt and tucked the earpiece in place. 

Dust was falling but there was still enough light to see by. 

After the requested five minutes were over Pooch contacted him via the comm. 

~So, is the coast clear?~ 

“Sí” 

~Okay, I’ll contact Jensen first through the field radio and then try to initiate the patch-through with all the units I have here. You’ll need to try it after too, just so that we’re sure it works with all of them. 

~If everything works out fine come back here after you finish your transmission and we’ll head back together. Sounds good?~ 

This time he didn’t bother with a verbal answer and just tapped the micro twice to signal his agreement. 

Over the next few minutes Cougar could listen to first Pooch mumbling to himself and then to him speaking with presumably Jensen – the replies were to quiet for him to identify the speaker or discern what was being said. 

~Well, that were the four units I have with me. Cougs you’re up.~ 

Obligatory Cougar pressed the button on his comm three times. 

~Yo Cougar, you there? 

~If yes, do you hear me clearly? Because Pooch said you were farther away from the field radio and while it shouldn’t have an effect on the quality as long as you stay within range, it’d be nice to know for sure, so please answer with more than just one word.~ 

“I can hear you clearly,” he said in a deadpan voice to show just how tedious he found the request to be. 

~Poor Kitty-cat, are you being forced to use your words by the big bad hacker? But don’t worry, you too were crystal clear so I won’t ask you to tax your daily word count any further on my behalf. 

~Thanks for doing this guys and you can heed back whenever you feel like it.~ 

~We’re coming back now, and there better be food waiting for us or next time you can find someone else next time you need to do something like this,~ announced Pooch, causing Cougar to start back to where he’d left the other man but not before ending the patch-through. 

There _was_ food ready for them once they’d made their way back to the relay-station handed to them by a smiling Jensen. 

“Okay, although we should be safe enough for the night, I still want somebody to be awake at all times. 

“First and last watch each take one and a half hours, the three in between one each. Jensen since you won’t be marching tomorrow you’ll take the middle shift. I’ll take the first one. And I don’t care how you split up the rest between you,” declared Clay after they’d finished eating. 

“Last,” claimed Cougar immediately. 

“I don’t really care. Do you have any preferences, Roque?” 

“I’ll take the one after Clay,” answered the SIC. 

“Fine by me. 

“Since it’s just about 9 p.m. who’s up for a few games?” asked Pooch already pulling the deck out of his pack. 

And that was indeed how they spend the evening until Clay announced that it was time to get some shut eye which caused them to finish their last game, make use of the facilities and spread out their bed rolls. Of course that was when Jensen noticed that he had never claimed a space for himself. 

In the end he simply squished himself in next to Cougar with a cheeky grin who rolled his eyes in response before turning on his side and dropping off to sleep. 

* * *

Cougar was more awake than asleep when Pooch crouched down next to him and proceeded to shake his shoulder slightly. 

Sitting up he gestured for the bald man to return to his own bed roll before extracting himself from his and taking up post by the window where some NVG were resting. Putting them on he settled down for his shift, the known sounds of his sleeping team members a soothing background. 

Losing himself somewhat in the stillness and the waiting it was only the sounds of someone stirring behind him that caused him to return his attention to the inside of the hut. A quick look at his watch told him that it was shortly before 5 a.m. This meant he had half an hour left on the clock before he was supposed to wake everyone up so that they could set out at 0600 as planned. 

Muffled footsteps made him turn around slightly to see Roque shuffling over to the small counter where a coffee maker stood. Apparently the SIC was moving the wake-up-call forwards, since he immediately prepped and started the machine. 

It didn’t take more than five minutes before the first grumblings could be heard and after five more everyone was up and about albeit grudgingly in some cases. 

During breakfast Jensen sat close – their thighs pressed together and shoulders constantly brushing each other. And when Cougar raised an inquisitive eyebrow all he got in return was a tight smile and subtle headshake which did next to nothing to reassure him. 

Throughout the morning he watched Jensen and the more he watched the more worried he became. They had long since established various patterns in order to get ready for various situations with the utmost efficacy and since Jensen was staying back here, and therefore didn’t need to get ready to set out, he should be staying on the outskirts - ready to help if needed but not inserting himself into the proceedings otherwise. 

Instead he kept moving in and out – not hindering, not really at least and there would’ve been hell to pay if he did, just flitting in and out and around each of them, accompanying them for a few steps before switching to someone else and repeating it over and over again. And each and every time he would seek out physical contact. 

Now it was no secret that Jensen liked to touch people and be touched by them in return. Considering that it was more often than not his own personal space that got invaded Cougar was very much aware of this fact. But this behavior Jensen was displaying right now? That was new. 

This, combined with everything else he’d already observed since the mission briefing, only served to set his teeth further on edge. Additionally he still had no clue to what exactly was going on with Jensen. 

All in all, he felt more and more helpless as the time to depart drew nearer and nearer and he had yet to come up with anything but ‘return to Jensen as fast as possible’ and ‘use the check-ins to gauge Jensen’s wellbeing’. 

“What has your pack done to you that you’re staring at it like that?” 

The amused question pulled him from his thoughts and when he refocused on the hut he was indeed looking at his fully packed gear – thank Dios for muscle memory and routine. 

Glancing up he was unsurprised to find Jensen standing next to him with an amused smile gracing his features and a hand outstretched. Taking a hold of the hand he was easily pulled up from his crouch. 

“You know, it’s really weird watching you all get ready to go and not doing the same. Also it’s kind of an absurd reversal of how things went for me before I joined up with you guys, because usually no squad or team kept me longer than a mission or two before getting fed up with me and making me move on which meant I had to pack my bags and leave while they stayed behind. And I’m not really sure how I feel about this role-reversal. 

“Even if it isn’t really one. I mean those teams were usually glad to see me go and I can honestly say that I don’t particularly miss them either. Although occasionally there were some individuals who weren’t all that bad. 

“But back to the point, which is me staying and you going and me being somewhat unhappy about it because I really like you, all of you to varying degrees, and I’ll probably miss you if you take too long, you first and foremost of course because you’re my best friend but I think eventually I’d even miss Roque and Clay. I’m not actually sure who I’d miss first or more with those two though. “ 

Cougar used Jensen taking a deep breath to continue as a chance to squeeze the hand that rested lightly on his forearm, it had slid there after he’d released it, and injected, “Jensen, _cálmate_.” 

Jensen took a deep breath in response but there was still worry etched into his brow which prompted him to continue in a soft voice. 

“We will be fine. And we will come back for you. There is no need to worry.” 

“I’ll give you the first two but not the last because you’re worrying too so obviously there is something to worry about.” 

Cougar simply raised one eyebrow and gave Jensen a pointed stare. 

“Me? Really Coug? 

“Okay, so I’m somewhat unhappy about staying here, as we’ve already established, but I’ll be loads safer than you.” Then Jensen narrowed his eyes contemplatively. “Or are you worried about what I might instigate? 

“Either way, I assure you there are limits to the amount of trouble that can happen to me or that I can get into while basically being trapped in a shed, so wipe that smirk of your face!” 

He wasn’t smirking – at least not outwardly. 

“Speaking of, it’s nearly time for you to go and you shouldn’t waste the opportunity of having access to a quasi-bathroom. So go on, I’ll even promise I won’t go looking for trouble while you’re gone,” said Jensen with a smile while giving him a slight push in the back. 

A quick look at his watch showed that he only had 15 minutes until Clay wanted to set out and since Jensen was right in regards to the bathroom he gave an agreeing head tilt and went. 

When he stepped back into the main room Jensen was standing by the door holding out the case with the comm-units and the others ready to go. 

Clay was the first in line and took one out while informing Jensen, that they would only do a check-in in the evening today. Then after clasping Jensen on the shoulder he was out of the door. 

Roque was next, warning Jensen to not burn down the hut and then they clasped hands and bumped shoulders before the SIC followed Clay, his comm in hand. 

Pooch, after taking his unit first, exchanged a one-armed hug with Jensen, told him to take care and then left. 

And then it was only the two of them, standing by the door and Cougar hesitated for a moment, not sure how to express all the things he wanted to say and not even sure if he had all the words he needed. 

Jensen just took one long look at him before pulling him into a tight embrace which he gladly reciprocated because it worked _perfectly_ to get his point across. 

Jensen being Jensen felt the need to add words. 

“Take care Cougs.” A slight hesitation, “and don’t make me wait for too long, yeah?” 

Cougar just tightened his arms for a moment in response before stepping back, taking the last comm-unit and tipping his hat at Jensen in a deliberately exaggerated manner. 

The laughing “Oh, get going you silly cat” it earned him sparked a warm feeling in his chest as he stepped out into the cool morning air where the others were waiting for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be continued in the next chapter. 
> 
> Edit 06.08.17: Many thanks to Ketravai who took the time to point out some mistakes I made.


	4. ...but I'm trying to come back in time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo... obviously I can't be relied upon to accurately judge the lenghts of my chapters, because before I cut it to bring you this part it was around 25k long. And it's still growing and I have no idea how long it'll get in the end.
> 
> Again the details of the mission are sparse.
> 
>  **Warnings** : casual killing of nameless people and some lamguage
> 
>  
> 
> Language key:  
> ~blah~ transmissions
> 
> Translations for all readers on mobile devices:  
> Estoy bien = I'm fine  
> Y tu? = And you?  
> Buenas noches = Good night  
> Estoy seguro = I'm sure  
> Cálmate = Calm down  
> Lo prometo = I promise

## ...but I'm trying to come back in time

 

### Day 1

Unfortunately Jensen's smile was the highlight of the day and it just went downhill from there. 

They checked two of the locations Jensen had marked for where they might be able to procure a vehicle, but both were a bust forcing them to continue on foot after having wasted time on the detours. And even though Cougar pushed the pace up as much as he safely could, by the time Clay called for him to stop pushing forward and instead look for a good camping place they hadn’t covered as much distance as he’d wanted to. 

After camp had been set up Clay radioed Jensen. 

“Lazybones this is Honcho, do you copy?” 

~Sure do, Honcho. 

~And I still protest this callsign. I’m not being lazy. I totally did my PT today. 

~But how was your day?~ 

“Quiet. We took the scenic route so it was a lot of walking. 

“Anything happen that I should know about?” 

~Well since I had the time I made sure that my access for the weather forecast got updated. You’ll be happy to hear that tomorrow is supposed to be just as friendly as today was though a tad more windy.~ 

“Really Lazybones?” asked Clay exasperated before heaving a sigh. “I don’t even know why I’m surprised. Just make sure that you don’t kick up too much of a fuss.” 

~I would never. And I’m insulted that you think I would. So I don’t want to talk to your vilification-y self anymore. Is one of the others free to talk? Please? After all I had to sit here all by my lonesome all day long.~ 

“See? That’s why you’ve got the callsign you have Lazybones,” cut in Roque who had been in charge of appointing callsigns for this mission. 

Shaking his head at the childish behavior of his SIC Clay left him with the task to give Jensen the, carefully changed, camp coordinates. It was a failsafe to narrow down the search area in case something happened and they needed rescue. 

“Anyone else want to talk to Lazybones?” inquired Roque, practically brandishing the mike. 

“Sí,” answered Cougar which earned him a few surprised looks. Inwardly he rolled his eyes. There was absolutely no reason for the others to act so shocked. After all he wasn’t _that_ uncommunicative. Most just didn’t pick up on his unspoken words. 

Taking the mike from Roque he proceeded to ignore the others while greeting Jensen with a soft “Hola”. 

~Oh hi! What did I do to earn myself this honor? Because, you know, I didn’t actually expect you to call and amuse me. 

~Or is there something the matter with you?~ 

" _Estoy bien. Y tu?_ " 

~You know, right now I feel this deep urge to whine your name just so you know how I feel about this question and all that it implies. 

~But since I can’t let me reiterate: the amount of trouble that can happen to me is limited and I’m perfectly safe given the situation.~ 

Cougar let his silence speak for itself. 

~Really, man? Do you honestly have such little faith in my ability to take care of myself and stay out of trouble?~ 

A moment of silence. 

~Fine. Just stop it with the judging silence. And don’t even start with the smirking! 

~So you left. I got bored. Did my PT. Washed up. Got bored again. Ate lunch. And just to mix things up I got even more bored before I made that update happen. After I fell back into boredom. Repeated some of my PT just to have something to do. Got your call. And sadly it will probably be the highlight of my day. Will eat afterwards. And then go to sleep early just to escape further boredom. 

~Are you happy now that you know the _immensely thrilling_ details of my day?~ 

“Sí.” 

~Great. Good for you. 

~Is there anything else or was that it?~ 

" _Buenas noches._ " 

~Yeah, you too. 

~Lazybones out.~ 

“Jesus, I know the kid needs a keeper and that you’ve taken it upon yourself to look out for him – and I am glad about that – but don’t you think you’re taking things a bit too far?” asked Roque in the quiet that had fallen over the camp after the call disconnected. 

Cougar just shrugged noncommittally and went about preparing his own MRE. Jensen had sounded fine during the call. The grousing had been expected and everything had been normal as far as he could tell. 

He therefore had nothing he could tell the team to explain his additional vigilance. Nothing besides the bad feeling he’d gotten during the mission briefing and the little things that had been off about Jensen since then. 

If he explained the others would listen but they would also brush off the little things as Jensen simply being Jensen and sure things might be off, but they’d never run a mission like this before so he couldn’t actually be sure that they were off in a bad way and not in a normal way. And he was probably simply projecting his own worry because he didn’t have Jensen within his sight and couldn’t get to him quickly if needed. 

Maybe they wouldn’t be quite as quick to dismiss things if Cougar were to explain to them the depth of his understanding with Jensen but even if he found the right words to do so he shied away from the thought. 

Their understanding was private and they’d never even talked about it to each other. Telling the other Losers about it would be akin to a betrayal. Especially since he would be doing so without Jensen’s knowledge or permission. 

It was simply unimaginable to him. 

He was glad when Clay ordered them to get ready for sleep since it gave him something to do instead of just sitting around and worrying. 

Since they’d spent the whole day walking and would do more of the same tomorrow everyone got a two hour long guard shift this time in order of Pooch, Clay, Cougar and finally Roque. 

Since he would need to be up again in four hours Cougar forced himself to fall asleep.

 

### Day 2

Cougar's watch had been calm but he could still feel his interrupted sleep in the sluggishness that dodged his steps until about half an hour after they’d broken their camp down. It was the reason he hated taking middle shifts – whatever sleep he got afterwards always seemed inferior and left him feeling dissatisfied and lethargic. 

They spend the morning stretched out. He was scouting ahead to make sure their agreed upon route was clear while Roque watched their backs and Pooch and Clay were in the middle with the additional bulk of the field radio that they traded between them regularly. 

They convened in the late midmorning for the check-in with Jensen which was pretty short since there was nothing new to report and Cougar couldn’t just start another conversation with the tech when they only were at a temporary resting point. 

Everything was going all right and they managed to cover quite a bit of ground right up until Clay recalled him and Roque because Jensen had contacted them. 

Once they were all gathered around the field radio Clay took charge. 

“Okay Lazybones, what do you have that you called us?” 

~You remember how I told you today would be a bit windier today? 

~Yeah, that was because there is this storm that has been building itself up for some time now and originally it should have passed this region by unnoticed, but a few hours ago something shifted and it’s been slowly changing course and now it’s heading pretty much straight for you and it’s going to be nasty so you really, really should find some place to hunker down.~ 

“How long do we have until it hits?” 

~Probably about an hour and a half if it doesn’t pick up any more speed.~ 

“Okay. We’ll contact you once we have secured a camp. 

“Honcho out.” 

~Hurry guys, okay? I really don’t like what I’m seeing. 

~Lazybones out.~ 

“Well you heard him. Pooch have you found something yet?” asked Clay of their mechanic who had pulled out the tablet as soon as Jensen had said ‘hunker down’ and who was scanning the satellite photos for viable options. 

“These images may be high res but there is still a limit to how much I can zoom in. And if I go any faster there is a chance I might overlook something since I’m not nearly as practiced in this as Jay and that wouldn’t be helpful at all, so just hold your horses and let me work. 

“Sir.” The last part was added after some silence, a clear indication that Pooch did not appreciate Clay pressuring him. 

Cougar tilted his head so that his hat would hide the amusement in his eyes. Pooch might be the most even tempered of their team and do this best to diffuse tensions when they arose but that just made it that much better if he did snap back. At least as long as you weren’t the one on the receiving end. 

“Okay, I think I’ve found our best bet,” announced Pooch five minutes later and turned the tablet to show them his choice. 

After a studying it for a moment Clay nodded his approval. 

“Roque, Cougar hand over your halves of the pup tents. Pooch and I will head directly to the spot and set up camp. I want you two to flank us at about 450 yards and start to circle towards each other once you’re parallel to the camp site. Meet up at the apex and head straight back to us. 

“If you find a sign that a human breached your side of the perimeter call it in and Pooch or I will check it out. 

“We’ll give you a ten minutes headstart.” 

Cougar studied the map one last time before re-shouldering his pack and setting off, Roque moving away from him at a 90 degree angle. 

While doing his recon the wind picked up and the light got slowly dimmer. 

At one point Roque reported that he’d found tracks but that they were leaving the area. Later Clay told them that their designated spot showed signs of there having been another camp set up not too long ago. Assuming the tracks belonged to whoever had camped there, it was possible that their entry point might be too old to be obvious. 

Cougar had to concede that it was likely as neither he nor Roque picked up any other sign until they met up. 

When they reached camp the tents were set up and Clay told them that he’d already spoken to Jensen, who’d given him his best estimation of the storms duration and that they would spend the night here as a result. 

Additionally, since they wouldn’t be moving any further today they also wouldn’t contact Jensen again until the next morning which Cougar wasn’t happy to hear, causing him to retreat into his and Pooch’s tent after relieving himself on last time before the storm could start. 

Pooch joined him not much later in the steadily growing darkness bringing the field radio with him. 

“We’re housing it because your skinny self doesn’t take up that much space,” explained Pooh when he saw Cougar’s gaze resting on it, “at least according to Roque. I think he deliberately forgot about your rifle because, no offence, that thing is pretty unwieldy in such a small tent. 

“How do you and Jensen manage it usually?” 

As he had talked Pooch had stored his pack and the radio by the headend and had rolled out his bedroll at the other side of the tent, leaving a small middle space where Cougar's rifle rested before Cougar’s own sleeping roll sat at the edge of the tent. Because of the placement there was a real chance of tripping over the rifle while getting in or out. 

And since Jensen was at times absent minded enough to not look where he was going it was actually somewhat dangerous – for both the weapon and the human. After a few near misses they’d come up with a simple solution. The two of them just slept close to each other on one side with Jensen next to the tarp and the rifle resting on the free space besides Cougar. It had the added benefit of allowing him to use Jensen as a space heater if necessary. 

But this arrangement only worked because they were so comfortable with being in each other’s space. And although Cougar had long since learned how to cope in cramped quarters – you can’t really not if you’re a part of the army – if given a choice he preferred not to share his personal space. Even if the other person was a part of the team and he knew them well. Jensen was simply the exception that proved the rule. 

In the end he just replied with, “Practice.” 

“Fair enough,” concede Pooch after a beat. 

“Anyway, Clay decided that we won’t post a guard during the storm but just in case someone is out and about during it we’re not allowed to light a lamp. Which kind of sucks because if it gets any darker all we can do is either: talk, meditate or sleep.” 

Cougar, who was stretched out on his bedroll and whose hat accordingly rested half on top of his face, tipped the brim up enough to look over to his friend. All he could make out were the man’s silhouette and the whites of his eyes. 

A flash of teeth let him know that Pooch had caught up to his actions. 

“Hey there Coug. How nice to know you’re paying attention and aren’t actually asleep. I mean you answered just now but that doesn’t have to actually mean anything about this very moment. 

“And I’m sure you know that I can never tell with absolute certainty what’s going on beneath your hat and contrary to Jensen I don’t enjoy talking to myself… or to hold both ends of a conversation up.” 

Cougar knew that Pooch meant no harm by bringing Jensen up but he was worried as it was and a reminder that the blond wasn’t with them was something he really didn’t need right now. 

To signal the end of this conversation he let his hat drop back down which earned him a snort and a “Fine, be that way.” but thankfully Pooch let it go. 

Silence descended down on them. 

Ironically Cougar was torn between wishing that Pooch would start talking again and hoping that he wouldn’t. 

A rustle caught his attention but by the sounds of it Pooch was simply lying down. 

Silence reigned again. 

Normally he wouldn’t mind. He enjoyed silence. However right now it too just served as a reminder that Jensen wasn’t there to combat it. And that Clay had denied him his chance to check up on the tech’s well being and hear his voice. And that there was no way that they would be able to finish the mission in three days now. And that he still didn’t know what would happen if they missed the three-days-mark. 

He had some hope that nothing bad would actually happen, because Jensen would not have agreed to go on a potential nine day long mission if he would be unable to do his job after three days. So there should still be time. 

Furthermore Jensen was, all signs to the contrary aside, vastly intelligent. He had the highest IQ of the team and he could utilize it if he wanted. So if he truly suffered consequences by not interacting with people it would only make sense that he’d uphold a certain buffer to minimize the chances of triggering them. 

The question was how big that buffer was and how many days of grace that bought them to finish the mission before the hacker’s time ran out. And also if the check-ins had any effect on Jensen’s status or not. 

Unfortunately Cougar had no way of telling, one way or the other. All he had were Jensen’s words concerning alcohol and dying of dehydration and they weren’t very informative. Taken at face value they certainly implied that the check-ins could affect the situation. 

But taking Jensen at face value was a stupid thing to do and anyway Cougar had the feeling that they had been more a dramaturgic device to throw the others off so that they wouldn’t catch on that something important was actually going on with him. 

The sudden sound of many drops of water hitting the tarp shocked him out of his thoughts. 

There had been absolutely no warning that the silence would be interrupted and now the tent was filled with the impossible loud noise the rain generated. It must be raining buckets to produce that loud a sound – certainly not something you wanted to get caught unaware in. 

“Hey, everything alright with you?” asked Pooch barely loud enough to be heard and seemingly out of the blue. Or maybe he’d seen Cougar startle as the rain started coming down. 

“Sí,” he replied because he might feel like he was losing his head out of worry and had sunken deeper in thought than was sensible while out on the field and with no one on guard to boot but essentially he was okay. 

“You sure? ‘Cause earlier it seemed as though you were pissed off,” persisted the mechanic. 

“I worry,” conceded Cougar because he knew that Pooch wouldn’t let things be if he suspected that they could cause tension and therefore problems within the team. Furthermore he knew that as long as they didn’t start shouting Clay and Roque wouldn’t hear a thing and he’d rather do it under these circumstances than in front of them. Which was probably why Pooch had waited to start the conversation until the rain had set in. 

“About…?” 

He ignored the prompt because it really should be obvious. 

“Okay, so I’m making a wild guess and say Jensen simply because of your conversation yesterday and because Jensen said to tell you not to be such a total worrywart and that he was fine. 

“You should have seen Clay’s face at the word ‘worrywart’. It was hilarious. And I don’t think he took it all that serious. 

“Actually neither did I but since you just said that you worry, well, I guess you proved Jay right about the amount of worry you’re expressing.” 

Warmth spread through him and he could practically feel some of his worry disperse. Even if it wasn’t much it was enough to make him feel as if he could breathe a little bit easier. 

“Gracias,” he said to Pooch because his mother had raised him with manners and Pooch certainly deserved the acknowledgement. 

“Hey man, the message was for you and I’m not a big enough dick to withhold it from you. Never mind that I’d never hear the end of it from Jensen once he realized that I didn’t do it. 

“But don’t you think you’re taking things a bit far? I mean sure, we’ve never had to split up for days on a mission before and the kid can find trouble in a paper bag but he does know what to do and, more importantly in his case, what _not_ to do on a mission. Plus his position is secure. 

“And if against all odds someone is going to stumble on the station he _does_ know how to take care of himself. 

“So have some faith in him and his abilities and lay off the worry some. 

“What do you say?” concluded Pooch his pep-talk. 

“Maybe,” he said mostly to let Pooch think that he did accomplish something and would therefore let the matter drop. 

It must have worked because silence descended upon them again. Well as quiet as it can get with heavy rain constantly hitting the tarp. But Cougar actually found it soothing, this constant noise that reminded him a little bit of Jensen tipping away on his keyboards. 

In the end it lulled him into an easy sleep. 

 

### Day 3

Cougar woke to an empty stomach and a full bladder. 

It was silent in the tent. There was no sound of water raining down on them anymore but he couldn’t hear Pooch’s breathing either. 

Pushing the button on his watch that caused it to light up the display, he nearly groaned out loud when he saw the time. Basically it was ass-o’clock-in-the-morning meaning that he’d slept through dinner, the rain ending and the establishing of guard shifts. 

Knowing that he occasionally had problems with getting enough sleep the others must have decided to simply let him sleep as much as possible when he hadn’t woken up on his own. 

Getting up and leaving the tent he looked around for Pooch. After a few moments Cougar spied him and moved toward him calling out softly to announce his presence. After all it wouldn’t do to startle his teammember. 

“Morning, Cougar. Slept enough?” 

“Sí.” 

“That’s good. You’ve probably guessed already but you’ve got the last shift.” 

“Give me five. Then go sleep.” 

“You sure? That would leave you with a nearly three and a half hour long shift.” 

" _Estoy seguro_ ," he assured. 

“Well I’m not about to look a gift horse in the mouth. 

“You eaten anything yet?” asked Pooch and when Cougar shook his head he admonished, “At least eat the bread if nothing else, okay? I can wait those five more minutes easily.” 

Nodding his agreement he went off to take care of his bladder before going back to their tent and opening up one of his MREs. 

A short meal later he spelled Pooch and started his own rounds. 

At the end of his shift Cougar reentered the camp and woke the others up before consuming the rest of his MRE. 

After they had all eaten they proceeded to break down camp only to be interrupted when the field radio sputtered to life. 

~This is Lazybones. Does anybody copy?~ 

“This is Honcho. What do you have?” 

~More bad news I’m afraid. 

~It seems that the rain washed some things loose. But I’m not quite sure about the extend yet and whether it will actually affect you or not.~ 

“And why aren’t you sure?” 

~Because even with several filters there is only so much I can do with night shots. So general comparison yes, detailed comparison no. 

~There is another satellite scheduled to pass over this region in about an hour and I plan to get some new pics then but I’ll need some additional time to run the analysis and to look over the results.~ 

“How much time are we talking here?” 

~All in all? I can probably get back to you in about two maximal three hours.~ 

“Can you send us the new pictures as soon as you have them so we can at least check today’s planned route?” 

~Negative. The tablet is cut off from all remote access. It’s just a storage unit. So you can alter what you have but you need a direct connection, as in a cable, to upload new content. 

~So once I have the results I’ll give you the coordinates and a description about what changed.~ 

“Alright. 

“We’ll stay put until then. No use in going off blindly and then having to detour. 

“Priorize the information though. For now what’s in front of us is less important than what’s behind us. That will hold until the evening.” 

~Roger that. 

~Talk to you later. Lazybones out.~ 

“Honcho out. 

“Well you heard him. Seems like we won ourselves some free time. Any suggestions?” asked Clay. 

“I still have my deck with me,” offered Pooch. 

Since no one had any other propositions they did spend the time playing cards, with the loser of one round on watch for the next four hands. 

When Jensen call them again Pooch took up post next to the field radio with the tablet in hand to input the new data while Clay and Roque looked over his shoulder to see if their route was altered. 

In the end it was actually lucky that they were already off their original route since it shortened the detour they were indeed forced to take. Even if it didn’t amount to much in Cougars opinion because, courtesy of their late start and the longer route, they didn’t get nearly as close to the compound as he wanted to be. 

Once they’d set up camp in the evening and contacted Jensen Pooch got first turn in order to complete the actualization of their map but as soon as he was finished Cougar made sure to confiscate the mic. 

He didn’t even have to say anything before Jensen was talking. 

~Hey there. 

~Did you know that your silence has a certain kind of really recognizable flavor? 

~Well actually it has many kinds of flavors and I find it fascinating that this form of communication still works without visuals because up until now I always figured that your facial expressions and body language relayed the main information and your silence enhanced them but obviously that is not the case since I can still clearly understand your ‘get on with it and tell me what I actually want to know’-message. 

~And now I’m getting the feeling that you’re saying ‘well since you know what I want to hear why aren’t you telling it to me yet’ without a question mark might I add because although it should be a question you make it seem like it’s a statement and that is really impressive. 

~So anyways. As you might have already guessed I was up some of the night, and I promise it was only some of it and not all of it, to get that first batch of pictures and analyze them but I totally went back to bed and got some more sleep. 

~And I ate breakfast before I contacted you all the first time so you can’t even nag me for skipping a meal. 

~But at least I didn’t have to suffer from any boredom until after I gave you the first set of data. And hey at least I got to talk to someone for quite a while which is a lot more than yesterday because Clay was being his usual stingy self and Pooch wasn’t all that communicative either. 

~Did they at least tell you not to worry your head off because they robbed you of your chance to interrogate me? Because I know you’re a total worrywart and I don’t care if they don’t believe me because it’s the truth and all their denial and unobserving of this fact doesn’t change it. But you can’t hide it from me because I totally have your number, so take that. Hah! 

~Back to the things you want to know about, I was about to tell you about my lunch and how I passed the afternoon in a mind numbing mix of boredom, PT and watching the weather channel which really isn’t as interesting as one might guess. Or maybe you have to be obsessed with weather to find it interesting? 

~And I’m kind of wondering if it’s possible for your brain to melt because of boredom? Because it sure feels like it at times. 

~Other than that I’m starting to miss you because the silence here isn’t flavored and I never really noticed that you _do_ that but now I’m kinda feeling like an addict that has run out of his favorite drug. Not that I actually know what it is like to be addicted to something, except maybe sugar and technology and now your flavored silences, because they somehow make silence less boring, but yeah never did any drugs because _someone_ would have had my head if I had even contemplated it much less if I’d actually done it. 

~So shame on you for adding to my vices. 

~Annnd I’ve gotten off topic again, haven’t I? Not that there is much more to tell. Eating dinner is next and then I’ll go sleep to try and catch up on those hours I didn’t get tonight. 

~What about you? Anything interesting to tell?~ 

The long pause that followed the question made it obvious that Jensen thought he could get him to talk. Even if it was only a ‘no’. Not that it was going to work since he had the greater patience. 

“You finally finished over there? If not then wrap it up,” called Clay, evidently using the pause to get a word in. 

~What did I say? Stingy!~ answered Jensen, who at times and when it suited him seemed to have the ears of a bat, promptly. 

~So I guess this is it for the day. I absolutely expect to hear, or not to hear as things might be, from you tomorrow. Unforeseen circumstances aside.~ 

“Sí,” agreed Cougar and was fully prepared to put the mic back down but when Jensen didn’t immediately sign off he hesitated. 

“J?” inquired Cugar softly and he would have liked to use his friend's actual name for better impact but protocol was protocol so the first letter would have to do. 

~Nothing.~ 

Pause. 

~Just, obviously it’s now impossible to hit the three day mark, but do you think you could manage the five or six day one? If only to save me from finding out if you can sustain brain damage from boredom.~ 

The last was clearly intended as a joke and the delivery was spot on, yet to Cougar it still fell short. 

“I’ll try,” he promised with a firm voice. 

~My poor brain thanks you. 

~Lazybones out.~ 

There was his deadline thought Cougar to himself later as he lay on his bedroll trying to sleep because he had the third watch shift again. 

They were about half a day out from the compound. If they had the whole afternoon to scout it they should be able to launch their attack in the evening, at night or in the early morning. And if they pushed the pace on the way back they could reach Jensen on the sixth day easily. Or even the fifth if they could liberate a vehicle from the compound itself or somewhere nearby. 

All they needed was to catch a break and, Dios willing, everything would work out fine. 

That was the last thought he had before he slipped into sleep. 

 

### Day 4

They didn’t catch a break. 

Not even two hours after they had set out from camp they had to backtrack a bit because the ground had given out beneath Roque, who was still on rearguard, and he’d taken a nasty fall. 

However in the end it luckily wasn’t quite as bad as it could have been. A multitude of bruises, some minor abrasions and a slight sprain to one ankle, that would have been worse without the stabilization provided by the boot and one of his knife’s sheath, were all their SIC suffered from. 

So Cougar bandaged the ankle and gave Roque some pain meds that also acted as anti-inflammatory. Next they shifted their gear around and jury-rigged a crutch before setting off again at a slower pace and with Pooch at the rear. 

They also made sure to regularly take breaks to give Roque’s ankle at least some rest although the man himself protested that he didn’t need it. 

By the time they reached their pre-chosen campsite in the early evening though Roque was sweaty, his jaws were locked tightly together and his face had gained a slight pallor. So Clay ordered him to sit down and stay down while the rest of them made sure that the area was secure and set up camp. 

“Cougar,” said Cay once they were all back together and the camp set up, “if you want to have another lengthy chat do it while you eat because I want you to go and get a first impression of the compound, especially their motor pool. With Roque’s mobility limited I don’t want to trek the whole way back but I don’t want to call for a medevac either if I don’t absolutely have to. 

“I want you back here at 2200 at the latest. Clear?” 

“Sí,” he agreed. 

“Good. Me and Pooch will each take a three hour shift since Roque’s down and you will be active longer. 

“We’ll talk tactics in the morning. 

“If no one has anything to contribute then were finished here,” concluded Clay the briefing. 

After taking out an MRE from his pack Cougar moved over to the radio to take Clay up on his offer, because even with the reassurance that Jensen should be fine for the next two days he wasn’t about to waste an opportunity to check up on him. 

“Lazybones, please come in,” he spoke into the mic. 

~Did something else happen? Because it’s kind of early for the regular check in.~ Anxiety was thick in Jensen’s voice. Obviously he feared to get another call about one of them being hurt. 

When they’d radioed in after Roque’s fall Jensen hadn’t calmed down until after he’d spoken to Roque and Cougar had assured him that the SIC was going to be okay. 

And now Cougar had once again contacted him outside of the scheduled check-ins. No wonder Jensen was prepared to immediately jump to a bad conclusion. 

" _Cálmate_." 

“We’ve reached base camp. All is well.” 

~Oookay. 

~Not that I don’t believe you, because I totally do but that doesn’t really explain why you’re calling early.~ 

“There is still light,” replied Cougar evenly to lay further worry to rest and to get Jensen to think about something else. 

~'There is still light' seriously?! 

~You are aware that if I knew you any less this would tell me absolutely nothing about the why, right? Nothing, zilch if not to say nada. 

~And to be honest it makes you sound somewhat stupid because if you take it at face value it makes you sound as if you either can’t operate the radio in the dark or the fact that the sun is still shining made you call me. Do you really want people to think either of these things about you? 

~So how about next time you just answer with ‘I have to move out again’? Or ‘I’m going scouting’ if it’s about the amount of letters or words you have to string together. 

~Although if it’s about the amount of syllables you have to say then you’re option is admittedly the shortest. 

~Do you taste this? It’s your ‘get on with it’-silence again. And yeah, I get that we’re on a time limit here but that is no reason to be so rude about it especially since I still don’t really understand why you feel the need to go through with this every day. 

~Not that I mind humoring you, considering how often you indulge me but seriously it can’t be that interesting. I mean basically it’s always some permutation of sleep, eat, boredom and PT with occasionally some added elements like the weather channel thrown in. Which is still mind numbing to look at for longer amounts of time. Hach, the things I do for you. 

~Well today some additional worrying occurred thanks to torrential rains and unstable ground. How is our favorite SIC anyway? Is he grumbling yet because of all the things he isn’t allowed to do right now?~ 

“Ask him,” Cougar interjected before Jensen could open up a new tangent since he was finished with eating and needed to leave. 

~Got to go? Well, take care and may the sneaking force be with you! 

~Talk to you tomorrow and now give me our poor invalid so I can ask him how he is.~ 

Humming in agreement he stood and carried the equipment over to Roque. It would do the man good to listen to Jensen for a bit. There were few things as distracting as Jensen and they’d all come to appreciate his ability to give you something else to focus on other than the pain or inaction you were suffering from. 

~Dude, what are you doing? Getting into stupid situations is my job and you can’t just infringe on that simply because I’m not with you. That’s just bad manners and yes –~ 

Tuning Jensen out, he made his way over to Pooch and asked, “Maps?” 

“Sure bro,” answered the driver and handed the tablet over after fiddling around with it for a moment. 

Taking it with a nod of thanks he looked the area around the compound over one last time before handing the tablet back, taking up his rifle and leaving camp. 

The trek to his first potential nest was uneventful. 

The spot itself was good for observation and would allow him to cover a large portion of the compound but left him too vulnerable since he would be made after no more than two or three shots if their opponents weren’t completely stupid. In other words not worth the risk except for a case of emergency or as a back-up if things were about to be over and the risk of return fire was minimal. 

However since he was only here for recon he settled in and studied what he could see. 

Over the next few hours he switched locations twice and familiarized himself with the exact layout of the compound’s buildings and the resulting lines of fire from the two sides he’d observed and making assumptions about what he could cover from the other ones. He’d have to wait until tomorrow to see how right he was because for now he needed to return to their camp. 

When he got back he checked in with Clay, who was on guard shift, to make sure that Roque had taken the next dose of the painkiller on time before getting ready to hit the hay himself. 

Since there was no uncertainty gnawing at him and they were within the time limits sleep found him easily. 

 

### Day 5

Pooch woke Cougar in the morning at shift change. 

He enjoyed two hours of calm and silence as the darkness of the night grew lighter and the world came slowly alive around him. 

When it was time to get the others up he made short work of Pooch and Clay but left Roque to the boss since Roque’s last dose of pain meds would be wearing off by now which always left him in an extremely bad mood and made him display bouts of volatile behavior. Not something Cougar wanted to deal with if he didn’t have to. And since Clay was already sharing the tent with the injured SIC and it was part of the CO’s job to deal with the unpleasant operational aspects of their work things worked out just fine the way they were in Cougar’s opinion. 

Judging by the fist bump Pooch offered him when he caught on to what was happening the driver agreed with Cougar’s course of action. 

After they’d all eaten breakfast and the new dose of pain killers had kicked in, Clay called them together for the planning session. 

“Cougar how’s the compound look?” 

“Matching the photos. I counted six pairs of guards patrolling the perimeter. No shift changes while I watched. 

“Three possible vehicles; might be hard to get out intact. 

“Two good potential nests, here and here,” reported Cougar pointing the spots out on the map displayed on the tablet. 

“Where are the cars parked?” asked Pooch switching to an enlarged shot of the compound on witch Cougar silently pointed out the spots the cars had been parked in yesterday at the far end from the sole gate and too close to the walls to safely use explosions near them. Additionally the terrain that bordered that side of the compound was near impossible to navigate with a vehicle. 

“Yeah, the Pooch sees what you mean. 

“Clay, there’s another one of Jensen’s potential spots not even two hours from here. And since we’ll be stuck here until at least the afternoon I’d like to check it out,” said Pooch after contemplating things for a bit. 

“Alright,” agreed Clay after a long moment. “I’ll go with you and we go light. 

“Cougar I want you to go back to the compound – get me some more intel and find a route and watch point for Roque that won’t put too much stress on his ankle. 

“Roque, you’re on camp watch. I want you to rest up so that you can go with Cougar in the afternoon. And use your crutch if you absolutely need to move around. 

“Are five and a half hours enough for you Coug?” asked Clay after consulting his watch. 

Cougar roughly calculated the distance he wanted to cover and how much time that left him to do his observations. Personally he would have preferred to have more time but since the plan was to later return with Roque, who couldn’t move all that fast, in tow then it would have to do. 

So he simply nodded his acquisition. 

“Good. 

“Roque, take it easy while we’re gone. And keep that ankle elevated as much as you can. 

“Pooch, go grab your kit. 

“Cougar, set out,” commanded Clay while standing up. 

Cougar tipped the brim of his hat at his team before shouldering his rifle and setting off at a brisk pace. After all the shorter he could cut his travelling time the longer he could observe his target. 

When he was on his way back to camp he was content with what he’d accomplished on his outing. In the bright light of the day he’d been able to detect several indentations that showed that the compound had been built not too long ago and that the materials and the ground were still settling – creating small weaknesses that they’d be able to exploit. 

He hoped that the others had been similarly successful. 

Unfortunately the only person to greet him on his entry was a grim faced Roque. Who promptly opened his mouth and delivered a message Cougar _really_ didn’t want to hear. 

“There’s been a change of orders.” 

“Qué?!” 

“Yeah, we’re not happy about it either. 

“Clay was here a while back to check in and to pass on that Pooch has found a car that he’s confident he can get running again even if it takes him a bit and gas might still be a problem. He’s left to go and tell Pooch that he’s got the time now but he’ll be back to take over watch here at the camp while we’re going on our outing. 

“Anyways, remember how it was our job to simply blow the joint up so that they wouldn’t be able to establish a foothold in this area? 

“Apparently they’re moving a lot faster than expected and according to someone the first drug-shipment is already on its way with an ETA of tomorrow evening or somewhere there about. 

“So now we first have to confirm the contents of the shipment and then destroy it too. 

“When we set out later you’re going to drop me off at one of your potential nests and then go out further to scout the road. 

“And since that could take a bit longer you’re supposed to get some rest until Clay’s back. 

“Oh and don’t forget to eat something beforehand.” 

Cougar nodded his compliance although he knew he would need to fight to get every bite down and that there was no way he could do more than lie down and pull his hat over his eyes. 

He kept his thoughts tightly reined until he had at last finished his ration and stretched himself out on the ground using one arm as a pillow since he didn’t want to lie in the tent. 

He wanted to pester Roque into telling him how exactly the conversation with Jensen had gone and if that undercurrent of quiet pleading had made a reappearance. He could still hear it clear as day in the moment when Jensen had asked him to make at least the six day mark. 

And even though he might have only promised that they would try and this latest delay wasn’t in any way, shape or form their fault – but it was because if they’d managed to complete the mission earlier there would have been no change in order because their original order would have been already carried out – it still felt like he’d let Jensen down and broken his promise. 

He hated being made to break his promises. He could feel the resentment at whoever made the change built up in his bones and knew that if he let it grow unchecked it would turn him cold inside until it would be so _very_ easy to convince himself that one calculated and clean shot would be an appropriate response. But it wasn’t, because from a tactical viewpoint the change of order was only logical. 

So he would smother the resentment until it faded into nothingness, because he knew that if he started to pick his own targets based on his own emotions he’d be stepping onto a slippery slope. One that he never wanted stand on because he’d seen what it could do to people like him. How it could twist them until he wouldn’t be able to recognize himself in the mirror anymore and he never ever wanted to end up like that. So it was best to just never start the journey. 

A dark voice whispered from the recesses of his mind that he wouldn’t care quite as much anymore if Jensen came to grievous harm because the new order prevented him from getting back to him in time. 

He wanted to call Jensen and demand to know what was going to happen when the time ran out. Right to secrets and the fact that they didn’t know each other that well be damned. 

He wanted to be back at the relay-station and shake some sense into Jensen so that he wouldn’t stay silent about such risks to himself in the future. 

He wanted to rant at him for doing so in the first case. 

He wanted Jensen to know that if he confided in Cougar, he would do his utmost to honor that trust even to his own detriment. 

He wanted Jensen to truly and fully _understand_ that he was a Loser now and that they took care of each other. That even though they mocked and threatened one another they always, always had each other’s backs if there was an actual problem. That regardless of what exactly the problem might be they’d find a way to deal with it together. 

But the simple truth of the matter was, unfortunately, that he couldn’t do any of these things at the moment. And that in some cases he didn’t even have the right to do them either. 

Cougar certainly couldn’t force Jensen to entrust him with his secret. Jensen would either confide in him at some point or not. And it wasn’t as if Cougar didn’t have some things he never wanted to share with anybody either, regardless of how much he trusted them otherwise. 

The crackling of the radio saved him from sinking any further into troubling thoughts. 

~This is Lazybones, you there, Gerber?~ 

“Yeah I copy. 

“What’ve you got?” replied Roque after picking up the mic, all the while sending amused glances towards Cougar who’d promptly sat up when Jensen had started speaking and who was now coming closer. 

~Well, the intel on our expected package seems to check out. I’m not quite sure who talked to who because it origins from an ATF source and this isn’t exactly their jurisdiction, which might be why they passed it on, but it doesn’t really explain how someone who was privy to our mission heard of it in time to get the new orders to us. 

~I could try to trace it, but honestly? Even if I manage to reconstruct the information flow it won’t be done in time for tomorrow. Not with the limited equipment I have here and how much time I already needed to even find out that it stemmed from the ATF in the first place.~ 

“Then leave it. As long as we’re not being fucked over more than usual I’m contend. 

“Can you give us a better window for the ETA though?” 

~Unfortunately no. If I either knew the route they’re taking or what the vehicle looked like I could try a few things but since I don’t all I could really do is monitor the access road to the compound. And since it’s only about two to three miles long from the turnoff till the compound gates that would only give you some really poor warning.~ 

“Okay. 

“We have, at last, a car of our own lined up if things go well so if we manage to get things taken care of tomorrow we’ll see you the day after. 

“And now I’ll hand the mic to your caretaker, since he seems very keen on talking to you. Don’t gossip for too long. 

“Gerber out,” said Roque and passed the mic over to Cougar with a shit-eating grin while Jensen protested the notion that he had or even needed a caretaker in the first place. 

“I’ll go lie down in the tent for a bit, since I’m not in the mood for your mushiness,” explained Roque after catching the questioning gaze Cougar send him upon seeing the SIC get up. 

~Is anybody even listening to me? If the answer happens to be ‘no’ then let me tell you that you’re all rude assholes and I’m going to sign off and leave you to each other’s company.~ 

Jensen’s slightly raised voice drew his attention from where Roque was using the crutch to make a pretty fast if slightly awkward progress towards his tent – his mind was automatically calculating how long they would need to get in position if the taller male could keep the pace up all the way – back to half forgotten mic in his hand. 

“You wouldn’t,” countered Cougar with absolute certainty. 

~You can’t just decide that! 

~I’ve had plenty to do today to keep the boredom at bay so I’m absolutely not depending on you listening to me to entertain me. Therefore I could totally hang up if I’m being ignored.~ 

Silence. 

~Okay, you’re right. I wouldn’t just hang up because having someone to talk to absolutely beats just having a task to keep myself busy. But that doesn’t mean that you can just dismiss my threats like that. Or be that smug about being right. 

~I’m being serious here! And your ‘keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better, but I know the truth’-silence is totally cramping my style. And I can almost _see_ the sardonic hat tilt you’re somehow pulling off so just stop it. 

~And that’s one more of these things I never knew were possible before I met you – hmm I should maybe coin that expression? Give it all caps? I’d need to abbreviate it somehow or it really would be a mouthful to say every time… 

~Anyways back to Things I Never Knew Were Possible Before I Met You – it does have a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? – I never knew that hats could be so very expressive. Your Hat more so than your hat but I think that’s just because it is made of leather and a cowboy hat which makes it so much more dignified. Dignified things emote better. Everybody knows that. After all it’s the same with beings. Except of course if they have they’re poker face on then you’re just plain out of luck if you want to get emotions from them. 

~Is that you’re secret superpower? Being capable of making other things expressive? First your silences then your hats and what’s next? I definitely draw the line if you’re thinking about making your shoes emote because while shoes can and may be used as a fashion statement they should not under any circumstance express thoughts and feelings. 

~That’s what t-shirts with prints are for. At least for us mere mortals whose things don’t emote at their owner’s behest. Which leaves you at a very clear and very unfair advantage, because of the amount of messages you can convey at any given moment while we’d be forced to change clothes. 

~And when did you lose so much of your patience? I haven’t been talking _that_ long yet but you’re already trying to push the conversation to the topic you want to hear about. 

~I’d really like to know what knocked off your equilibrium in such a way, because usually you’re just about the most even-keeled individual that I know but ever since you set off you’ve been… I don’t know. Off. Not really upset, that doesn’t quite fit, but more like expressing your worry in a distressingly obvious way? Does that make any sense?~ 

Jensen’s question made him smile ruefully. Of course Jensen would catch on to the fact that Cougar had been keeping as close taps on him as possible and not blame it on the type of mission they were running the way Pooch, and probably the others too, had done. After all their understanding went both ways. 

But there was precious little _Cougar_ could do about the situation since it originated from Jensen being off first and doing his utmost to keep up the façade that everything was normal. 

Of course if he didn’t do _something_ they’d both just continue to feed their worries off of the others'. And that was something neither of them needed. 

" _Estoy bien_ ," he soothed, putting all of his conviction into the words. " _Lo prometo_." 

~Yeah, okay. I believe you. I’d be an ass not to after that. 

~And I’m too. Fine I mean. Still missing you and sick of this mission but otherwise I’m fine. 

~And not nearly as bored as I might have implied previously because I’ve long since learned how to entertain myself even if I only have limited computer activity to keep me busy. I had to or I would have gone insane a long time ago. 

~I think it’s actually the waiting that’s been eating at me the most. I just don’t have your patience and you know how time seems to just get slower and slower the more you wait for something? Not good at dealing with that feeling. Me, I mean. You on the other hand are probably not even fazed by it. Is that a natural immunity or a learned behavior? If I had to hazard a guess I’d say it’s a mixture of those two options. It has to be because otherwise you’d never have experienced the absolute hell of sitting in class and waiting for the last five minutes to finally be over so that you can rush out and enjoy the sweet freedom of not being cooped up in a small room with over twenty other teenagers. And that would just be plain unfair. 

~So I’m right, right?~ 

The more Jensen babbled the more relaxed Cougar became. For now Jensen was truly fine and his worry concerning Cougar himself was obviously appeased. And the fact that this was the most personal relevant and revealing conversation they’d had since the start of the mission did send its own message, because, contrary to popular opinion, Jensen did have a brain-to-mouth-filter and chose his topics carefully – for the most part at least. 

Of course it couldn’t actually squelch Cougar’s desire to ask if Jensen would still be fine two days from now but it did appease him enough that he was comfortable to wait with it until tomorrow when it would be a bit more inconspicuous. 

And since Jensen was being honest with him Cougar was content to answer the blond’s latest attempt to weasel information out of him concerning Cougar’s own background with an affirmative hum. 

Furthermore he honestly believed that there was not a single adult alive that had never experienced the cruel drag of time while waiting for a class to finish. 

~Oh I’m good! Because I totally knew it. Now if I manage to accurately guess the ratio you all will have to bow to my superior intellect. But I’m afraid that will have to wait until you judged it and decided on one, because until you’ve made your decision you could just flat out deny any numbers I give you and that would so not be okay! So tell me as soon as you made your evaluation and reached a result so that I can take my guess. 

~Actually we should totally get the others involved as well just to make things more interesting. And just so you know? Even though they have the advantage of knowing you longer I’m still planning, and am confident that I will manage, to emerge the winner of this contest. How else could I truly prove that I have the most superior intellect if there is no competition? Because if the others aren’t participating they’d just dismiss my awesomeness. Especially our grumpy senior members. 

~Isn’t it sad what old age can cause? All this refusal to partake in fun an-~ 

“This better not be another lengthy gossiping chat I’m hearing and you should really rethink how you want to end that last remark if you don’t want to be doing CAPE as soon we’re back at base. Clear?” interrupted Clay who obviously wasn’t in the best mood after just finishing his second return trip. 

Cougar hid his smirk behind his carefully tilted brim – he was a sniper, estimating sightlines was part of his job and he’d long since figured out at what angel either of his hats would hide him and his expressions to a satisfying degree from whichever teammate’s eyes he wanted it to – because he’d heard their CO coming. After all Clay hadn’t really tried to be silent about his approach. Sneaking up on your own camp could after all result in unwanted reactions and unnecessary injuries. 

And Jensen’s chatter would have signaled that everything was fine within the camp so there had been absolutely no need to use up additional energy by being cautious. 

~Yessir. Completely clear. 

~But I totally had an official and important reason for calling, just FYI. And the two of us would, of course, never ever gossip. Especially not while using official equipment.~ 

“Quit it with the denials. 

“But since you’re still on the line you can tell me your information yourself.” 

~Sure. 

~Short version: Intel checks out and no, I can’t do anything to narrow down the ETA.~ 

“Good. 

“We can definitely get the car we’ve got up and running so getting back shouldn’t take us too long. 

“Honcho out.” 

~Glad to hear that. 

~And you, you smirking menace should be ashamed of yourself for not warning me. 

~Lazybones out.~ 

“Where’s Roque?” asked Clay while giving a fond headshake at Jensen’s antics. 

Cougar inclined his head in the direction of the tent in answer. 

“Okay, I’ll get him. 

“You good to head out again?” 

Since Clay was still looking at him he nodded before turning to gather his rifle back up again. Behind his back he could hear Clay mutter to himself, “One as bad as the other,” as he moved away which caused him to smirk again. 

And it wasn’t as if Clay hadn’t already shown his true feelings regarding Jensen and therefore him too according to that sentence. 

After making sure that he had everything he needed and what he might need because of Roque’s presence he took up a position at the edge of the camp. 

“Alright,” said Clay once he and an armed Roque – which looked at odds with his crutch – had joined Cougar, “since it’s later than originally planned I want you to forget about scouting the road for today and to just stick with Roque. Be back at 2130 at the latest. 

“If something does happen, find Roque a position that he can hold and get back here presto. Understood?” 

“Sí,” agreed Cougar with ill grace at the look Clay shot him. He could see the logic behind the order since Roque wouldn’t be able to move fast, but potentially having to leave _another_ teammate behind didn’t sit well with him. 

Turning sharply around without waiting to see if anything else would be said, he set off at a moderate pace that Roque should be able to easily match and keep up for hours. 

Behind him he heard Roque say his goodbye before moving to catch up, causing Cougar to slow down until the SIC had pulled even with him. 

They had been on the move for about ten minutes when Roque quietly spoke up, “You know, we’re all a bit off-kilter without the kid here with us, but you’re almost as bad as you were when you first joined us. 

“Now, no one’s doubting that you can do your job and do it well but think you can do it without freezing us the fuck out?” 

Cougar shrugged. 

He didn’t think that he was actually distancing himself from the others and he certainly wasn’t in the mindset he’d been in when he first got assigned to the Losers. What Roque interpreted as ‘freezing out’ was probably just Jensen missing from his side reading his silent messages and then dressing them up in words so that the rest of the team understood them too. 

And moreover it was hardly his fault if he was send out on scouting trip after scouting trip while the others were able to spend more time with each other without being tiered. He was aware that the only conversation he’d had that didn’t involve Jensen talking to him had been with Pooch and Roque wasn’t aware of that one. 

Besides on the morning where they’d played cards he’d fully participated not only in the games but also in the ribbing that always accompanied them. Of course he’d also been much less worried then. 

Or maybe Roque was interpreting his check-ins with Jensen as an attempt not to have to deal with the others. That was a distinct possibility even if it didn’t make much sense, because if Jensen had been with them Cougar would still have spent most of his time at the blond’s side listening to him. The only real difference was the radio as a barrier between them and that there were no random comments thrown in or out allowing everybody to feel as if they were part of the conversation as long as they wanted to be. 

But if that feeling of being included _was_ missing, because of the nature of the radio and how it seemingly narrowed the conversation down so that the other’s were feeling as though they weren’t a part of it, then that could lead to them getting the impressions that they were purposely being excluded. 

If that was actually the root of Roque’s problem they were at an impassive, because Cougar wasn’t willing to relinquish his check-ins with Jensen and the only way to do so was through the radio. He could of course offer the mic to someone else when he was finished but that wouldn’t change the nature of the conversations themselves. 

So there wasn’t a solution he could think of at the moment and considering that they should be all reunited in two days it wasn’t all that important to come up with one right now. He’d talk the problem over with Jensen later so that they would have a solution if a similar situation ever occurred again. 

“I’m not,” was all he could tell Roque in the end. Judging by the snort he got in return the other male didn’t fully believe him. Since no actual answer or demand for more followed, Cougar regarded the topic closed for now. They both knew where the other stood on it and respected each other enough to not outright dismiss the other’s opinion. 

The rest of the trip was mostly spend in silence except for the exchange of relevant information like the structural weaknesses Cougar had found or what the compound looked like from a different direction. In short: strictly shoptalk. 

But that was okay, they were after all there to do a job and both of them valued professionalism. Private conversations could wait until later. Or never. 

When they reentered the camp shortly before Clay’s deadline Roque’s face was lined with pain and he didn’t even protest when Clay fetched him an MRE out of their tent or when Cougar took of his boot to check his ankle out before carefully rewrapping it. 

Pooch was there too, a satisfied grin on his face and with the occasional smudge adorning his skin. And when Cougar sat down next to him the mechanic began to tell him about what he’d accomplished today. 

Which amounted to: he’d gotten the car actually running and had used the opportunity to move it closer to the camp to cut down the travelling time but it didn’t run very well or reliable but he was confident that he’d get the bugs out tomorrow. 

When it got time to turn in Clay gathered them round to explain some changes to the guard rotation. 

“Okay, since Pooch was the only one who had a middle shift last night, I want him to take first. 

“Roque, will you be able to cover one hour in the morning?” 

“Yeah sure.” 

“Good. Then we’ll go with Pooch first, me second with each of us covering two and a half hours then Cougar with the regular two hours and lastly Roque with an hour. 

“Anybody got any complains?” 

After receiving negatives all around Clay helped Roque up and through his evening routine before they both disappeared into their tent. 

Cougar mirrored them and soon found himself lying on his bedroll acutely missing Jensen’s bulk against his back. Since Jensen had the amazing ability to be wide awake shortly after being woken and usually had an easy time falling asleep too, he often got stuck with middle shifts. Coupled with the fact that Cougar preferred shifts in the early morning they commonly went to sleep together which they both found soothing to an extent. 

He didn’t know why he missed Jensen so strongly tonight, maybe because this was the first time that he had to fall asleep while completely alone in the tent, but it forced him to fall back on meditative exercises before he finally managed to fall asleep. 

 

### Day 6

Clay nudging his foot and softly calling his name woke Cougar from an uneasy sleep. After collecting his things and a short conversation with Clay he started his one watch shift. 

His two hours went by without a hitch but instead of waking Roque and returning to his tent he just continued to patrol. Clay and Roque wouldn’t be happy about it – albeit for different reasons – but they all had times when sleep just wasn’t alluring and had done this before so he knew that there wouldn’t be any consequences except having to listen to some reprimands/bitching. 

He was proven right with his prediction when over breakfast he first had to listen to Clay’s ‘We have shifts for a reason and you don’t have the authority to just change the rotation’-speech, followed by Roque’s ‘Just because I sprained my ankle, doesn’t mean I can’t pull my weight’-complain. 

Cougar just decimated his MRE and let the words wash over him. After all they all knew the true reason for his action so there was no need to either look chastened or apologetic. He’d only get into real trouble if he did it again tonight. And even then it would be motivated by worry instead of it being a simple show of power to ensure that he knew that he had to follow the rules. 

They were the Losers – rules didn’t really apply to them as long as they got the job done. And even within the team Clay was content to let most things go if they were within the parameters he’d set down for each member or the team as a whole. 

Once they’d all eaten Pooch set out for his car, Cougar to scout the road while Roque and Clay stayed behind to start making a plan for the evening when they’d hopefully be able to finally blow the compound sky-high. 

After Cougar had successfully scouted the road for good points with good cover that were also easy to reach, he had just enough of a window in his allotted timeframe left to make one last quick round around the compound to check if anything obvious had changed before having to return to camp. 

“Okay,” announced Clay as they all sat together again, “since the original plan of Roque going in quiet to plant the explosives while Pooch and I act as a distraction and Cougar providing cover as necessary isn’t feasible anymore we’re going to do it like this: 

“1) We get a nice C4-package onto the delivery van or the escort if there is one, without getting noticed. 

“2) We watch the unloading. If it is the drugs we activate the C4 via remote and simultaneously blow a hole into the back wall after clearing the guards there. 

“3) Pooch and I enter and distribute the timed explosives throughout the compound with Cougar and Roque providing support. 

“4) We get the hell out of there, meet up and drive until we’re a safe distance away. 

“Roque will be at the nest nearest to the north side of the compound, here, which is the closest and allows him to watch the front and part of the east side. He’ll have the remote trigger for the C4 and will give the starting signal. 

“Cougar I want you in a position where you can cover most of the rest of it. Since you also know the road and are the fasted runner out of us I want you to be our pitcher before taking up position in your nest. 

“Since you will be covering the back it’s also your job to clear the wall so that Pooch and I can breach safely through this wall segment here. 

“Once we’re in we split but stay near each other and try to do a clockwise circle. The timer will be set to fifteen minutes so we work fast and priorize as best as we can, since each of us will only have four charges. 

“Primary rendezvous point is here and secondary here. We wait fifteen minutes at the primary one before falling back to the second one. Half an hour at the secondary before we start looking if someone doesn’t make it or checks in with an ETA. 

“Any questions?” concluded Clay his explanation throughout which he’d used the tablet to help illustrate the plan. 

Everyone remained silent. 

“Good. Anything to report?” he asked next, mainly towards Pooch and Cougar. 

“This,” Cougar tapped one of the markings Pooch had set at one point, “car is gone.” 

“Okay. We’ll check if it’s back or still gone when Roque’s getting into position. If it’s still gone we’ll assume it will either escort or carry the delivery. If it’s back it was probably just some kind of errant. 

“How’s our car coming along Pooch?” 

“Nearly done with it. Mostly I’m just doing checks right now to ensure that there won’t be any surprises,” came the prompt reply. 

“Good. Eat something and then get back to it. I want you here with it in three hours at the latest. 

“Cougar, you eat something, too, and then take a rest for two hours before setting out. And pack up your gear so we only have to stow it onto the car. We’ll take care of the tent so don’t bother with that.” 

Taking that as the dismissal it was Cougar went to his and Pooch’s tent to repack his bedroll and to pull out his tactical vest – he didn’t like to wear it while scouting, didn’t need it either since he never took any additional magazines with him. After all the point of scouting was to remain unnoticed so there shouldn’t be any situation in which he had to shoot. 

Additional munitions for both his rifle and his handgun got stowed in separate pockets and he secured his comm-unit in its appropriate place. He put his rings in his pack and checked the fastenings of his bracelets. 

Which caused him to acutely feel Jensen’s absent again, because Jensen, for whatever reason, liked to check their wrists after missions – especially if they had split up. Or if someone had gotten hurt. 

If someone got hurt he usually tried to hide it by checking their pulse. Cougar wasn’t quite sure if all of the others had caught on yet. After all they didn’t spend quite as much time watching Jensen as he did. And for some reason Jensen always checked their right wrist. 

With Cougar though he always checked the left wrist and since it was him Jensen often didn’t bother trying to camouflage it, just took hold of Cougar’s arm and looked his fill. 

In the beginning it had been somewhat annoying since Jensen would first always fiddle with the wristband of his watch. Cougar hadn’t really appreciated the repeated loosening and re-tightening of his watchband but once it became obvious that Jensen wouldn’t be deterred from this behavior Cougar had capitulated and simply switched his watch to his right wrist. 

Since he was used to wear something around either wrist it wasn’t that much of a readjustment and now Jensen had to just nudge up the thick bracelet a bit to see whatever he was looking for. 

He could still remember the beaming smile Jensen had gifted him with upon seeing the change along with a heartfelt ‘thanks’. So even if Cougar didn’t know and couldn’t really understand _why_ Jensen felt the need to do those checks he was content to make it easier for his friend to exercise his quirk. 

Refocusing on getting ready, Cougar stowed the various small pouches that made up his field first aid kit in their proper places. This arrangement allowed him to more easily access what he really needed without sifting through a big bag, share it more easily if necessary and distributed the equipment so that he didn’t have one big bulge somewhere. 

After one last check he took out a MRE and closed his pack up. Exiting the tent again with it and his vest in hand he settled on the ground to eat while using his pack as a backrest. 

Pooch joined him a short time later with his own MRE. 

“Man, I can’t wait to be back in a place where civilization exists because living off of MREs for a week is pretty close to my limit of how much of them I can stand,” commented the mechanic as he listlessly chewed his bread. 

Cougar nodded. The MREs might contain different meals and there was a variety of additional items to be had but that didn’t change the fact that taste-wise they left things to be desired. 

“So, want me to distract Clay and Roque so that you can sneak a call to Jensen?” 

Cougar shook his head at the offer. Sure he wouldn’t mind talking to Jensen but he could wait until the evening when the mission was hopefully done and they would call in their status anyway. 

A small part of him whispered that if Jensen was a bit more tired then maybe he would let some things slip. He firmly silenced that part. Not only was it very unlikely but he also didn’t want to exploit his friend’s potentially weakness like that. Secrets were meant to be shared with full consent; otherwise they lost part of their value. 

“Good for you, man,” replied Pooch with a big smile. 

It took Cougar a moment to make sense of it all. Pooch obviously believed that he was indeed ‘laying off the worry’ as the mechanic had called it in their previous conversation concerning Jensen. 

He wasn’t of course, but he also wasn’t about to tell that to Pooch, who seemed content to believe that he’d managed to influence Cougar’s own behavior in a way he’d deemed positive. And as long as Pooch believed that, he would see no reason to have another talk – something Cougar could definitively do without. 

That small part of him – it was definitively his most ruthless and asshole-ish side – piped up once more to add that if something did actually happen to Jensen Pooch would feel guilty about trying to placate his worry and would think twice about ever doing it again. 

Not that even that side of him actually wanted to see Jensen hurt in any way, because that was inacceptable, but if it were to happen it was willing to gain at least _something_ out of it. Even if it was detrimental to his other teammates. 

Cougar tried to remember when the last time was that he had to silence it so often in such a short span. Shortly after he’d first joined the Losers? That seemed about right. 

Pooch, Clay and Roque had made him care about people again causing him to cut back on the uncharitable thoughts he had about his fellow humans that had practically been a running commentary in the back of his mind. 

And then Jensen had joined them, taking up the space besides him with an air of naturalness that still left Cougar stunned at times and filling up all the silences until there were only few thoughts left in him that didn’t involve the hacker in some way, shape or form. And with Jensen occupying most, if not all of his thoughts at any given point in time his ruthless side did have a hard time to make itself heard. 

This of course didn’t mean that he never had any uncharitable thoughts about Jensen himself, but even those often had an exasperated if not fond tint to them. 

Finishing up his meal he put everything back into the outer packing and shoved it into his bag. Next he slithered down until he was properly reclined and pulled his hat over his face. 

His actions earned him a snort from Pooch, but other than that the mechanic remained silent as he ate. 

“Well, I’m off. See you at the rendezvous point,” said Pooch as he, judging by the sounds, got up. 

Cougar didn’t bother with a reply. He after all would see Pooch sooner. Even if it was only through his scope and not in person. 

With the sun shining down on him and the comforting sounds of Clay and Roque nearby Cougar easily slipped into a doze. 

Since he wasn’t actually sleeping he returned to full consciousness as soon as someone came near him some time later. 

“Cougar,” said Clay, “it’s time for you to get ready and set out.” 

Wordlessly Cougar sat up, tilted his hat back until it was again firmly settled on his head and gave his CO a confirming nod. Next he shrugged on his tactical vest and stood up. Once standing he closed it up, making sure that it was securely wrapped around his torso without restricting his movement or breathing. He loosened his scarf temporarily to get his comm in place before looping it back in place. After one quick pat down to ensure that everything was in place he shouldered his rifle and went over to where Roque was sitting with his ankle elevated. 

“The explosive?” Cougar asked of their demolition expert. 

“Here you go. Couldn’t make it sticky unfortunately so you’ll have to throw it somewhere in the vehicle where it won’t be in danger of falling out. 

“Try to call it in once you’ve done it or if it’s impossible. Hopefully one of us will be in range by then. If not call it in when you’re in your nest. From there you should be able to contact at least me.” 

Cougar nodded his understanding and stowed the small bomb away. 

Tipping his hat in farewell first at Roque and then at Clay, he strode out of the camp to make his way to the road. Once he had reached it he climbed into a tree that afforded him a good look and stood near a bent. 

If all went well the vehicle would be a transporter of some kind and would need to slow down to take the bent safely, giving Cougar enough time to make a good throw. After all he only had the one try. 

And if the best case wasn’t happening? Well, then he had at least enough of a warning to be able to switch positions to something more appropriate. 

Hours passed while he sat unmoving in his tree just waiting for his target. 

In the approaching dust the headlights were just visible enough to give him an extra warning that two vehicles were coming towards his position. 

The first one was the Jeep that had been missing from the compound this morning. The second one was an old pick-up, whose truck bed was covered by a canvas. At least for the most part. 

The sight of those uncovered inches just behind the driver’s cab made him give a sharp smile. Sure, the throw would be a bit more difficult but chances were, that they wouldn’t notice the explosive there until they’d nearly finished the unloading – giving the Losers plenty of time to hopefully be able to confirm the contends of the shipment. 

Making sure his rifle was secure Cougar cautiously slithered down the branch he was on so that he was closer to the road. 

Once he was in the position he deemed the best possible one, he carefully extracted the explosive from his pocket and prepared to throw it. 

Automatically he slowed his breathing and narrowed down his focus. Nothing mattered beyond those few open inches and his goal to make a perfect throw. 

The jeep passed by his position the guards not bothering to look up and barely slowing down before they took the turn. 

One heartbeat. 

Two – the pick-up was drawing up now. 

Three – they were slowing down. 

Hold your breath. 

Four – they were in the perfect spot. 

Throw and breathe out. 

Cougar watched in satisfaction as his aim was true and the explosive disappeared into the gap without disturbing the canvas. If there was a sound the sounds of the engine drowned it out. 

He stayed in position until both vehicles had left the bend and were speeding up again. They obviously hadn’t noticed anything. 

Returning to the trunk, where his perch wasn’t quite as precarious, he first took his rifle up again before activating his comm. 

“Anybody copy?” 

Static was his only answer. He thought he heard some snippets of what may have been words but nothing concrete. Clearly he was either just on the edge of being out of range for the others or he was picking up some interference. 

Instead of wasting more time by trying again, he switched his comm off again, quickly climbed down his tree and took off at a steady jog towards his nest. 

If the convoy kept his current speed and he didn’t have any hold ups, he would arrive at his nest shortly after the convoy had reached the compound. Those few minutes shouldn’t be any problem since they needed to confirm the goods first before they could move in. 

By the time he reached his nest his shirt clung to him beneath the tactical vest. 

Switching his comm back on he asked, “Gerber, you copy?” while getting his rifle set up. 

~Yeah. You good?~ answered Roque after a second. 

“Sí. Delivery successful. Am in position.” 

~Good. So are we. 

~Wait for my mark.~ 

Cougar already had the guard’s walkway in his sight. A quick sweep up and down revealed a pair of guards just turning off of this section. His previous scouting had shown that the next pair would enter just about… now. 

He followed his potential targets as they ambled along. They were relaxed. Their gait unhurried. Their focus was more directed on the inside the compound than on their surroundings. The arrival of the convoy was clearly something positive for them and maybe even held the promise of a party later. Or at the ver- 

~Mission is a go! 

~Detonation in 10… 9…~ 

“Wall cleared,” announced Cougar who’d taken his first shot right after Roque had finished the ‘go’. The second one had followed immediately after he’d adjusted his aim to the other guard. 

He saw Pooch and Clay approach the wall before retreating again a few moments later. Their charges were in place. 

~2… 1… Now!~ finished Roque his countdown. 

Nearly simultaneously the sound of both explosions filled the air. In their wake the cries of surprise, hurt, confusion and alarm followed as the compound came alive with frantic movement. 

Cougar surveyed the area around Pooch and Clay as they moved towards the buildings – making sure that no one could sneak up on them and shoot them from a blind spot. 

Once his teammates had entered a building he switched his focus, if possible, to their probable exit to make sure it was clear. If he couldn’t cover the exit he searched and took out targets to keep their enemies from being able to collect themselves and implement a successful defense. 

~All charges set. We’re leaving through entry point. 

~Detonation in four. Support maintain position until after. We’ll stay close too,~ declared Clay at some later point of time. 

~Route clear,~ answered Cougar after a short sweep of the area. 

Seconds later Clay and Pooch reentered his field of vision and after Cougar looked them over quickly – no obvious injury to be seen, movements smooth – he returned to covering his side of the compound and taking out enemies as he saw fit. Better to die of a clean shot than in an explosion. 

The next few minutes seemed to crawl by. 

~Detonation should be any moment now.~ 

Clay’s update caused Cougar to take his eye from his sight; it wasn’t a good idea to watch an explosion through it. Especially not a big one. 

It was a magnificent one. Judging from Pooch’s whoop of joy, Clay’s ‘Outstanding’ and Roque’s self-satisfied chuckle the others agreed with his opinion. 

~Okay. Pack up and head to rendezvous,~ ordered Clay a moment later. 

Cougar didn’t need to be told twice. He’d have to hurry as it was, since the rendezvous point was near Roque’s position, to keep him from straining his ankle as much as possible. 

Unsurprisingly he was the last to arrive and with only a few seconds to spare. 

He’d barely settled in his seat before Pooch took off. 

Roque, who sat next to him, offered him a hand and Cougar slapped it with his own. 

Twenty minutes later Pooch slowed down to a more reasonable speed and started looking around for a camping spot. 

When he had found a place and had cut the engine off, Clay spoke up. 

“Pooch, Cougar do a quick sweep of our surrounding. Roque and I’ll set out the bedrolls. Jensen said that there shouldn’t be any rain tonight, but I’ll ask him to confirm it again. 

“We’ll talk watch shifts when we know that the perimeter is secure.” 

With those words Clay opened his door, clearly thinking that nothing further needed to be said. 

Therefore Cougar turned to Roque and asked, “Wait with the check-in?” 

“Sure,” replied Roque with a snort. “I can make sure you get a chance to gossip with Jensen.” 

“Gracias,” answered Cougar and climbed out of the car. 

“You left, I right?” questioned Pooch when he joined him in front of the car. 

Cougar nodded his agreement and set out. 

Ten minutes he returned to find their sleeping rolls laid out with an MRE on top of each one and Roque talking to Jensen, while sitting half inside the car. 

“-sure there will be no surprise storms?” 

~There is not a single storm cloud anywhere to be seen. Well at least not anywhere near where you are. And there would need to be a very, very drastic change to get one near your position from what I’m seeing. 

~And it’s really kind of depressing that I have spend so much time staring at weather cards that I now have enough of an understanding of them that I can judge that, because they still aren’t interesting.~ 

While Jensen was still talking, Roque wordlessly held out the mic. He was obviously through with listening to the blond now that Cougar was back. 

Cougar took it with another grateful nod and settled in to listen to Jensen until he noticed that his audience had changed. Which unsurprisingly wasn’t that long given Jensen’s previous rants about flavored silences. 

~And you know that I will… 

~Hey wait a second! Why am I talking to you now? I was in the middle of a conversation! You can’t just stealthily hijack a conversation. That’s rude. 

~And if you didn’t hijack it and it was instead foisted on you, then it’s still rude on both of your parts. 

~Oh! I heard congratulations are in order and that I missed a really sweet boom.~ 

“Sí,” agreed Cougar and continued right away since he didn’t know how long Clay would allow them to talk, “we’ll be back tomorrow. Will you be fine?” 

~Gerber told me already. He didn’t give me an ETA though. Which would be the really useful information. 

~And of course I’ll be fine. Why wouldn’t I be? 

~I even promise that I will dismantle all my puppets and to not burn this shack down until you reach it. 

~Wait. That came out wrong. Because, granted, I was tempted to do so at times just to shake things up a bit and it’ll be too soon if I never see it again after we leave it, but I don’t actually plan to burn it down. At any point of time. Even though it would be the perfect way to ensure that I will never ever have to see it again. 

~And if it ever happens I’ll definitively cheer about it, but yeah, not planning to be the reason for it. 

~Anyways, do I have to do the whole ‘I did this and this since we last talked’-spiel again? Or is it sufficient if I tell you that I ate and slept an appropriate amount for the time that passed since yesterday afternoon? 

~Because I totally ate four meals and slept for like six hours or so. And apart from that there really is nothing much to tell. 

~And I don’t want to get in trouble with our Head Honcho again. By the way, don’t even think that you’re in the clear for not warning me yet, because you could have and you didn’t so I’m totally in the right being cross with you. 

~I’m not sure what it’ll cost you to get back into my good graces but make no mistake – I will collect on it. Just as soon as I’ve come up with a good prize. 

~After all the punishment must fit the crime. And since it’s very unlikely that I can withhold a warning from you I have to find an alternative. 

~So judging by the amused an undemanding flavor of your silence, I’m assuming that you don’t need a more detailed report on my past day and that it’s okay to end this now, because you just finished a mission and should get some rest. 

~Nighty-night and I’ll hopefully see you tomorrow. And if for some reason that becomes impossible call me immediately, okay? 

~Lazybones out.~ 

" _Buenas noches_ ," replied Cougar with fondness before putting the mic down and exiting the car. 

Closing the door behind him he made his way over to his bedroll and the MRE that was set out on it. He picked it up, tore the packing open and started to eat. 

“Jensen doing okay?” asked Pooch from his own sleeping roll. 

Since Cougar had his mouth full he simply gave a thumbs-up. For now the blond seemed to genuinely be okay. 

Jensen had been calm throughout their conversation and nothing had really tripped Cougar’s internal alarms so maybe everything would be okay. It almost seemed anti-climatic after all the worrying he’d done over the last week. Nearly too good to be true. 

However they had caught a break today and the entire mission had gone off without a hitch so maybe there was some hope for tomorrow going equally fine. 

Even Jensen’s last remark about calling him immediately hadn’t caused him any worry because it was well within the tech’s normal behavior and hadn’t been laced with that quiet pleading as his previous request to hurry. 

Was Jensen’s buffer bigger than he’d guessed? Or was the certainty that he’d be seeing them shortly enough to stave off any ill consequences? Or maybe – Clay’s voice ripped him from his thoughts. 

“Okay Losers. We basically have two options for tomorrow. We either hurry and make it to the relay-station in the late afternoon and try to get an evac for that evening of we take things slowly, get there in the evening, call in for an evac for the next morning and spend another night at the station. 

“Thoughts?” 

“Hurry,” answered Cougar immediately. The earlier they got to Jensen the better. 

“I second that,” agreed Pooch. “The less MREs the Pooch has to eat the better.” 

“My ankle feels somewhat better but I’d still prefer to have an official opinion on it,” said Roque matter-of-factly. 

“Well that’s that then. 

“Concerning guard shifts, I’d say Pooch goes first, since he’ll have to drive tomorrow. Then Roque, me and finally Coug. 

“Since it’s already past 2200 I’d say Pooch and me both take two hours each, Roque one and Cougar one and a half. That agreeable?” 

All of them signaled their consent. 

“Good. Then get ready to sleep,” With these words Clay dismissed their gathering. 

Cougar first left the camping grounds to follow nature’s call before taking advantage of having a vehicle by retreating into the backseat to change out of his sweaty clothing. Afterwards he slipped into his bedroll and was asleep nearly as soon as he’d pulled his hat over his eyes. 

 

### Day 7

Roque shaking his shoulder woke him the next day. Followed by a gruff, “You awake?” 

“Sí,” he answered as he sat up. 

“All was quiet. See you later, man,” said Roque before he retreated to his own sleeping roll. 

Cougar got up and left for the perimeter of the camp where he spent his shift. Once his 90 minutes were over he reentered it and started to wake the others up. 

They all made quick work off their breakfast and morning rituals, eager to get back to civilization. 

“Pooch,” directed Clay as soon as they all were settled back in the car, “take us to the point nearest the relay-station where we checked for vehicles on the way in. We’ll ditch the car there and wake the rest.” 

“You got it, Boss,” answered Pooch and started the car. 

The drive itself was uneventful. They made a quick stop around midday to refill the tank from a canister and to give all of them the chance to eat something and stretch their legs for a bit. 

Mid-afternoon Pooch deposited them and all of their gear at a spot near their intended goal, from which Cougar could provide cover, and went alone to wipe down and dump the car. 

They were all in a good mood throughout the trek back, simply because there was now a definite end in sight. 

That changed the moment they were able to lay eyes on the relay-station. There was a helicopter sat down not far from it and people moving around. 

Without a thought Cougar broke out into a run. Clay was yelling something behind him but he didn’t pay any attention. There was only one reason a medevac would be here right now. And it wasn’t because of Roque’s ankle. 

_Something had happened with Jensen._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffhanger. 
> 
> I'll try to get the next chapter finished asap but real live is keeping me busy right now. Having learned my lesson about estimating chapter growth, I won't make any promises this time around about when you can expect it.
> 
>  
> 
> GemlhKnight, sorry that you'll have to wait a bit longer for those clues I promised you. I hope you enjoyed this chapter anyways.


	5. Conclusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been quite a while, since the last chapter and I apologize, especially since I left you with that cliffhanger but I hope the following 22k words make up for it and manage to sweeten the new year for some.
> 
> I still don't have a beta, so if you see any mistakes please take the time to point them out to me. Other than that I still don't know anything about the military, hospitalisation and Spanish and I don't own the right to any of the real things that show up in this chapter.
> 
>  **Warnings** : hospital setting and all it implies 
> 
> Language key:  
> ~blah~ transmissions, calls
> 
> Translations for all readers on mobile devices:  
> Soy yo = It's me  
> Lo prometo = I promise  
> De nada = You're welcome  
> Cálmate = Calm down  
> Bien hecho = Well done
> 
> Everyone else just hover over the italics.

## Conclusion

Cougar reached the hut just as a stretcher was carried out. Headless of the startled gazes he received, he reached out with his right hand to check Jensen’s pulse. Glad that his gloves missed the cap of his trigger finger since it enabled him to easily feel the strong beating of his friend’s heart beneath his warm skin. 

A quick sweeping glance up and down Jensen’s body revealed nothing amiss but a slightly bloody band-aid near his hairline. 

“What happened?” he demanded from the medics, who obviously still weren’t sure what they should make of him. 

“It’s alright,” came Clay’s voice from behind him, the same time as a heavy hand landed on his shoulder, “we’re Corporal Jensen’s teammates. I’m his CO and this is our medic. Could you tell us why he called you here?” 

“He contacted base around fifty minutes ago, saying that he was feeling unwell but that he was expecting his team back soon and that he hoped to hold out until then. He must have gotten up and consequently lost his consciousness because base was unable to get anything more from him after they heard a thud through the line. Sir,” explained the one whose tag read ‘Graham’. 

“Thank you. 

“Cougar go with them. Send a regular evac for us once you reach base. We’ll pack Jensen’s gear. 

“Now go.” 

“Sir!” replied the medics and started moving again. 

Cougar latched onto the side of the stretcher and followed along. 

Once they were safely seated in the helicopter and Jensen had been connected to both oxygen and EKG Cougar wrapped his hand around his friend’s wrist to feel his pulse beating beneath his fingertips. He did it because while it was reassuring to see the steady pulse in form of the spikes the green line made, being in a chopper meant that the level of ambient noise was much too high for a practical usage of the sound function and he needed some additional reassurance. 

With his free hand he slipped Jensen’s glasses from his nose, folded them up and stored them safely away in one of his pockets. He knew that normally nobody would take away someone else’s glasses but Jensen’s were NSI and there would always be people out there who thought that such things ware unacceptable. Therefore it was simply better not to risk it. 

He also answered the paramedics questions – No, Jensen hadn’t mentioned feeling different or ill during any of their check-ins or shown any signs of illness before they split. No, as far as he knew Jensen had never fainted without a recognizable cause before, but he could call his family to see if they knew something. No, he also didn’t have any chronic conditions that could have been the reason for his collapse. Yes, according to Jensen he’d been eating regularly and sleeping an appropriate amount. He could ask the others to check the amount of empty MREs to verify at least the first part of it. According to Jensen he’d also been doing his PE. No, Jensen wasn’t allergic to anything. 

The most worrying thing was that Jensen showed no signs of regaining consciousness even though his vitals were all okay and the head wound seemed to be superficial. In light of this, it was decided that they’d rush Jensen to the medical facilities in order to perform a CT-scan on his head and to additionally take a blood sample to run tests on. 

Cougar would have liked to stay with Jensen but since he wouldn’t be allowed in the CT-chamber anyway he resigned himself to take care of the administrative things first. As such he reported in, requested the evac for the rest of the Losers, housing on base while Jensen was a patient, usage of their radio equipment to update Clay and access to a phone from which he could call a civilian. 

He got an escort, who first showed him to the communication center where he asked one of the workers to connect him with the relay-station. 

Shortly after he was passed a headset. 

“ _Soy yo_.” 

~So what’s the word?~ answered Clay. 

“Inconclusive. They’re doing a CT-scan and blood tests. Can you count the empty MRE packagings?” 

~Sure. Give us a sec. 

~When’s the evac coming?~ 

“1800-1830 where we got dropped off. They’ll call when the helicopter takes off from here.” 

~Okay, we’ve got Lazybone’s gear packed. 

~You told them about Gerber’s ankle?~ 

“Sí. There will be transport waiting for him.” 

~Good. 

~The number of empty MREs checks out for three meals a day. So there’s that at least. 

~Anything else?~ 

“We’ll be housed in the barracks for the time being.” 

~That was to be expected. 

~Was that all?~ 

“Sí.” 

~Honcho out.~ 

Cougar returned the headset to its owner with a quick ‘Gracias’ – after all it never hurt to be cordial to the staff – and returned to his escort, who was waiting for him at the entrance. 

Their next stop was a public phone from which he could call Jensen’s sister. He entered the number from memory – all of them made the effort to remember each other’s family contacts just in case – before listening to the ringing tone. 

~Jensen residence,~ came the answer shortly after. 

“Hola,” he greeted back with a dry mouth. 

~Cougar. What can I do for you?~ 

He could hear how she forced herself not to jump to the worst conclusion immediately and it did nothing to assuage his guilt. 

“Information. Jensen collapsed with no obvious reason. He has a head wound and hasn’t woken up yet. Has something like this ever happened before?” he explained as calmly as he could. 

~So, if the head wound isn’t the reason he collapsed how did he get it?~ 

“Probably during his fall.” 

~You don’t know?~ 

“He was alone,” admitted Cougar and it felt like a personal failure on his part. 

~I see. 

~Well I’m sorry to say that Jake never just collapsed, so I’m afraid I can’t help you. 

~But it’s Jake, so don’t worry too much. He’ll probably wake up tomorrow, just in time for lunch. You know how he is. And if he does, tell him to call me so that I can yell at him for making you worry.~ The last part was obviously tacked on to lighten the mood. Cougar could certainly appreciate the effort. 

For a moment he thought about asking her if she knew anything about Jensen’s need for human interaction but in the end decided against it. 

“I will,” he answered simply. 

~Thanks. 

~And remember that you promised to stop by the next time you have leave so that I can finally meet you in person.~ 

Here was another reminder how fresh his friendship with Jensen still was. Oh, on Jensen’s insistence they’d talked and skyped with each other plenty of times, but he’d never actually managed to visit her yet. 

“ _Lo prometo_.” 

~I’m looking forward to it. 

~Bye then.~ 

“Adíos,” he replied before putting the receiver down. 

With that done he asked his escort to show him to the barracks so that he could put his gear down and take a shower. He also asked him for the directions for the medical facilities so that he could go there afterwards. 

After a week of quick washes when an opportunity presented itself the hot shower felt heavenly, even if he kept it short, as did the wet shave. 

Finished with his hygiene he slipped into fresh underwear, socks and shirt and pulled on his least dirty uniform pants. Finally he first extracted his cowboy hat from his pack, putting it on after giving it an once-over, and then made sure that he had Jensen’s glasses on his person. 

For a moment he contemplated whether he should clean his rifle first or head directly to the medical facility. In the end getting back to Jensen was more important to him. And since he would be most probably be kicked out of Jensen’s room at one point or another in the evening he would have enough time to strip it down then. The ideal solution would have been to take his rifle with him and clean it at Jensen’s bedside, but unfortunately doing so was frowned upon by medical personal and he had no intentions to disgruntle the staff in charge of Jensen’s health. 

Following the direction he had received earlier he had no problems making his way to the medical facilities. When he asked the receptionist after Jensen though, he was told that he would have to wait since Jensen hadn’t been assigned a room yet. 

Since he was in no mood to simply sit around he asked for the directions to the nearest place where he could find some food. 

He returned 45 minutes later with a full stomach and this time he not only received a room number but also instructions to check in at the nurses’ station to answer some additional questions. 

Tipping his hat at the receptionist he made his way up and deeper into the complex until he reached his destination. He gave the nurse, who manned the station, a charming smile along with his name and his wish to see Jensen. 

She blushed slightly and told him to go ahead and that she would direct the doctor in charge to him at the first chance. 

In return he made sure to make his smile soft and grateful to match his spoken ‘Gracias’ before turning away and striding quickly to Jensen’s room. 

And even though everything in him screamed at him to directly go to Jensen’s side as soon as he’d crossed the threshold he took the time to survey the space first. 

It was a standard two-bed room with Jensen as its sole occupant, whose bed was next to a big window. Immediately to his right there was another door which led to a small, empty bathroom. Crossing the room he checked the sightlines from the window and only when he’d satisfied that need did he turn to his friend. 

Jensen was stretched out on his back, wearing a short-sleeved hospital gown, with his blanket pulled up to mid-chest and both arms resting on top of it. He was attached to an EGK, this time with sound and the steady beeping was reassuring, oxygen and an IV. A quick check revealed that the bag with still almost full, prove that it had been connected not too long ago, and containing a simple saline solution to prevent dehydration. The band-aid on his head had been replaced by a simple butterfly bandage to hold it close, showing off the bruise that was already partially formed around the thankfully small gash. It would look really impressive tomorrow when the blood had had enough time to really settle in the tissue. 

Although the EKG was still producing steady sounds, standing here directly next to Jensen Cougar was unable to stop himself from reaching out and placing his fingers against the underside of the blond’s jaw to feel the pulse beating there for himself. 

He stood there for a few long moments before he could force himself to step back, grab one of the two chairs that were placed by a small table, drag it into the corner next to Jensen’s head that would allow him to both see through the window and keep at least rhe end of the short hallway in his sight. 

However even as he sat there his fingers tingled with the wish to feel Jensen’s skin under them again and his bare forearms seemed to practically taunt him. 

Cougar wondered if that was how Jensen felt all the time, if that was the reason he constantly sought out contact to others. 

Ruefully he shook his head. Obviously he was more drained than he’d thought if he was entertaining such flights of fancy. 

He was rescued from further going down that particularly road by the opening of the room’s door and the subsequent appearance of a doctor. 

Even as Cougar stood up to greet her, he took in and analyzed everything about her. 

She was about his height, probably in her mid-forties with gray streaking through her brown hair, which was pulled back in a simple knot and with a stern expression but kind brown eyes. In one hand she held a clipboard. Her nametag identified her as ‘Doctor Ewing’. 

“Good evening. My name is Doctor Ewing and I’m in charge of Corporal Jensen’s treatment. I assume you are his teammate?” 

“Yes,” he replied, making sure to stick to English since some people reacted negatively to his Spanish especially in official capacities. They often took it as a sign that he wasn’t truly American and as such not as deserving of their regard as others. And with the rest of the Losers not here yet and Jensen out of commission it was not a risk he was willing to take. Especially since the worst case scenario was that if the doctor looked down on him she could expand her negative attitude to include Jensen. 

He didn’t actually think that that would be a problem with Doctor Ewing but sometimes prejudice was hidden deep and it was always better to be safe than sorry. 

“The report from the flight paramedics lists you simply as ‘Cougar’ but you checked in as ‘Alvarez’ at the nurses’ station. Any name preferences?” 

“Cougar, please,” he requested, pleasantly surprised. Few took the time to ask after such things and simply went with the surname. 

“Very well. 

“It further states here, that you were going to contact both your team and Corporal Jensen’s family to make some enquiries. And while the nurse manning the station should have made you answer these already, for some reason she didn’t,” here Doctor Ewing shot him a look that clearly said that she had her suspicions as to why the questions had remained unanswered, causing Cougar to give her a blank look in return. 

“There are enough empty MREs for him to have eaten three meals a day. His family didn’t have any further information,” he reported evenly. 

“I see,” she said and jotted it down. 

“Well, unfortunately we haven’t found any reason for Corporal Jensen’s continued unconsciousness or collapse either, yet. All test results are normal so far. We’ll proceed to run a few more uncommon tests but if these don’t show anything we’ll have to assume the cause to be psychological. In that case there will be nothing to be done but transfer him to a long-term ward and hope that he wakes up on his own. 

“For now he doesn’t have a catheter and I’d like to wait as long as possible before inserting one. 

“Any questions so far?” 

Cougar shook his head in response. 

“Good. 

“Visiting hours end at 9 p.m. and start at 7 a.m.. Since we’re the general ward here and there is no other patient in here I will not restrict the amount of visitors for now. 

“I’ll be back in about two hours or so. If anything changes don’t hesitate to call for the nurses.” 

“I understand. Thank you, Doctor Ewing.” 

She gave him an acknowledging nod before turning and exiting the room. 

Alone again, he sank back into his chair and resumed his vigil. 

The third time he caught himself staring at Jensen’s bare arm, he heaved an internal sigh and decided to give in to his urge to rest his hand on his friend’s arm. After all he was alone in here and since Doctor Ewing had closed the door again when she left he’d have plenty of warning if someone chose to come in. And obviously this urge wasn’t going away any time soon and he’d rather satisfy it and be able to fully concentrate on his surroundings instead of being constantly distracted by it. 

Furthermore, and maybe that was the reason for this urge in the first place, he couldn’t get Jensen’s pleading to come back to him in time out of his head, because ‘come back to me’ seamlessly transformed into ‘don’t leave me alone’ and from there to ‘I need human contact’ and while Cougar didn’t know how aware Jensen was at the moment touching him was an easy way to communicate ‘I’m here’, ‘you’re not alone’ and ‘I/we came back for you’. 

And maybe it couldn’t appease his guilt – nothing short of Jensen waking up and being okay would be able to manage that – but it could act as a reassurance and an apology for not actually making it back until it was too late. 

Of course he had no actual proof that Jensen had collapsed because he’d been alone for too long. However the timing plus all the hints the blond had dropped painted a pretty conclusive and damming picture. 

It might not make much sense and it certainly wasn’t a theory he was willing to voice out loud, but since Jensen and rationality had a very loose relationship to begin with he was confident in his reasoning and conclusion. 

He just hoped that no lasting damage had been inflicted on Jensen because of it. Not that he really knew what ‘it’ precisely entailed and unfortunately it was unlikely that he’d get an explanation any time soon. So all he had was the knowledge that Jensen knew about it, that it was capable of rendering the blond unconscious and keep him like that and that it didn’t show up in any common tests as well as the hope, and he prayed to Dios that it was true, that Jensen would have been intelligent enough and in possession of enough self-preservation not to risk any permanent consequences to himself. 

On the other hand it wasn’t like Cougar hadn’t questioned both of these traits repeatedly since he had met Jensen… 

Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly he banished those thoughts. Nothing would be accomplished by them and he was already worried as it was. No need to add to it. He’d just continue to hope and pray for the best and leave it at that. It was better to focus on the possible positive outcome than on the things that could have negatively influenced everything from the start, because the first on could at least potentially do Jensen some good while the last was just borrowing trouble. 

The reopening of the door provided a welcome distraction from his bleak thoughts. Retracting his hand he took a quick glance at his watch and frowned. It was too early for Doctor Ewing to be back yet. 

The tension that had started to built up in his muscles eased when the visitor reached the end of the hallway and he saw that it was Clay, still in the same clothing and unwashed, standing there. 

“Boss,” he greeted. 

“Cougar,” replied Clay and stepped up to the bed. “Anything new?” 

Cougar just shook his head. 

Clay heaved a heavy sigh. “Well, Roque’s downstairs getting his ankle x-rayed. They weren’t impressed to learn that he kept using it for three days even if we tried to keep the strain to a minimum. If we’re lucky all he’ll get is a pair of crutches and an order for a few days of rest. 

“In any case I can probably pick him up in half an hour or so and follow Pooch to the barracks. 

“Speaking of, Pooch will probably be by as soon as he’s showered and found something to eat.” 

Cougar nodded. He hadn’t really expected anything else. 

“Okay, so who’s in charge of this idiot here?” 

“Doctor Ewing.” 

“Any good?” asked Clay next and Cougar knew that he was also asking if she’d given him any trouble. Clay was protective of them like this. 

“She seems competent,” he answered to assuage those worries. 

“High praise. 

“Well, I’ll see if I can track her down before I’ve got to go back for Roque. You keep on watching out over our youngster, because although he shouldn’t be able to get into _any more_ trouble, I also thought that he’d be safe at the station and look how that turned out,” the last part was grumbled. Oh yes, Clay was definitely not happy about being blindsided by Jensen collapsing. 

Cougar gave a serious nod. Of course he would be keeping an eye on Jensen. Doing anything else would just be wrong. 

“Good. 

“I plan to hit the hay as soon as I’ve had a shower and something to eat, so I’ll probably see you again in the morning,” said Clay and after one last long glance at Jensen turned and left the room. 

Laying his hand on Jensen’s arm again he roughly calculated how long it would be until Pooch joined him. 

Since Clay and Roque had probably come here immediately from the landing place, Pooch had likely gotten a ride to the barracks along with their gear because four packs and a field radio were too much to carry for one man. 

Afterwards he would have stored everything and then taken about 40 to 50 minutes for himself to get washed up and something to eat. 

So all in all he’d need about an hour before arriving here. 

Now Cougar may not know when exactly the evac would have dropped the rest of the team off – sometime between1845 and 1915 based on the times he’d been given – but he knew that it would have taken probably about half an hour before Roque would have actually gotten taken for his x-rays and subsequently leaving Clay free to come and find him here. 

With some added travelling time that meant that Pooch would likely join him in about 20 to 25 minutes. 

Hopefully he would remember to bring some clothing for Jensen to change into. 

Which in turn reminded Cougar of the fact, that he’d neglected to check the closet and nightstands and that he was still carrying Jensen’s glasses in his pocket. 

Shaking his head ruefully at Jensen’s ability to absorb all of his attention – he hadn’t known that it also worked while the blond was unconscious – and his somewhat bad habit to not fight that draw nearly as much as he should, he stood up to complete the check of the room. 

The nightstand next to the free bed was, as expected, empty. 

In the closet he found Jensen’s shoes and a bag that contained his clothing. A quick check revealed that his boxers were not included and that thankfully nothing had been cut off. It might not have been one of his printed shirts, Jensen had a stack of plain ones especially for missions so that if one got destroyed it wouldn’t matter quite as much, but he’d still complain and grouse about it. If for no other reason that the shirt had still been perfectly intact and cutting it off would have been such a waste and now he would have to get a new one and it wouldn’t be worn in and therefore much more uncomfortable. 

And clearly Cougar had spent far too much time actually listening to Jensen to be able to imagine this exact wording. However it didn’t stop there either, because it wasn’t just the words he could envision clear as day in his mind but also the exact tone of voice as well as the accompanying facial expressions and gestures. 

Stuffing everything back into the bag and placing it on the shelves again, he closed the closet door and turned towards the nightstand next to Jensen’s bed. 

Inside Cougar found the expected paraphernalia that Jensen called the content of his pockets as well as his watch. Extracting the glasses from his own pocket he placed them next to it before returning to his seat. 

Once he’d settled down again in the most comfortable position he could find – he might be used to spending hours in one position regardless of how comfortable it was but that didn’t mean he had to deliberately forego it in any other situation – while still being able to see everything he wanted to keep an eye on, he replaced his hand on Jensen’s arm. 

This time he didn’t even have the time to sink back into his thoughts before the door opened again and he had to remove his hand. 

At least this time he knew who was about to enter because Roque was swearing up a storm until he finally managed to maneuver his way into the room. 

The SIC had a crutch beneath each arm and his boot was unlaced and his foot held in a way that meant he had some sort of brace on. 

Cougar nodded in greeting and raised an inquiring eyebrow. 

“My ankle’s fine. They’re just a precaution the doctor deemed necessary, because apparently I don’t know my own fucking limits and don’t take my health serious enough,” explained Roque with a somewhat disgusted look on his face. 

None of them liked to have their judgment questioned and getting stuck with crutches always sucked, so Cougar just nodded again and let the matter drop. 

“They figured out what’s wrong with Jensen yet?” 

Regretfully Cougar shook his head. 

“Figures. 

“Any idea when he’s going to wake up so that he can explain himself?” 

Another headshake. 

“Great,” answered Roque, sarcasm heavy in his voice. 

Cougar thought that it was mostly a way for the other man to hide his worry. Not that he had any intention to tell that to Roque. 

Silence settled over them so that the only noise in the room was the steady beeping that the EGK gave off. 

This was the scene – Roque propped up half on his crutches and half leaning on the free side of the table and Cougar sitting in a chair by Jensen’s head, both of them silent and looking at the blond – that greeted Pooch when he entered the main part of the room. 

“Hey guys. Are we having a team meeting that no one told me about?” 

“No,” replied Roque, “I just had some time to kill before Clay would be back so I decided to drop by instead of sitting around doing nothing. I should probably head back down anyways, so I’ll see the two of you tomorrow.” With those words Roque turned and started to make his way towards the door. 

“How’s your ankle?” asked Pooch while stepping back to hold the door open. 

“It’s fine.” 

“That’s good. 

“Have a good night,” wished Pooch and clapped the taller male on the shoulder as he passed by. 

“Yeah, you too,” replied Roque before leaving. 

“It’s almost cute how he seems to think that we’d really fall for his excuse that he’s only here because he’d be bored otherwise, don’t you think Cougs?” commented Pooch after closing the door. 

As soon as he was able to see him again, Cougar gave a small smirk in response. 

“So I guess there is nothing new?” asked the mechanic next, while he was dragging the other chair across the room. When it was positioned to his satisfaction he chucked off his boots and lounged back in it with his feet propped up on the bed by Jensen’s shins. 

Cougar shook his head once the other was looking at him again. 

“Damn. And here I was hoping for some more good news.” 

Cougar shrugged minutely. Considering his own theory he was glad for every test that came up negative. 

“Anyways, I guess I owe you some kind of apology.” 

Cougar raised a questioning eyebrow when Pooch didn’t immediately continue. 

“Because I told you not to worry so much and seeing as Jensen’s lying in a hospital bed right now, you were obviously right about the worrying. Even if I have no idea how you knew. Or why the hell you didn’t say anything if you knew,” accusation and hurt were prominent in Pooch’s voice as he said that last sentence and his gaze was cutting. 

“I did not know,” denied Cougar sharply. 

He hadn’t known what would happen if they got back to late. Hadn’t even suspected that they’d come back to find Jensen unconscious. And he certainly wouldn’t have remained silent if that had been the case. He had suspected that something was up, yes, but he hadn’t _known_. 

“Okay,” conceded Pooch after a long moment were they stared at each other. After taking a deep breath and dragging a hand over his head, he continued, “I’m sorry. Again. You’re right. With the way you just took off when we saw that chopper there’s no way you knew. 

“But Coug, you can’t tell me that you had no idea at all, because you worried far too much for that.” 

Cougar admitted to that truth with a nod. 

“So you knew…?” 

“Nada,” completed Cougar the open question. 

Pooch groaned before asking, “But…?” while making ‘get on with it’-gestures. 

“I suspected.” 

Pause. Pooch was obviously waiting for him to expand his answer some more but Cougar had no plans to do so. 

“Oh come on. I’m not Jensen. You’ll have to give me something more than half a sentence,” complained Pooch as soon as he caught on to the fact that that was all he was getting. 

Cougar remained silent. 

“Okay. So you suspected something was up with Jensen. Right?” 

Cougar deigned to answer the question with a nod. 

“So something set you off.” 

Another nod. 

“And that something was…?” 

Cougar simply threw a pointed look at the still unconscious Jensen. 

“Really? He seemed pretty normal to me.” 

Cougar resisted rolling his eyes and just stayed silent. 

“But then again I’m not you. And not nearly as versed in Jensen as you are, so I’ll take your word for it. 

“To recap: Jensen somehow alerted you to the fact that there was something going on with him but since you didn’t know what exactly was going on you didn’t say anything to any of the rest of us and just worried a lot. 

“That about right?” 

Cougar nodded again. 

Just as Pooch was taking a breath to, presumably, continue his interrogation there was a perfunctory knock before the door opened and Doctor Ewing entered the room. 

Cougar stood and greeted her with her name – mostly for Pooch’s sake, who had mirrored his actions and was now standing too. 

“Cougar,” she greeted back before turning to Pooch and asking, “and you are?” 

“Pooch, ma’am. I’m another teammate of Jensen’s.” 

“A pleasure,” she replied without even a twitch at the nickname. 

“Unfortunately since there has been no new development as of yet, there will be a nurse stopping by shortly to collect another blood sample and to disconnect the current IV. Corporal Jensen will receive another bag of fluids in the morning if he hasn’t woken by then. At that point we will also insert a catheter and collect a urine sample for further tests. 

“I have already spoken to your CO about this, but I’m of the opinion that it’s best if all involved parties are in the possession of all information. So is there a member of your team that I haven’t spoken to yet?” 

“Our SIC, Roque. But he won’t be by again this evening and I’m sure Clay caught him up,” said Pooch. 

“I’ll try to catch him tomorrow then. 

“Do any of you have a question for now?” 

When booth of the Losers remained silent she continued, “In this case please remember that visiting hours end at 9 p.m. and to call the nurses if there are any changes in Corporal Jensen’s condition. 

“I assume I will see you again tomorrow but for now my shift is almost over and I still have some things to attend to, so goodbye.” 

“It was nice meeting you Doctor Ewing,” replied Pooch while Cougar nodded his own goodbye. 

As soon as the door was closed again Cougar sat down and tilted his hat down to show that he was in no mood for any further questions and wouldn’t answer them even if they were asked. Not that there really was anything left to be talked about. Pooch now had all the facts, the rest was conjecture on Cougar’s part or rooted in his connection with Jensen and he wasn’t willing to talk about either of those things. 

“Now would be a really great moment to wake up, Jensen, because Cougar is being tedious,” addressed Pooch the unconscious hacker, clearly surrendering in the face of Cougar’s unwillingness. 

It caused Cougar to smirk slightly behind the cover of his brim. 

However before the silence could fully settle itself over them the door reopened, causing Cougar to look up sharply at the entering nurse. 

Her nametag read ‘Morrow’ and she was clearly a no-nonsense kind of person because after a brisk greeting she proceeded to first disconnect the IV, leaving the needle in though, before collecting the blood sample and disappearing again. 

“Better not piss her off, or she’ll eat you alive,” commented Pooch once the door was firmly closed and they were alone again. 

Cougar nodded. That would definitively be a bad idea. 

He was just glad that she hadn’t manned the nurses’ station or he’d never been able to charm his way straight into Jensen’s room. 

They spend the rest of the visiting hours in companionable silence which was only broken by an odd comment here or there. 

Cougar should have known better than to assume that Pooch would let matters rest though, because as soon as they were outside and on their way back to the barracks the interrogation was continued. 

“So I know, you don’t really want to talk about it but, come on bro, give us at least some more answers because you weren’t the only one who got the bejesus scared out of him when we saw that chopper. Hell if Clay hadn’t told me to stay with Roque I’d have been right behind you.” 

There wasn’t really anything Cougar could do to deny the truth of that statement. Just because Jensen was his best friend and vice-versa didn’t mean that the others didn’t care about him too. 

And since he himself wanted to demand answers from Jensen, even if he wouldn’t actually do it, he couldn’t really fault Pooch for seeking some of his own. The quiet pleading in the other man’s voice showed clearly just how rattled Pooch was by all of this and made it impossible for Cougar to refuse the request. Even if all he was willing to do was answer a few questions – because he was still unwilling to provide any explanations. 

In the end he gave a curt nod to show his compliance. 

Pooch eyed him mistrustfully from the side as if he knew that there was a catch but unable to actually pinpoint it. 

“Okay, thanks,” he finally said clearly still a bit thrown but willing to get on with it now that he’d gotten his way. “So we covered the basics with the whole ‘Jensen set you off; you worried but didn’t actually know anything so you didn’t say anything’-thing. 

“But see, if _we_ noticed that you were as worried as you were, _Jensen_ must have noticed too, right?” 

Cougar nodded. The topic had come up the day it had only been Roque and him in the camp so Pooch had no way of knowing about it. 

“And he didn’t try to ease your worry or something?” 

Cougar nodded again because Jensen had, they had each assured the other that they were fine, but since Cougar had been more worried about the future it hadn’t done all that much for his overall worry-levels. 

Pooch stared at him for a long moment, obviously trying to parse the implications of that and subsequently trying to decide what he should ask next. Finally he settled on, “But since you’re so adamant about not having known anything, I guess he didn’t give you an actual explanation?” 

Before Cougar could answer this question the next was already sprung at him. 

“Wait! Did you actually talk about what worried you?” 

He shook his head, earning himself an incredulous look. 

“Why the ever loving hell not?! Would that have been too easy, or what?” 

Cougar just shrugged his shoulders. He wasn’t about to explain that the topic was too private; that he didn’t have the right to ask after it. 

“I really don’t get you at times, you know that? 

“But anyways, even if you don’t know why Jensen collapsed, do you have any idea how we can maybe prevent it from happening again?” 

The question gave him pause. Was there something they could actually do? He’d been so caught up in the present he hadn’t really thought about the future. 

To show Pooch that he wasn’t simply dismissing the question he tilted his head a bit and gave a thoughtful hum. 

If his theory was right, then yes there was something they could do – to not leave Jensen alone again for a week. Or better yet, no longer than five days, because now that he thought about it he realized that he’d made a mistake yesterday. 

He hadn’t asked Jensen if he _was_ fine but whether he _would be_ fine. And Jensen might have answered with an affirmative but even though Cougar had asked with today in mind he had no way of knowing which point in time Jensen had been referring to. It had been a truly stupid thing to do, to ask such an open question because Jensen had obviously taken advantage of the wiggle room it provided to answer it honestly while still practically lying to Cougar. 

It also meant that Cougar didn’t actually know how Jensen had felt yesterday. Sure he had seemed fine but without a confirmation Cougar wasn’t willing to take this risk again, this time knowingly. 

Furthermore he had no idea if there were things that could influence Jensen’s buffer, one way or the other. 

So five days it was. 

Now all he had to do was explain it to Pooch. Preferably without making himself sound crazy. 

Luckily for him they were in the barracks already but not yet in their room. And even though Pooch seemed to have caught on to the fact that he had an answer there was no way they would have this conversation out in the open, least of all here in the corridor because the echo in here was fantastic. 

By the time they reached their shared room Cougar had hit upon a viable option, he wasn’t quite happy with it but it would have to do. 

Still Cougar didn’t speak up once they had entered and closed the door behind them, instead he picked up his rifle and his cleaning kit and retreated to the table. 

“Seriously? Do I have to drag every word out of you?” asked Pooch from where he’d stretched himself out on his bunk. “You obviously came up with some kind of idea. So let’s hear it.” 

“Jensen is not to be left alone for longer than five days.” 

Pooch stared. 

And stared some more. 

By the time he actually opened his mouth to say something Cougar had managed to break his rifle down completely. 

“Okay. What? Did I just hear you wrong or is your solution really that we inflict an allowance on Jensen for how much time he can spend on his own?” Pooch sounded incredibly baffled and was still staring at Cougar as thought he’d grown another head. 

“You’re actually serious. 

“Huh. 

“I don’t know what to think of you right now,” admitted Pooch after it became obvious that yes, Cougar had actually said that and no, he wasn’t planning on taking it back. 

“Can you tell me how you reached that solution?” asked Pooch next in a very careful tone of voice as if he was making sure to inflict no judgment into the question. 

“Did Clay tell you Jensen’s radio message?” countered Cougar. 

“Jensen’s message…? What does that have to do with anything?” 

Cougar just glared at him for a moment. 

“Okay, no questioning of your motives. Got it. 

“Clay didn’t really tell us much. Just that Jensen had called base, said that he wasn’t feeling well and then collapsed while on line with them.” 

“He also said that he hoped to be able to hold out until we returned,” added Cougar because that was the important point in this. 

“But he didn’t manage that. 

“So are you trying to tell me that Jensen is incredibly bad at judging his own limits?” 

Cougar shook his head. 

“If it’s not that though, that leaves us with what? Jensen thinking that we could do something? To stop him from collapsing? But if that’s true then why didn’t he just call us? We’d have hurried back if he’d told us he needed us there.” 

Cougar had nodded at the third question because they’d have put an end to Jensen’s isolation, given him whatever he got out of a social interaction, but had been forced to shrug at the fourth. He had no explanation for it either. 

“All right. So if you truly think that we’d have been able to change things if we’ have gotten there earlier, I can see how setting a time limit for the amount of time Jensen spends alone seems at least somewhat reasonable. But where do you get the five days from? Because he was still fine yesterday. So shouldn’t it be six days?” 

Cougar shrugged again. He wasn’t really keen on explaining his mistake until he absolutely had to. After all not only had he a reputation to uphold but it also wouldn’t be conducive if Pooch started doubting him now. 

“Or is this a case of better safe than sorry?” 

This time Cougar nodded because essentially that was the truth. 

“You know, for all that your worry was justified? It really doesn’t change the fact that you’re a worrywart when it comes to Jensen,” announced Pooch with way too much glee in his voice. 

Cougar just rolled his eyes. It wasn’t his fault Jensen set off his protective instinct so strongly. 

“Well, I’m glad we had this talk, but I’m about to fall asleep so I’ll get ready for bed,” said Pooch and stood up to do just that. 

Ten minutes later he was fast asleep. 

Cougar himself first finished cleaning his rifle before crawling beneath the covers of his own bunk. 

Unfortunately he found no rest. He would manage to relax enough to slip under but he would always wake up shortly after and end up lying there in the dark until he started to drift again. 

Finally he conceded defeat, got up, got dressed and left the room. 

Sneaking into Jensen’s room turned out to be no challenge at all and thankfully no one had moved his chair out of the corner so he could sink straight into it. 

Sitting here in the gloom of Jensen’s room with the steady beeping of the EKG in his ear and Jensen’s warm skin under his hand he felt much calmer than he had in the barracks. 

At some point of time he started tracing out patterns in a similar way Jensen tended to do it when he had the opportunity. It was even soothing to nearly the same degree. Maybe it was the familiarity of it? 

Cougar wasn’t sure how much more time had passed until a subtle shift occurred – nothing more but the faintest murmur, the slightest twitch of muscles, a fractional deeper breathe – but he knew without a doubt that Jensen had finally stopped being unconscious and started to sleep instead. 

The wave of relief that washed through him was enormous. 

However with his worries lessened other things started to creep up on him. Like his bone-deep tiredness. 

Since he knew that he needed the sleep and that he was way too comfortable here but couldn’t actually risk falling asleep lest he’d be found, he finally resolved to get up and head back to the barracks. 

Once standing he still had a hard time with actually leaving, though. Every time he was about to remove his hand from Jensen’s arm, to break the connection and therefore, the comfort he drew from it, his resolve faltered. 

With a soundless huff of annoyance he shifted until he was facing Jensen’s head, cupping his friend’s face with his free hand while simultaneously letting go of the arm. 

Just as he was about to stroke his hand through those blond tresses as a means to convey that Jensen was cared for and that Cougar would be back – the same way his mother used to do it when he’d been a child – blue eyes opened a slit. 

“Coug…?” came the familiar sleepy murmur. 

“Sí. Sleep,” he answered softly, while carding his hand through Jensen’s hair to sooth him back to sleep. 

“Mmm, ‘kay,” replied Jensen, his eyes already falling shut again. 

Cougar allowed himself the luxury of keeping up the motions of his hand until he was sure that Jensen was truly asleep once more. 

Afterwards he slipped out of the hospital room and ghosted through the base until he was back in his bunk. 

This time he managed to fall asleep quick and easily. 

* * *

The next morning Cougar woke when Roque entered his and Pooch’s room to drag them off to breakfast. And even though he hadn’t gotten that much sleep he still felt rested. 

Throughout breakfast in the mess hall Cougar could feel the curious gazes they attracted with their non-regulation appearance from the base personnel; it was a common occurrence whenever they weren’t in their home base so he didn’t pay it too much mind. 

The mood at their table was rather bleak and conversation pretty much a nonexistence. 

Cougar felt a tiny bit guilty about it, because he knew that he could banish most of their worries if he told them that Jensen wasn’t unconscious anymore and would probably wake up again in a few hours at the latest. The only problem with this solution was that he would have to admit to sneaking into Jensen’s room and spending a few hours there instead of sleeping. And that wasn’t something he wanted to do unless absolutely necessary. 

As such he was glad when they, after finishing eating and agreeing to meet up again for lunch, split up; Clay to deal with administrative stuff, Roque set off to find the Rec Center and Pooch decided to accompany him while Cougar headed back to the barracks to pick up some clothing for Jensen. 

Digging through Jensen’s pack that had been dumped into his and Pooch’s room for some clean boxers and a t-shirt, he considered his options, because while Jensen packed plain shirts to wear while on a mission and at most two or three with a print in case they needed to blend in somewhere, the same could not be said about his underwear. And Jensen’s love for colors, pattern and prints did extend to his boxers. 

In the end he settled for a pair of blue-white ones that had dices all over it and a red t-shirt that proclaimed in big letters ‘Built in the eighties original and unrestored’ and underneath in a smaller font ‘Some parts still in working order’. 

Adding a pair of socks for good measure, Cougar bundled everything together and left for the medical facilities. 

Since it was shortly after 7 a.m. he went directly to Jensen’s room and slipped in after giving a warning knock in case anyone conscious was in it at the moment. It turned out to be an unnecessary precaution, not that Cougar was complaining since it meant that he could just settle into his chair after deposing the clothing in the closet and rest his hand in the now familiar spot on Jensen’s arm. 

The occasional murmur and twitch reassured him that Jensen was still just sleeping and hadn’t slipped back into true unconsciousness. Although as expected the bruise on his forehead did look rather spectacular with its dark shades of blue and purple. 

He told as much to the nurse, who came by to reconnect Jensen to an IV, and who promised to inform Doctor Ewing about this fact as soon as possible so they could take it into consideration for the catheter. 

In the end it didn’t become necessary to insert one because Jensen woke up. 

Cougar had been looking out of the window, checking sightlines, when a rustle had made him turn back towards the bed. Jensen had turned his head to the side so that Cougar ended up looking directly into his open eyes. 

“Jensen?” queried Cougar softly to gauge how awake and aware the blond truly was. 

“Hey Cougs,” replied Jensen in a rasping voice. 

“Glasses?” 

“Yeah, please.” 

Content that Jensen wouldn’t fall asleep again in a moment Cougar buzzed the nurses’ station, retrieved the glasses from the nightstand, handed them to their owner and tilted the head part of the bed up. 

“Thanks,” said Jensen once he was a bit more upright and had his glasses on. 

Cougar tilted his head a bit. There was a deeper meaning to this ‘thank you’. 

“For sitting with me,” explained Jensen but at the same time his gaze left Cougar and instead settled on his own arm. Right onto the spot where Cougar used to rest his hand for hours. Jensen must have either seen his hand there or felt it slip away just now. 

Their friendship was full of casual touches but usually it was Jensen who instigated them. However just because it wasn’t the norm didn’t mean that Cougar was uncomfortable with having been caught out indulging in some physical contact of his own. 

“ _De nada_ ,” assured Cougar while lifting his hand to give the arm a short squeeze which earned him a bright smile. 

Just then the door opened and the nurse from earlier entered. 

“Hi,” croaked Jensen and gave a little wave. 

“I’ll get Doctor Ewing and bring you some ice chips. Just a moment please,” promised the nurse before leaving again. 

He returned about two minutes later with a plastic cup and the information that Doctor Ewing would be by within the next fifteen minutes. 

Since Jensen’s muscles were still stiff from the hours of inactivity, it fell to Cougar to actually spoon the ice chips into Jensen’s mouth. 

Jensen of course took the opportunity to make soft chirping sounds whenever he wanted some more. At least that was all he did. 

Naturally Doctor Ewing stepped into the room right when Jensen was chirping. 

Cougar hurried to deposit the next portion of chips into Jensen’s mouth before greeting the slightly stunned looking doctor. 

His greeting was enough to snap her out of her stupor and get her moving again until she stood by the food end of Jensen’s bed. 

“Corporal Jensen, I’m glad to see you awake. Good morning Cougar,” said Doctor Ewing. 

“Wait, why is Cougs ‘Cougar’ but I’m ‘Corporal Jensen’?” asked Jensen indignantly. 

“Because Cougar asked me call him so and you have been unconscious until now,” she explained patiently. 

“So if I ask you to call me ‘Jensen’ we can be done with the whole ‘Corporal Jensen’-thing?” 

“Yes.” 

“Great, because I’m usually only ever ‘Corporal’ if Clay or Roque are pissed at me,” said Jensen while giving her a winsome smile. 

“You seem to be doing very well, Jensen. How are you feeling?” 

“I’m fine. Although I’d really need to go, so could we talk later?” 

“That is not surprising considering that it’s been over twelve hours since your last had a chance to use a toilet and you’re on your second bag of fluids right now. 

“Do you also need to discharge fecal matter?” 

“No. Not yet anyway.” 

“I’ll get you a urinal then,” announced Doctor Ewing and turned to go. 

“Wait. Can’t Cougar just help me to the bathroom?” 

“Since we still don’t know why exactly you collapsed in the first instance, I’d rather not risk it. 

“We can of course still insert a catheter, as was the plan before you woke up.” 

“A urinal sounds perfect, doc,” acquiesced Jensen hurriedly. 

A small smile was playing at the edges of her mouth as Doctor Ewing gave a nod and left. 

Cougar got up, ready to depart too, even if he wasn’t actually keen about it. However someone had to tell the others the good news and he’d probably get send out anyway when Doctor Ewing wanted to discuss Jensen’s health with him. 

“You’re leaving?” asked Jensen with wide blue eyes. 

Cougar tilted his head towards the window. 

“Yeah, I guess it’s unfair not to tell the others that they don’t need to worry anymore. Especially since Roque tends to channel his worry into anger and it’ll be worse right now because he’s hurt too. How’s his ankle anyways?” 

“It’s fine.” 

“That’s good. 

“Be back for lunch?” 

Cougar tipped his hat in agreement and strolled out of the room to head back towards the barracks. 

It was a pity that they had left their cells behind when they set out, because there would have been no need for him to actually search for the rest of his team since he could have just texted them instead. 

Unsurprisingly their rooms at the barracks were empty but Cougar left a note in each one anyway. 

Next he set out to find the Rec Center hoping that Pooch and Roque were still there and hadn’t wandered anywhere else, or worse, had gotten thrown out. 

However, because he noticed the duo on his way there, he never actually made it to the center. 

It was a good thing that Roque was so tall because the two where a street over and if he hadn’t caught sight of Roque’s figure towering over other peoples’ heads out of the corner of his eyes he would have missed them. 

Since Roque was still on crutches Cougar had no problems with catching up to them and falling in step besides Pooch. 

“Shit, Cougs,” exclaimed the mechanic once he noticed him a moment later. “Don’t fucking do that!” 

“Hola,” he greeted serenely. 

“Bit late for that. 

“How’s Jensen?” 

“Awake.” 

“Thank god,” said Pooch, his relieve evident. 

“He doing okay?” pressed Roque. 

“Sí,” answered Cougar with a shrug to signal that this was only his opinion. 

“Does Clay know?” 

“No,” replied Cougar to his SIC’s question. 

“C’mon let’s move over there where we can talk in peace,” directed Pooch and steered them away from the sidewalk so they wouldn’t block it. 

“So why did you come to us first?” 

“Easier,” admitted Cougar. 

“Yeah, I’d have done the same,” agreed Pooch, “with us you at least knew where to start looking. Who knows where Clay’s at at the moment?” 

A short silence ensued. They all knew that ‘administrative stuff’ could end in being send all over the base. 

“Guess we’ll have to start by asking if he got an office assigned and see if he’s there,” sighed Pooch without much enthusiasm. 

“Or we ask if he has an office and then try to call it. Worst case scenario he doesn’t answer in which case he’s probably out to talk to someone else. And if he is someone should know who he’s gone to see and all we’ll have to do is call their office,” contradicted Roque. 

“And start a game of phone-tag?” 

“Why not? Sure beats running around with only the hope of catching up to him if he truly is on the move.” 

Cougar nodded his agreement. He might not be a fan of either method – if it had been left up to him he’d just asked for the office and waited there if he’d found it empty. And if Clay hadn’t returned in time for him to return to Jensen for lunch, he’d have just left another note – but he could see the advantages of Roque’s plan. 

“Okay,” conceited Pooch, “so who’s doing it?” 

Cougar knew he should probably volunteer to do it because the others did deserve a chance to go and see Jensen for themselves, but the idea of having to call who knew how many potential people wasn’t one he enjoyed. 

“I say Roque does it,” announced Pooch after a moment of quiet. “After all he’s SIC and people will react better if it is a Captain that calls. Also it’s his plan.” 

“If I’m doing it, you’re coming with me,” countered the man in question, glaring all the while, “after all I can’t be left alone for even five minutes according to you.” 

Cougar was a little bit tempted to ask what had happened at the Rec Center, because something had obviously happened, but in the end he decided against it. Better to let it lie for a while and then to ask when Roque wasn’t around. 

“Fine,” acquiesced Pooch. “But we’re making a quick stop at the hospital to see Jensen.” 

Roque didn’t even bother with a reply. He just made sure his crutches were positioned correctly and set out in the direction of the medical facilities. 

Pooch sent Cougar an aggravated look before following. 

It only served to make Cougar even more curious about what happened, but again he held his silence and simply fell in step with the mechanic. 

They were lucky; they got there just in time to spend a few minutes with Jensen before he was taken away for some more tests. 

Standing in the now empty room they all stared at the… mess on the nightstand. Jensen had obviously been bored and found the contents of his pockets and started to combine them to build something. 

“Okay,” declared Roque, “Cougar see if they’ll allow you to bring Jensen’s laptop here. Either way he’s not to be left alone again. We don’t need a repeat of the microwave fiasco.” 

They all flinched at the reminder. The microwave fiasco had been the final nail in the coffin in the team's decision to never let Jensen be bored for more than five minutes at a time while not on a mission. 

“Sí,” acceded Cougar. 

“Good. And better take all his knick-knacks with you – just to be on the safe side. 

“Come on Pooch, we still have to get a hold of Clay,” said Roque and turned to go. 

“Yeah. I’m coming. 

“I’ll see you for lunch at the latest, Cougs.” With those words Pooch, too, turned and followed their SIC. 

Cougar left the room immediately after them and went over to the nurses’ station. After a quick conversation he did get permission to bring Jensen his laptop since they were in the general ward, Jensen wasn’t connected to any sensitive equipment and he also didn’t have a roommate who was right now. 

Tipping his hat in gratitude Cougar went back into Jensen’s room to collect the hacker’s paraphernalia before setting out for the barracks. 

Once he was in his and Pooch’s room he carefully transferred everything into Jensen’s pack; with the blond one could never know what might still be considered important even if it seemed to be trash to you. 

Afterwards he pulled out Jensen’s laptop in its bag. Technically it was against the rules for Jensen to bring private equipment like this on a mission but since they were the Losers and it had proven useful in the past Clay allowed it. 

Before he left he trashed the note he’d left for Pooch. 

Luckily he arrived to a still empty room, where he settled himself back into his chair to wait for Jensen’s return. 

It was about half an hour later when a nurse pushed Jensen, who was sitting in a wheelchair, back into the room. 

The smile that lit up Jensen’s face when he caught sight of Cougar was blinding. 

“Coug! Man, am I glad to see you. Your timing is truly impeccable because now I’m allowed to take a shower since you’re here and can make sure I don’t accidently brain myself in the process and we don’t need a nurse to find the extra time for it. Score! 

“Not that there is anything wrong with getting a sponge bath,” he quickly added with a bashful look up at the nurse behind him, “but getting to shower means I’m actually allowed to get up and move around for a bit and I really, really spend waaay to much time prone these past few days.” 

“It’s fine Corporal. It’s actually a good thing that you want to get up and move around. If the two of you are sure that you’ll manage I’ll go and bring you some scrubs and soap as well as something to put over your wound. How does that sound?” 

“Absolutely fantastic!” 

“I brought fresh clothing,” interjected Cougar. 

“Even better!” 

Jensen’s enthusiasm caused the nurse to smile. 

“Just the soap and the band-aid then?” she asked for confirmation. 

“Yes please. Cougs and I can manage the rest, no problem.” 

“All right, I’ll be back in a bit,” said the nurse and left, closing the door behind her. 

Immediately after Cougar stepped forwards so that he stood at Jensen’s left side while the hacker started to lever himself up. 

Jensen would have been fine if he’d stopped as soon as he stood upright, but instead he tried to do a full-body stretch which caused him to lose his balance and prompted Cougar to sling his arm around his friend’s waist to steady him. 

“Okay, that wasn’t one of my brighter ideas,” admitted Jensen, curling his own arm around Cougar’s shoulders. 

Cougar gave a little hum to signal his agreement before he started to lead Jensen over to the bathroom door. 

Despite his little stunt right now, Jensen’s steps were sure and he rested next to no weight on Cougar, indicating that he truly was mostly fine and probably wouldn’t need much help with his shower. 

“So, what did you do while I got poked and prodded? And man, I wish Doctor Ewing would just accept that I’m fine now and stop ordering all those tests, but nooo since they still don’t know why I collapsed they don’t feel comfortable with just declaring me healthy. 

“Although Doctor Ewing did promise that this was the last batch and now they just want to keep me for observation for the next twenty-four hours and if my blood work is still okay then, they’ll release me as long as I take things slowly for a week and do a full physical afterwards. Which kinda seems like overkill to me, but whatever, as long as I’m no longer confined to a bed I’m at least somewhat happy.” 

By now they were inside of the bathroom and got Jensen seated on the closed toilet. When Jensen saw Cougar hesitate a moment before leaving, he seamlessly changed topics. 

“I promise I’ll manage to strip without passing out, so go on and fetch those clothes you promised me. And if you don’t close the door all the way and I keep talking you’ll be able to monitor me the whole time. I even promise to tell you if I start feeling faint or something. 

“Furthermore that nurse will be back soon, as soon as any moment now even, and one of us has to collect the things she’ll bring and well I could totally do it, but I don’t think she’d really appreciate it so that leaves only you. ‘Course you could just accept it through a gap in the bathroom door but again I don’t think that’s a good idea. And we already enacted one bad idea today so maybe we shouldn’t deliberately act on another one - especially so soon after the last one,” finished Jensen with a winsome, if somewhat impish, smile. 

Cougar was well aware of the fact that he had to leave the blond alone for a bit and he would have left in a moment anyways, but now he fixed Jensen with a stern look that clearly communicated that he’d hold the blond to his promise and that he resented being included in the enacting parties of the first bad idea. 

Judging by the fact that Jensen raised his hands in surrender he got the message. Content with this Cougar turned and exited the small space. He did leave the door ajar though. 

His friend, as promised, immediately started talking again. And, in true Jensen fashion, the new topic was seemingly picked at random. “So do you know why ‘Bluetooth’ is called ‘Bluetooth’ and why the logo looks the way it does? 

“It all goes back to an old Danish king called Harald Gormsson who at some point got the nickname ‘Bluetooth’. The reason why he got chosen as a namesake for a technology is because he managed to unite different tribes, the same way the technology is used to unite different devises. 

“The logo is formed by overlaying the rune for ‘h’ with the rune for ‘b’, which is actually a bit of a cheat because they’re supposed to represent his initials but as stated his actual initials would be ‘HG’ or ‘HBG’ if you want to include the nickname. Although I have to admit that considering the runic alphabet they chose, the ‘g’ wouldn’t have fitted in very well. And they did name it ‘Bluetooth’ not ‘Gormsson’ so I guess they have some additional validation for ignoring the ‘g’. 

“Actually logos in general can be very interesting. Did you know th-” 

A quick knock and the opening of the room’s door made Jensen stop talking, which was probably for the best since the blond was perfectly capable to talk about topics he found interesting for hours on end. 

Cougar, who long since had collected the fresh clothes from the closet, took the soap and watertight band-aid from the nurse with a ‘Gracias’ and a quick smile. He returned to the bathroom as soon as he’d made sure that she’d closed the door behind her as she left again. 

Jensen was still sitting on the toilet, though this time he was naked except for a towel placed over his lap. After all they may have all seen each other in the nude by now, but that didn’t mean that they went out of their way to flash each other. 

“See? I’m naked and have no new injuries. Not even a bruise.” Just then Jensen caught sight of the bright red of the t-shirt Cougar had picked out and beamed up at him. “My hero! You’ve brought me something with actual color.” 

Cougar gave a fond headshake in response to Jensen’s dramatics, before placing his hat on the counter next to the change of clothes he’d brought in. Next he stripped off his own shirt, gathered his hair in his nape and secured it with a tie. This way if he had to help Jensen at least he wouldn’t end up with soaked clothing. Lastly he peeled of the band-aid and carefully placed it over the small wound. 

With a curt hand gesture he signaled Jensen that all preparations had been completed and that the tech should get up and into the shower. 

“Always so bossy,” muttered Jensen as he slowly stood up, winding the towel around his hips. 

Cougar just raised an eyebrow, stayed close and paid careful attention so that he would be ready to act at a moment’s notice if necessary. 

Jensen stepped into the cubicle and drew the curtain close. Afterwards he extended his hand, holding the towel, past it. 

Cougar took the towel, refolded and put it to the side, and replaced it with the soap. He took up position against the wall that bordered the shower while Jensen turned on the water and started to hum. 

When the water was turned off again Cougar returned the towel to the blond, who took it with a quick ‘Thanks’ and proceeded to mostly dry himself off while the curtain was still drawn shut. 

Cougar knew that it was only mostly, because Jensen lost his balance as he was getting out of the cubicle and Cougar ended up with a damp chest pressed to his own and an equally damp arm across his back. 

“Hi,” said Jensen in an exaggerated breathy voice. “Come here often?” 

Cougar just rolled his eyes slightly and made sure that the hacker was standing securely on his own two feet again before stepping back. 

“You’re no fun,” pouted Jensen. “You could at least flirt back a little bit. I know you know how to. Hell, I’ve seen you do a very good impression of sex on legs in various bars we’ve been to, so really a little harmless flirting shouldn’t be too much to ask for. Don’t you think?” 

Cougar ignored his friend in favor of taking the hand towel to dry himself off so that he could put his shirt back on. 

Since he was facing the counter and therefore also the mirror he could watch without problems how Jensen forwent drying himself off some more and just dragged on his shirt – making it stick and cling to him in ways the tech’s shirts usually didn’t. 

Jensen’s blue eyes, still unobstructed, met his own through the mirror. 

“Sure you don’t want to flirt a little?” he asked and winked. 

More amused than annoyed with Jensen’s antics Cougar wordlessly directed him to retake his seat on the toilet. 

After his instruction had been followed, Cougar placed the hand towel on his head and started to rub it firmly back and forth to dry the blond tresses beneath it. Ofcourse he remained mindful of the wound throughout the process. 

“Cooougs,” complained Jensen and tried to tug the towel away which just earned him a slight rap to his fingers. “C’mon I’m fine. You don’t need to mother-hen me. Stop it, pleease?” 

Cougar actually did stop a short time later, if only to check how damp the hair still was. Finding it mostly dry he returned the towel to its place. 

Since all that was left now was toremove the additional band-aid and for Jensen to finish changing and to put on his glasses, Cougar did so and then pulled the hair tie free, settled his hat where it belonged and exited the bathroom. This time he leaned against the wall right next to the door he’d again left slightly ajar. 

Jensen took the clue and started talking, “You know, you shouldn’t be so mean to me. After all I’m the patient here and you still owe me for the thing with Clay.” 

“We’re even,” injected Cougar before the hacker could go off on a tangent. 

“We are? How did that happen?” 

Cougar stayed silent because that question had an answer so obvious that Jensen should be ashamed of himself for even voicing it out loud. 

“Uuh… give me a sec, ‘cause I’m getting some disconcerting vibes from you and I’m good but I think some visual clues would be really helpful right about now.” 

True to his word, Jensen stepped out of the bathroom within seconds of finishing his sentence. Leaning against the doorframe he studied Cougar for a few long moments. 

“Coug? I’m kind of afraid to ask… but when exactly did you return to the relay-station?” 

Cougar took a deep breath and expelled it slowly. Letting his residual fear and anger flow out of him with the air, because as much as he was entitled to them, he had never meant to make his friend sound so tentative. 

“In the middle of your evac,” he admitted somewhat reluctantly. 

“Oh shit,” said Jensen with feelings while his hands twitched at his sides. “I’m so sorry, Cougs. I didn’t even really think about that option. 

“I thought the evac team contacted you once they made sure I was stable and that you returned to the station knowing that I wouldn’t be there. Not that you just stumbled into the middle of it with absolutely no warning. 

“And yeah, if that is what happened then we’re totally even. In fact I kinda feel like I owe you, all of you, something now. 

“Are the others angry with me too? I mean –” 

Cougar had caught one of Jensen’s still twitching hands in his own and had given it a firm squeeze. 

“It’s fine, Jensen. _Cálmate_ ,” he soothed, bringing up his free hand to Jensen’s shoulder to give his friend some additional comfort. He wasn’t sure why Jensen had stopped himself from reaching out when he so obviously craved the contact, especially since he usually had absolutely no problems to make himself at home well inside Cougar’s own personal space, but there certainly was no reason why Cougar couldn’t put an end to it. 

Judging by the way Jensen leaned into the hand on his shoulder, wrapped the fingers of his trapped hand around Cougar’s and gave him a small smile, Cougar’s actions were welcome and that was all that mattered. 

They stood like this for a seemingly endless moment before the hacker straightened up, although he didn’t let go of Cougar’s hand. 

“Thanks, Coug.” 

Cougar just gave a small headshake in response to show that it hadn’t been any trouble and then gestured towards the bed. 

“Sure,” agreed Jensen, “wouldn’t want to get in any trouble with the nurses. Worst case scenario they’ll take away my bathroom privileges and start thinking that you’re irresponsible, which we absolutely can’t have, because it’s so far from the truth it’s kind of laughable. 

“Oh yeah, did I tell you about my bathroom privileges yet? Well basically it’s the same deal as with the shower right now. Meaning that as long as someone is here to help me there and back and to keep an discreet eye out while I’m in the bathroom I’m allowed to use the actual toilet and don’t have to resort to a urinal or worse a bedpan. 

“But you know what the best thing is? That in this case it doesn’t even have to be one of you guys because it’s so much less time-consuming. I would, of course, prefer it if it were one of the team but it’s not actually a necessity.” 

By now Jensen was settled back in his bed, even if he was actually sitting on it with his legs crossed instead of actually resting in it. Since Cougar was well aware of how futile it would be to try and get Jensen to actually lie down even with the head part lifted as much as possible, he didn’t even bother with starting an argument and just collected the cup that had contained the ice chips on his way back to the bathroom. 

He had just cleared the threshold when he heard the exclamation, “My laptop! Sweet!” before the tech’s voice descended into a murmur. Inside the bathroom Cougar took a moment to survey the room. 

Jensen had taken the time to hang up his towel but that was literally all he’d done. His worn gown and boxers were in a heap on the ground and small puddles of water could be found here and there. 

With a small exasperated sigh Cougar first set down the cup on the counter and then collected the clothing from the ground to set them on the still closed toilet-lid. Afterwards he took down the towel to mop up the puddles before hanging it and the hospital gown up again. A quick check of the shower stall revealed that there was still a bit of the soap left which he collected and then put next to the sink. Turning on the faucet he bent down to take a drink before filling up the cup and cutting the water off again. Lastly he picked up the boxers and returned to the main room. 

Jensen gave him a distracted smile when he sat down the cup on the nightstand but only started to pay actual attention to Cougar when he opened the closet to put the boxers in the bag containing the rest of the clothing Jensen had worn when he’d been admitted. 

“Oops, sorry Cougs, totally forgot about that in the rush to come out as quickly as possible. Thanks for picking up after me.” 

Cougar waved the thanks away; after all it wasn’t as if it hadn’t been partially his fault, too. 

Having finished what he had wanted to accomplish he went over to his chair and sat down. This time though he kicked off his boots and settled his lower legs on the bed, since it's intended occupant wasn't using the space right now anyways. 

Jensen just hummed and shifted so that one of his feet rested against Cougar’s closest calf before returning his full focus to his laptop. 

A comfortable silence enveloped them, only disrupted by the occasional muttered sentence from Jensen when whatever he was doing either wasn’t working the way he wanted it to, he conquered something he’d been struggling with or things went perfectly. 

Time slipped by unnoticed, both of them too content to bother keeping track of it, right until the door opened and their oasis of calm and quiet got invaded by Pooch and Roque. 

“Hey Guys, how’s it going?” greeted Pooch from behind Roque. 

Cougar nodded back and nudged Jensen’s foot to draw him back out into the real world. It was a familiar action because as long as Jensen knew that there was someone there to watch his back he never had any problems with getting so lost in his computers that he literally would not notice outside things such as a fire alarm going off. 

Now, a teammate entering your room and greeting you might not be on the same scale as a fire alarm but Cougar knew that his own spatial awareness would have roused him from any task he was attending; regardless of how concentrated on it he would have been a moment earlier. 

At times the trust his friend placed in him, in any of them, still boggled his mind. 

When Jensen looked up and caught sight of the others he lit up. 

“Poochman! Roque! How was your hunt for Clay? Were you able to catch your most elusive prey?” 

“Yeah, we found him,” answered Roque while commandeering the second chair, placing his crutches on the ground next to it and causing Pooch to hop up onto Jensen’s bed by the food end. And because Roque could be an asshole he added, “Have you been good for Coug?” 

“Okay, first off,” started Jensen while Pooch snickered, “fuck you. Second, Cougar isn’t a babysitter and even if he were I wouldn’t need one – thank you very much. And last, but not least, I am actually capable of staying out of trouble. 

“So yes, there have been no shenanigans that would get me into trouble if I ever were to be caught even if the chances of that happening are in the negative percentages.” 

“Glad to hear it. In this case we might even be persuaded to bring you some real food for lunch if your doctor okays it.” 

“Is it already time for lunch?” asked Jensen – more to himself than to Roque – before checking the clock on his screen. “Huh, in a bit it actually is. 

“And if it really comes down to the doc’s decision I’m pretty confident that you’ll have to make good on it ‘cause Doctor Ewing is rather easy-going all in all. Well, at least as long as you’re not in any immediate danger and there is next to no chance of you worsening your condition, which there isn’t in my case, just so we’re clear. Therefore she’ll most likely agree to it. 

“Can I have fries? After all I just spend a week eating nothing but MRE’s and now I just crave something deliciously fried and crunchy. So fries, please?” 

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here, alright?” interjected Pooch. “For one you haven’t even asked the Doc yet and for another who knows if there’ll even be fries to be had today. 

“So let’s just chill out for a bit, see if the Doc comes by on her own and if not go to the nurses’ station to ask after her.” 

Since Pooch’s proposal made sense, and they hadn’t had a chance to just hang out as a group in a while, they did just that. 

About 20 minutes later a quick knock interrupted their little get together. 

“Come in,” called out Pooch. 

The door opened to reveal Doctor Ewing, who seemed somewhat surprised to see the room occupied by four people, but didn’t let that fact stop her from entering it fully while most of them called out greetings to her. 

“Good day gentleman,” she replied and came forward until she stood next to Roque. “I think I can safely presume that you’re the SIC of this team?” she asked and extended a hand. 

“Yeah, name’s Roque. Good to meet you, Doctor Ewing,” said Roque and shook her hand. 

“So Doc, how are things looking concerning this idiot here?” It was obvious that Pooch had only spoken up to stop Jensen from voicing his own question – his smirk and the pat he gave the blond’s knee spelled this fact out very clearly to his teammates. 

“Well, the results of the last tests we ran came back and they all say that Jensen is perfectly healthy. As such I’m willing to discharge him tomorrow afternoon, provided that his blood work is still good in the morning and that he takes it easy for a week. Furthermore he will have to complete a full physical exam before he may return to active duty.” 

“See, I told you I was fine and in no danger of getting worse. 

“Now Doctor Ewing, I have a very important question for you: Am I allowed to eat non-hospital food? Because if I am, Roque promised me some food from the mess hall. And since the plan seems to be for all five of us to eat lunch here, it would be really akin to torture if I had to sit here and eat hospital food while the rest of them get to eat regular food, especially since I've been living off of MREs for the past week. 

“So, please say yes. Please?” pled Jensen. 

“While I have no objections to you eating mess hall food, I would prefer if someone other than Roque brought it here, seeing as he seems to be on crutches and is therefore most probably under orders to rest as much as possible. 

“Also if you do indeed plan to eat as many meals as possible as a group here, I would like to remind you that this is a hospital and if you behave in a way that disturbs either the other patients, their families or the staff I will be forced to put restrictions on the amount of visitors allowed in here at the same time. 

“Is that understood?” 

“Yes, ma’am,” chorused Roque, Pooch and Jensen while Cougar nodded his compliance. 

“Good. 

“Jensen, I want to schedule a meeting with you and your CO tomorrow sometimes around midday if possible. Please see to it, that an actual appointment is made with the nurses. 

“If you have no further questions, I’ll leave you gentleman to your lunch.” 

“No, we should be good. I’ll make sure to talk to Clay and ask him when he’ll be available. 

“And thanks for letting me avoid hospital food,” replied Jensen and gifted her with a bright smile. 

“You’re welcome. 

“I wish you all a good day,” said Doctor Ewing, nodded to them and left the room while they echoed her goodbye back to her. 

“So it seems that Coug and I are on lunch duty,” mused Pooch once the door was closed. “You have any wishes, Roque?” 

“Either something spicy or a burger would be great.” 

“I’ll see what I can do for you, bro. 

“C’mon Cougs, let’s go,” said the mechanic while getting off the bed. 

Following Pooch’s prompt Cougar put on his boots again in preparation for going out to the mess hall. 

“You’ll bring me fries if you can, right?” 

Cougar nodded in response to Jensen’s query before he stood up and went over to Pooch who was already standing by the open door. 

“We’ll hopefully be back soon. If Clay shows up here without food, tell him he needs to go and get his own,” with those words Pooch exited the room. 

Cougar nodded to his remaining team mates before pulling the door shut behind him and taking a few quick steps in order to catch up with Pooch, who was already standing by the elevators. 

“Okay,” started Pooch once they were out on the streets, “so I brought up your five-day-stipulation with Roque, who thought it sounded kind of bull, but since he couldn’t come up with something better decided to let it slide as long as it doesn’t cause us to many problems or complicates a mission too much. 

“So then we talked to Clay about it, who, too, was somewhat skeptical about it but agreed to it, because, how did he put it… oh yeah, ‘having a precaution in place, even one as strange as this one, is still better than having to deal with Jensen falling unconscious in the middle of an op’. 

“Of course he’s only willing to allow it as long as there is no repeat of all this,” here he made an encompassing gesture to their surrounding, “while the rule is in place. If there is, it will be debunked so fast that you’re liable to contract whiplash from it. 

“And also, since it was your idea you’ll get saddled with Jensen-duty the most often, with no right to refuse it. Though you may try to bargain with me or Roque if you feel the need to. 

“Plus this won’t be like, for example, the five-minute-boredom-rule that only we know about, ‘cause you know Jensen would so go out of his way to break it if he knew about it. Instead Clay will tell him what’s up and that there will be consequences if he tries to circumvent it and ends up unconscious again. 

“So now you’re all caught up and won’t be surprised when Clay brings it up at lunch later, because you know Jensen’ll try to talk his way out of it, so we need to present a united front right from the get go. 

“Can’t wait to see Jensen’s face though when he hears the news and neither can Roque. Come to think of it that may be part of why he agreed to go along with this. I don’t think he’s quite forgiven Jensen yet for making him worry.” 

By now they were within sight of the building housing the mess hall and while Cougar was still listening to Pooch his attention had strayed a bit when the other man stopped relaying important information and started musing instead, allowing him to spot a familiar figure in the crowd ahead of them. 

He nudged Pooch in the side and nodded his head in Clay’s direction when he got a ‘What?’ in return. 

“Well, that’s convenient timing,” commented Pooch, before he raised his voice and called out, “Yo, Boss, wait up.” 

The shout had turned a few heads, most of them out of curiosity due to the informality and the lack of decorum displayed by it, making Cougar wish that they were on their home base, because the people there were used to them and their antics and one of them trying to catch Clay’s attention wouldn’t have been cause for talk, or whispers in this case. 

It had accomplished its intended purpose though, since Clay had stepped to the side in order to wait for them to reach his position without blocking the flow of the midday-crowd. 

“Pooch, Cougar,” greeted Clay them when they got to him, “you on food-duty?” 

“Yeah. Lunch in Jensen’s room is approved by the Doc as long as we don’t bother anyone and she even allowed Jensen to skip the hospital food. 

“Also we can probably head home sometime tomorrow afternoon.” 

“Good to know; Coleman has been asking as has the local command. I’ll let them know and see for what time we can get a ride back to base. 

“Anything else?” 

“Not really. Got Cougs caught up so you can drop the bomb on Jensen whenever you feel like it, but otherwise I know nothing new.” 

“Cougar?” came the prompt inquiry but he just shook his head in response. And even if there had been something to report, they were in the mess hall now and this was certainly no place to give voice to such information. 

“Alright. 

“Let’s grab something to eat and get out of here again,” said Clay and since that had been the plan all along Pooch and Cougar fell easily in line. 

They acquired food for all of them – including fries for Jensen – and returned to Jensen’s room with their precious haul where they were greeted with jeers and thanks. 

Lunch itself was a comfortable affair with their usual mix of talk and teasing and it was obvious that it did all of them a world of good to be together like this again. 

However as all good things, it too, had to come to an end and once it did, Clay spoke up. 

“Okay, so I have a few things to say. 

“First off, I’ve spoken to the General and since we have some unexpected free time right now and none of us is seriously hurt, he expects our mission reports pretty much as soon as we’re back on base, so get them written up. 

“Secondly,” continued Clay without giving them time to complain about the unwelcome news, “in light of how this mission proceeded there’ll be a new rule for this unit from now on. Failure to adhere to it will be punished. 

“The rule is: Jensen, from now on you are no longer allowed to spend more than five days alone while we’re on a mission. To insure that this timeframe is always at its fullest in case of an emergency you are to remain in the presence of at least one of us whenever possible. Is that understood?” 

The anticipation that had been growing since Clay announced the existence of the new rule came to a – at least for Roque, Pooch and Cougar – very satisfactory end when they saw the stunned expression on Jensen’s face. 

For a moment Jensen just sat there with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth, before he gathered himself enough to speak. 

“What the hell?! You can’t be serious, Clay! Guys, please tell me that this is a joke?” Here Jensen took the time to take in all of their faces, probably looking for a twitch that would betray the fact that they really were playing a trick on him. However before one of the others could say something he went on. 

“Okay, so not a joke. And I get that I worried you, and I’m sorry for it, I am, but don’t you think you’re taking things a bit too far? I’m not a baby I can live without the clapping of hands, funny faces and terms of affection.” The last sentence was accompanied by a decisive nod. To their hacker this was obviously a valid and powerful argument but Cougar felt rather confused by it and a quick glance towards the others showed similar expressions of bafflement on their faces. 

“Really?” asked Jensen somewhat exasperated when he caught on to their confusion, “Not one of you gets this reference? I mean sure, it’s not American history and I paraphrased it because originally there are words such as ‘countenance’ and ‘blandishments’ involved and they’re just bulky and make you sound totally stuck-up, but come on, doesn’t it ring any bell? 

“No? 

“How about ‘Frederic the second’ and ‘language experiments’? ‘The Forbidden Experiment’? ‘Language deprivation experiments’? 

“Still ‘No’? 

“Oh man, I don’t know if that is just sad or already depressing, but for those, who have no idea what I’m talking about here’s the short version – may it enlighten you and do something for your general education. 

“Okay so throughout history there were some, oftentimes, royal nutjobs who wanted to know what humanities true language was and who thought that the best way to find out is to see what language a baby would start to speak on its own. One of those was Frederic the second, who lived during the 13th century in Europe. He took a bunch of babies gave them to foster-mothers and only allowed them to wash and nurse them and nothing else. 

“Long story short: they all died of emotional neglect and the thing with ‘clapping hands’, ‘countenance’ and ‘blandishments’ was used to describe that phenomenon. 

“So what I was basically telling you was that I’m a grown-ass person who can take care of themselves and who is not dependent on you for their emotional wellbeing. And okay, yeah, the check-ins made the whole situation more bearable, because they assured me that all of you were more or less okay while out on a mission without me, but principally I’m capable of spending a week on my own, so won’t you please get rid of this truly ridiculous new rule, Clay? Please?” the last plea was accompanied by Jensen’s puppy-eyes, probably to give it some extra weight. 

“This is not a negotiation, Jensen,” replied Clay sharply. “We’re military and I’m in charge of this unit, therefore what I say goes. I can’t have you fainting during missions, especially not without a reason. This rule is in place as a precaution and even if it turns out to be useless at least there will hopefully be someone with you to prevent you from smashing your skull open. 

“We got lucky this time. Who knows how things will turn out the next one? I can’t have that risk. We, all of us, can’t have that risk. Therefore for the sake of this unit you will comply with this rule. 

“Is that understood?” 

“Yes, sir,” acquiesced Jensen with slightly hunched in shoulders after he’d taken a quick look at all of their faces and postures. 

“Good. 

“Now I believe that all of you have some reports to write up. There is one additional computer in the office we were lent and Jensen has his two laptops, so while two of you will need to share we should manage to finish the reports until tomorrow. 

“Since I want Roque with me, to man the office in case I get called away, he gets the first use of the other computer if someone else is also interested in it. 

“What about you? Pooch? Cougar?” 

“Yeah, I’m coming with you,” said Pooch. “Because you know how Jay gets when it comes to his electronics and there is no way the Pooch will spend an afternoon locked into a room with a sulking Jensen.” 

“Hey!” 

“Fair enough,” agreed Clay without acknowledging Jensen’s protest which just made the blond pout harder. 

“Alright, let’s clean up and get to work.” 

There were few words spoken, while they collected and stacked the different utensils that they had used for easier transport back to the mess hall, most of them by Jensen when he remembered to tell Clay that he should make an appointment with Doctor Ewing. During the collection of the trash, the little cup that had once contained the ice chips got thrown out, too. 

When everything was tidied up and everyone but Jensen made to leave, Cougar hung back and let the other three go ahead of him. As soon as Jensen saw him linger he made a questioning face – clearly he wasn’t willing to stop sulking just yet. 

“Call your sister,” said Cougar which earned him a groan. 

“Seriously? Is there no end to the amount of emotional blows I have to put up with today? What’s going to happen next? Will one of my laptops get fried or otherwise damaged? It would certainly fit the pattern.” 

“Call her,” he reiterated before making his exit and closing the door behind himself. He felt no regret about leaving like that, since Jensen was mostly being dramatic and complaining for the sake of complaining and he could do that just as well with his sister. 

He was somewhat surprised when he managed to catch up with the others by the elevators but since the doors opened as soon as he came to a stop next to Pooch, he figured that it was more of a coincidence than anything else. 

They filled into the empty cart and as soon as the doors had closed behind them, Pooch started to snicker. 

“Oh man, did you see his face when Clay told him about the new rule? It was hilarious!” 

“It sure was,” agreed Roque with a, for him, big smile on his face. 

Clay, too, was visibly amused by the memory, but managed to make his voice sound stern when he said, “Now, no matter how shocked Jensen was at the news, we did install this rule in order to preserve his health, it is therefore no laughing matter.” 

“Oh, come off it, Clay. I can see you biting back your laughter,” scoffed their SIC which was all Clay needed to start chuckling. 

“It’s too bad, that we don’t have our phones back yet; I’d have loved a photo this as proof that it’s actually possible to completely blindside Jay.” 

The elevator arriving at the first floor made Clay, Roque and Pooch straighten up and smooth their features into something more neutral. After all it was one thing to make fun of a team member in a relative private setting and a completely different one to do so in front of strangers, much less unknown military personnel. 

The remaining trip to the mess hall passed by without incident and once they had returned their utensils they split up – Clay, Roque and Pooch heading for their temporary office while Cougar went to his and Pooch’s room to collect Jensen’s officially issued laptop. 

After he took a quick leak he left with the laptop safely tucked under his arm – after all it wouldn’t do for it to actually become damaged. Jensen might have been exaggerating about the severity of the impact that would be caused if one of his laptops got damaged but that didn’t mean that there wouldn’t be troublesome consequences to it. 

He had almost made it to Jensen’s room when things got a bit hairy – a commotion around the corner gave him just enough warning to plaster himself against the wall before a throng of nurses and doctors clustered around a bed rushed by his position. 

In the resulting racket he might have missed Jensen’s voice if he wasn’t so attuned to it. As it was he just managed to catch the words, “No, of course, the head wound wasn’t planned, but it’s not like I could take pre-emptive measures without giving away the fact that the call was staged.” which caused him to freeze in place. 

A quick glance to his side showed that Jensen’s door was now slightly ajar, allowing the words to reach Cougar. 

He knew that he should leave. He knew those words were not for him that they would never have been said if Jensen had been aware of his presence. He knew that it was wrong for him to stay – regardless of how much he wanted to understand what had happened in the relay-station. 

Torn between what he knew was the right action and his desire for knowledge he dithered for too long. And once Jensen had started talking again he just couldn’t make himself leave. 

“Look, as soon as I knew that the team wouldn’t make it back on the sixth day I made a recording for the emergency call – and you have to love military protocol for making the start of a conversation so predictable – which I then paired with a little program that upon activation would act like a dead man’s switch, but instead of shutting something down it would initiate the call and pace the recording. 

“I activated it as soon as I started to feel really sollow,” – ‘sollow’? ‘so low’? Jensen wasn’t really prone to slur words together when he was sober but Cougar didn’t know the word ‘sollow’. Not that ‘so low’ made all that much more sense – “and as an additional precaution the questioning intervals grew shorter in time. 

“The whole thing was as safe as I could make it. I promise.” 

There was a short silence, in which Cougar actually managed to push himself off of the wall, but as if Jensen’s voice had the power of a siren’s he froze in place again when the blond continued. 

“Okay, yes, going on the mission was a risk and yes the risk was different than normal, but it’s not like I could have just gotten out of it and if things had gone more smoothly it wouldn’t have taken so long, so it’s not the teams fault that I was alone for so long. 

“Also, it’s not like I didn’t know how far I could safely push things, there is after all a reason we did those experiments back in college. 

“Oh and you’ll _love_ this. I’ve been put on, uhm, what’s the opposite of babysitting duty? To be put under watch? To be babysat? Actually, I don’t think this passive exists… 

“Anyways, I am under orders which only allow me to be alone for five days tops if necessary and if possible to always be in the company of one of the others. So unless I’m off on my own for days and for some reason start a lengthy interaction with a pack,” – Cougar frowned, he couldn’t think of any pack that made sense in this context and Jensen's intonation had beena little bit weird– “this will be the only time I end up in a hospital like this.” 

Cougar slumped against the wall in relief. He might not know what Jensen meant when he spoke of ‘a pack’ but it seemed to be something that his friend had at least some control over. That made Jensen’s discontent with the new rule more than worth it. 

“Yeah, I think it was Cougar’s idea. He definitively noticed that something was up. And –”, the mention of his name had been enough to startle Cougar out of his stupor as well as finally releasing him from the spell that had him rooted to the spot next to Jensen’s door and allowing him to walk away, causing Jensen’s voice to grow softer until he could no longer hear it. 

With the tech’s laptop still tucked under his arm he headed for the stairs and took them down to the reception area where he bought himself a coffee from an automat. 

Settled in a chair he took the time he needed to drink the cup to order his thoughts and calm his conscience. 

Yes, it had been wrong of him to eavesdrop on the conversation between Jensen and his sister but in the end he still didn’t actually know what was up with Jensen since he hadn’t understood what the blond had meant when he’d spoken of ‘sollow’ or ‘pack’. It wasn’t entirely unusual for Jensen to use words Cougar didn’t know – however proficient he had gotten since he’d started to learn English as his second language there was no way he could match Jensen’s enormous vocabulary – and when that happened his friend was always more than happy to explain the meanings to him, but this time he decided that he wouldn’t ask or start his own research. 

He would respect Jensen’s privacy as much as he could from this point on. 

He would be satisfied with the knowledge that the new rule would help keep Jensen as safe as possible from this new, no not new, just previously unknown to him thing. After all the reduction of risks was the best thing they could do with their current jobs. 

Content with his resolutions he stood up, threw away his empty cup and retraced his steps back to Jensen’s room again. 

The door was still ajar but this time he couldn’t hear Jensen’s voice through the crack. Rapping his knuckles against it caused it to swing open a bit more. 

He wasn’t terribly surprised when there was no reply and simply entered without waiting any longer. 

After closing the door firmly behind himself he went over to Jensen’s bed, on which the tech was still sitting up, though this time his legs were extended and he was wearing earbuds. 

Cougar nudged his shoulder softly, causing Jensen to look up, smile at him and to remove one of the earbuds. 

“Hey Cougs, ready to get the reports written up? Not that it will take all that long for me, since I am already mostly finished – all that free time in that shack was at least good for that – and if you want I’ll let you use mine as a template, after all you already more or less know what I did there what with the daily reports you demanded. 

“I do need my work-laptop first though because that’s where mine is currently saved on but I’ll just copy it over and then you can have a go at it. Sounds good?” 

Cougar nodded, handed over the laptop he’d been carrying, rounded the bed and took a seat in his chair. 

Jensen meanwhile had put his personal laptop to the side – with both earbuds placed on it – placed the official one on his lap and had switched it on. Obviously though he hadn’t taken the time to pause his music since Cougar was still able to hear it playing from the earbuds, though not clearly enough to identify what exactly was being played at the moment. 

While the laptop powered up, the blond reached over to the bag that had contained his personal laptop and pulled out a flash drive which he then proceeded to play around with until he was able to log in. 

Once that was done it only took a few more moments to plug the flash drive in, copy the file onto it, remove the drive, open the document and then pass the laptop over to Cougar. 

“Just don’t forget to change the name when you save it – two different files with the same name will only lead to disaster,” said Jensen with a slight grin. 

Cougar gave a small nod and after a quick look down to check on the battery, full, he started to fill in his own information, overwriting Jensen’s. 

Soon the loudest sound in the room was the clacking of the keys. 

“Coug?” interrupted Jensen the silence after about one and a half hour. “You at a point where you can stop for a bit?” 

Cougar held up a finger, finished his sentence and saved his progress – and yes he did remember to rename the document – before turning his attention to his friend. 

“Will you make sure that I won’t injure myself while I take a trip to the bathroom?” 

In response Cougar transferred the laptop from his lap to the foot end of the bed, stood up and went around to stand at the other side of it. 

“Thanks,” said Jensen while placing his own laptop to the side, throwing the blanket off of his legs and then slid to the floor next to Cougar. 

Since the tech seemed firm on his feet Cougar refrained from placing a helping hand on Jensen and just matched his pace to the bathroom door. 

Like before the door remained ajar while Jensen slipped inside and started talking. 

“So, do you know whether there are any team-wide plans concerning dinner? Because lunch was fun and I’ve really missed all of us just being together during the mission. 

“Not that your presence isn’t great – you know you’re my favorite team member and I’ve missed you above all the others – and I’d certainly never say no to us spending time together, but well, you know how I’m an avid believer of ‘the more the merrier’ and besides lunch there hasn’t been either ‘more’ or ‘merry’ during that last mission for me. 

“And yeah we’ll have some time once were back on base but Roque will get crankier the longer he has those crutches, Clay will be haunted by administrative stuff, Pooch will mope if he won’t get permission to go leave base and so the overall mood probably won’t be as good as it was during lunch; although depending on how things are going in the office the mood might be a bit more subdued in which case there is nothing we can do about it. 

“Oh and speaking about moods and life existing outside of the base, I am supposed to pass along some things frommy sister. 

“First off: thank you for getting me to call her so soon and yes, she yelled at me for you. 

“Second: she wishes you all the best and all the strength you may need for dealing with me – and I do resent the implications that are being made here. 

“And last: you better keep your promise to show up as soon as possible so that she can actually lay eyes on and get to know the corporate form of my common sense that I suddenly gained – which again, is just rude of her, I already had more than enough common sense before I met you. Thank you very much. 

“So back to the original topic – do you know anything about dinner plans?” 

Having heard the flushing of the toilet and the subsequent turning on and off of the faucet, Cougar wasn’t surprised when the door opened at the last question. 

However while Cougar was aware that Dr. Ewing had given them permission to eat together here in Jensen’s room and he certainly planned to take her up on that offer, he and the others hadn’t actually made any plans for dinner. He therefore had no choice but to answer the inquiry by shaking his head. 

“Oh well, I guess we’ll wait and see. There’re still a few hours left anyways, so it’s not like it’s an urgent matter. 

“So how far along are you with your report?” 

Cougar lifted his hand and made a so-so gesture. 

“I’ll leave you to it then; wouldn’t want to land you on Coleman’s bad side. 

“Tell me when you’re finished though? We can do something together.” 

Cougar gave a little hum in reply as he watched Jensen resettle himself on the bed, however instead of returning to his own seat he cocked his head in the direction of the door. 

“Will you be gone long?” 

He shook his head slightly before tilting it a bit to indicate that he didn’t think so, but wasn’t entirely sure. 

“Okay, I’ll see you in a bit then.” 

After touching two fingers to his hat he turned to go. 

His trip to the nurses’ station to request a pitcher of water and two glasses went off without a hitch, even if the nurse who handed them to him seemed confused as to why they didn’t have one already since they should have gotten one with the lunch-tray at the latest. His explanation that they had brought Jensen lunch from the mess hall and that there had been no lunch-tray delivered to his room was met with an exasperated, if satisfied, ‘I see.’. 

Since he had known that he probably would have both hands full upon his return, Cougar had left the door ajar, so that he just had to nudge it out of the way now in order to enter. Once inside he headed straight for the table in the corner where he put everything down. He had chosen to put it there not only because Jensen’s laptop back was still on top of his nightstand but also to ensure the safety of the glassware. 

After he’d turned back to close the door, he filled both glasses and brought them over to the bed where Jensen was again listening to something and engrossed with whatever he was doing on his laptop. He only needed to loom over and stare intensively at the hacker for a few moments before blue eyes flicked up to meet his own and one earbud was tucked free. 

“What’s up Cougs?” 

Wordlessly he held out one of the glasses. 

“Thanks,” answered Jensen taking the glass and sipping from the cool liquid inside of it. However when he turned to place the still mostly full glass to the side, Cougar intervened by placing his free hand over the blond’s and pushing it slightly back. And while Jensen shot him a baleful glance he did empty the glass with a few long swallows. 

“You know, your mother-henning is not endearing in any way,” said the tech after handing back the glass and crossing his arms over his chest, making his biceps bulge. 

Cougar shrugged unrepentantly, drained his own glass and carried them back the table. 

Afterwards he settled himself in his chair again and resumed working on his report, which he managed to finish about a good hour later. Having saved it after one last read-through and feeling relieved to be done with it, he gladly transferred the laptop onto the bed, stood up and stretched. 

Seeing as Jensen had remained obvious to his movements, Cougar took the chance to slip into the bathroom for a few minutes. 

Following this he refilled the glasses and repeated his looming and staring until Jensen’s attention was his once more. 

In contrast to the earlier occasion though, this time Jensen let out a groan when he caught sight of the glasses. 

“Really Cougs? Don’t you have anything better to do than trying to manage my water-intake?” At Cougar’s raised eyebrow he admitted, “Okay, not trying, because yes, in the end I will give in to your demands and drink this glass too, but could you at least leave me with the illusion of my own autonomy? I mean I am capable of detecting and then stilling my own thirst; I’ve actually done so successfully for years now. 

“Also aren’t you ashamed of yourself? I mean you do know the saying ‘With great power comes great responsibility’, right? Yet, here you are with your great power, because there are few people who actually manage to commandeer my attention just by standing there, staring and thinking at me, and you use it for such unnecessary trivialities as this. This should really count as an abuse of power in my opinion and as I’m the aggrieved party here, my opinion is very much relevant. 

“Furthermore you should be damn glad that you’re my best friend and that I know why you’re doing it, because objectively this is kind of degrading, seeing as I am a healthy person with no physical or psychological problems that would result in me needing help and you’re totally patronizing me right now. 

“And yes, I’m aware that I’m making a big and totally superfluous fuss about this and that I’m being dramatic, so you can stop trying to bring it to my attention through your judge-y looks and silence. 

“So now that I’ve said what I felt needed to be said, you may give me that glass of water and I will drink it without further protests.” 

Cougar did as he was told since it would finally lead to _Jensen_ doing as he was told, well indicated, but the result remained the same, while inwardly marveling about the fact that he had grown actually fond of Jensen’s habitual dramatics instead of just finding them supremely annoying, which was his usual reaction when confronted with such behavior. 

Drinking his own water he contemplated that it probably had something to do with the fact that most of the time you weren’t meant to take them serious and that they were more part of Jensen’s carefully cultivated ‘harmless little tech’-persona than anything else. 

“Here, see, I drank everything.” 

Jensen’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts and seeing as the glass was pretty much being presented to him he couldn’t resist patting Jensen on the head with the words, “ _Bien hecho_ ,” before taking the glass back. 

“Hey! There’s no need to be mean! 

“And because you were and it was totally uncalled for, you now get no say in the movie we’re going to watch! Take that!” 

Since he had already turned around to bring the empty glasses back to the table, Cougar allowed himself the luxury to roll his eyes. By now Jensen knew his tastes in movies pretty well and while he did of course try to show Cougar new things he always asked beforehand; he therefore had no reason to be afraid of this threat. 

When he turned back Jensen was sitting cross-legged with both laptops in front of him. 

“You seem to be done with your report, so we can start the movie now, right?” 

Cougar gave a short nod and sat down at the foot end. 

“Great! 

“So I’m going to shut this one off,” the tech mumbled to himself, while turning to the official laptop, “Just checking… yup, you remembered to rename the document, so we can close this and this and now nighty-night, your battery is nearly dead anyways, but don’t worry I’ll hook you up over night.” 

Here he was shortly silent before turning to his own laptop. 

“And now to you my darling, since we’re going to watch a movie, we won’t need this anymore, though this bit of code looks promising so we’ll save it for now, and we’ll call it ‘Future Badassery’, because if I get it to work the way I want it to, it will be seriously badass… and here we’ll save our progress and now where did I hide the folder with the movies… there it is and oh god I had forgotten I uploaded this one, but for now I think we’ll go with this one, come on, behave and open now, there’s a good file. 

“You want to share the earbuds or should we turn on the speakers?” 

“Speakers.” 

“Okay, speakers it is. 

“I say we tilt up the head end as far as possible and then prop the laptop up on one of our thighs each, what do you think?” 

“Lower the bed. Use the table.” 

“Ohh, that’s a good idea. 

“Okay, you get your boots off; I’ll put this one away in the nightstand and then unfold the table. And then we’ll see about adjusting the bed. Yeah?” 

Cougar hummed an affirmative and started to unlace his shoes. 

A short time later everything was set up to their satisfaction and they started to get engrossed with the movie. 

They even managed to finish it before someone showed up. 

Jensen was in the bathroom talking, when the knock came, while Cougar was leaning against the wall besides the bathroom door, which also put him pretty much in front of the room’s door. 

Cougar knocked on the bathroom door to make Jensen stop talking just as the room’s door started to open, making him extend the closer arm to stop it from opening all the way and preventing the person outside from actually entering. 

“Hey man, what’s up?” asked Pooch through the gap. 

“Is that the Poochman I hear?” 

“Yeah, Jay, it’s me. How about you tell your bodyguard to let me in?” 

Slightly exasperated Cougar moved towards the main part of the room in order to create enough room for Pooch to come inside too. Though of course since Jensen was still inside the bathroom and so couldn’t actually see him go he continued the conversation without regard for this fact, “Coug, are you having a bad day, or is there another reason for you being mean to your team mates?” 

Pooch now inside and in the process of closing the door behind himself, came to a sudden stop. “Wait what? Since when is Cougs mean to you? Especially when you’re not okay?” 

“I am fine, really how often do I need to tell you? 

“And Cougs was being a patronizing jerk, but I got him back, so everything is all right.” 

Since Jensen flushed the toilet right after finishing his sentence and then started the faucet, Pooch refrained from answering, though he did shoot a questioning glance at Cougar. 

“Don’t let him fall,” was all Cougar said in reply. 

“You know, I spend the last few hours being an errand boy for our high-ranking grumpy-pants, to the point where I’m still not finished with my report – in fact I’m here on an errand – and now you’re bossing me around too.” He continued talking, but this time it was directed at Jensen, who had just exited the bathroom, “You’re right, he truly is being mean today.” 

“Nah, I’m just not allowed to be up and about without somebody making sure that I don’t take a tumble and since you apparently made him move, you’re now the one stuck with the duty to do so. So it’s not Coug being mean, it’s just that your timing sucks. 

“So what kind of errand brings you here?” 

“Well, we have a possible transport but it’s scheduled to leave at 14:00 and while it would be possible to push it back a bit, no one is really fond of the idea, so I came here to ask your Doc if it’s possible for you to be released in time for us to make it and also to finalize Clay's appointment with her. 

“Also Jensen, your bed is over there.” 

“I know,” answered Jensen unconcerned as he ignored his bed in favor of the table where the, by now, rather empty pitcher and the glasses stood. With a pointed look at Cougar he filled a glass and downed it, before going over to his bed and settling back on it. 

“Whatever, man. I don’t think I want to know. 

“Anyways, since we’re planning to have dinner here again, Coug you’re either supposed to meet us in front of the mess hall in about forty minutes or to just come with me right now so we can avoid the need to wait and search for each other. 

“So which will it be?” 

“Meet you there.” 

“Why am I not surprised? Just be prepared to wait for a bit in this case – since Doctor Ewing gave her okay, we’ll try and finalize the transport before dinner. And to that end, I’m saying: seeing you later, bye,” said Pooch and left. 

“Well, forty minutes isn’t all that long. What are we going to do?” 

After shrugging, Cougar, too, went over to the table, and emptied the pitcher all the way by pouring the remaining liquid into a glass. However instead of setting it down, he kept it in hand and went to the nurses’ station to get it refilled. 

When he got back, he saw that Jensen unexpectedly hadn’t returned to his computer yet, but ignored the blond in order to fill up the rest of his glass and drink it. 

“Smooth, Cougs. Reeeal smooth,” commented Jensen, his voice heavy with sarcasm. 

And although he hadn’t actually intended for this to mean anything at all, in the light of Jensen’s reaction and his earlier marked display, Cougar chose to reply by giving an only slightly exaggerated, but still gracious nod. 

Jensen, of course, started to snicker, before taking a deep breath and saying, “Okay, point well made. 

“But we still don’t know what we’re going to do for the next half hour or so.” 

Cougar shrugged again, since he hadn’t given it any real thought while getting the pitcher refilled. 

And although Jensen made a few proposals they were rather half-hearted, so that in the end Jensen occupied himself with his laptop and Cougar just sat there enjoying the normality of it, letting it sooth the last of his worries. 

Unfortunately he couldn’t bask in it for as long as he wanted to, since he had to leave for the mess hall, where it turned out that he could have stayed longer, since the others showed up nearly fifteen minutes late. 

Naturally, Pooch started to taunt him about it, seeing as it kind of was Cougar's own fault, seeing as he had decided to remain with Jensen, rather than to go with the mechanic when he had had the chance. 

Cougar, instead of pointing out that they weren’t really supposed to leave Jensen alone, retaliated by revealing that _his_ report was finished and that Pooch therefore shouldn’t have left after lunch in the first place. 

And once Pooch tried to blame his unfinished report on the fact that not only had he been used as an errand boy but that he also had been dependant on Roque finishing his first, more or less implying that he would have been done if Roque had worked faster, making Roque involve himself into the conversation, it grew from there. 

All throughout dinner they traded playful taunts and barbs and gently made fun of each other, after all it wouldn’t do to get their tempers up in the current setting. 

Cougar could practically see Jensen making note of everything he hadn’t heard of before and probably already making plans on how to find out the respective details. 

Things were already winding slowly down, when Doctor Ewing showed up to discuss the details of tomorrow, so that Jensen’s discharge would hopefully go off without a hitch. 

After Doctor Ewing had left, they cleaned up and everyone but Jensen left for the mess hall again, to return their used dishes. That done they split up again, with Clay and Pooch returning to the office, Roque going to the barracks and Cougar went back to Jensen’s room to spend the rest of the visiting hours there. 

He left at 9 p.m. sharp with a request from Jensen to please bring him his shaving kit, seeing as they would, in all likelihood, be meeting the General tomorrow and avoidable stubble wouldn’t be the way to convince him that Jensen was in fact fine. 

His and Pooch’s room was empty when he returned, but considering that his last night had been rather short, he immediately got ready for bed. 

Pooch came in, just as he was slipping beneath the sheets, and quickly and as quiet as possible preformed his own evening routine before turning off the last remaining light. 

Shortly afterwards both men were fast asleep. 

* * *

This time when Roque showed up to collect them for breakfast, Cougar had been awake for a while already and had used the early start to get showered, shaved and dressed in fresh clothing. 

They ate breakfast in the mess hall, distributing the last tasks that still needed to be done, before going their separate ways to attend to them. 

In Cougar’s case that luckily, mostly meant looking after Jensen and his things as well as his own. To this end he returned to the barracks, made sure all of his thinks were ready for transport and, since it was the easiest solution, shouldered Jensen’s pack and went over to the medical facilities. 

Somewhat unusually Jensen’s door was open and from inside he could hear familiar humming and the clacking of computer keys. 

Entering with a short knock, he put down the pack so that it was leaning against the closet and then went over to the still obvious blond, who was sitting cross-legged on his bed. To gain his attention Cougar reached out and touched one red-clad shoulder, giving it a soft nudge. 

Jensen’s head shot up, a wide smile already in place. 

“Hey, good morning, Cougs! 

“How’s it going? Have you remembered to bring me my kit?” 

Cougar gave him a small answering smile and pointed to Jensen’s pack. 

“Well, that is a bit more than I asked for, but whatever. 

“So since I had no problems getting to and from the bathroom yesterday and had no dizzy spells, you don’t actually have to supervise the whole trip; it’s why the door was open. That way the nurses were able to look inside to check that everything was all right whenever they passed by. 

“Now, do you want to come with me to the bathroom, or are you gonna make yourself comfortable out here?” 

Cougar thought about it for a moment. Apart from that one time when Jensen did a full-body stretch he had been fine on each trip, he’d said repeatedly that he was fine and Cougar had never gotten the impression that the hacker wasn’t telling the truth. As such he probably didn’t need to go along, but on the other hand being cautious had never actually hurt anybody. In the end he inclined his head towards the direction of the bathroom to show that he would accompany Jensen. 

“Alright, come along then mother hen... mother cat? Well if you can call someone a mother bear you can also call them a mother cat. 

"As I said, come along and you can settle on the toilet and watch me return myself to my pristine self.” 

Since Jensen was just passing by him, Cougar took the chance to poke the tech in his ticklish spot. 

“Rude!” exclaimed Jensen as he danced out of Cougar’s reach with a quiet near-squeak. 

He came to a stop by his pack, where he crouched down and started to rummage around. 

Cougar meanwhile went over to the room’s door and closed it, having left it open before because he hadn’t known why the door stood open. 

Jensen joined him in the small hallway with not only his shaving kit but also a fresh set of clothing. 

“Age before beauty,” said Jensen with a slight bow, gesturing for Cougar to enter the bathroom first. 

Knowing that making a fuss, would get him nowhere, even though he wasn’t _that_ much older, he went into the small side room and sat down on the toilet. 

“Would you hold these?” asked the tech and held out his fresh clothes. 

Wordlessly he accepted the bundle and then watched as Jensen unselfconsciously stripped of his t-shirt, dropping it to the ground, opened his kit and started his shaving routine. 

This too was familiar to Cougar, since Jensen shamelessness when it came to physical things meant that he had absolutely no problem with sharing a bathroom even when it wasn’t strictly necessary, and he had therefore seen it done countless times before. 

He sat there content until the shave was finished and it was time for Jensen to change his clothes, which was the signal for him to leave. 

When Jensen emerged, he was fully dressed except for his boots. His t-shirt was a pale blue, which clashed somewhat with the khaki of his trousers, and proclaimed in big writing ‘I tried to be normal once’ and slightly smaller underneath ‘Worst two minutes of my life’. 

At his raised eyebrow, Jensen shrugged and explained, “Well it was supposed to be worn with a pair of jeans, but since I only packed those two colored shirts and I’ve slept in the other one and we’re doing nothing but traveling back and meeting Coleman today, I don’t feel like wearing lifeless and dull clothing. 

“I’ll just pull my jacket over it when we leave, so that Clay doesn’t get a conniption.” 

“Lunch?” 

“Right lunch, which was supposed to be eaten here with all of us attending. How are the chances for something coming up that will prevent both Roque and Clay from missing lunch?” 

Cougar showed him a thumbs down. 

“Yeah, that’s what I’m figuring, too. But I don’t really feel like changing. So what now?” 

Cougar shrugged. 

“Very helpful. Thank you. 

“Well, I’ve got a few hours left before I need to make a decision. 

“So, different question, what are we going to for the next few hours?” 

Cougar once more indicated Jensen’s pack. 

“Could you be any more boring? I mean, I’ll do it, since it needs to be done, but when I’m finished I’m expecting you to make a serious proposal, just so we’re clear,” grumbled Jensen even as he started to stow things away. 

Once Jensen was finished, Cougar asked him to tell him about ‘Future Badassery’ which had the double advantage of giving Jensen more than enough things to talk about to pass the hours and let Cougar know what Jensen was planning and redirect things if absolutely necessary. 

In the end Cougar needed to leave for the mess hall, probably long before Jensen would have run out of things to say about the code and its various possible application and mutations. 

When he and the other three made it to Jensen’s room, the resident was wearing a dark brown t-shirt and shot Cougar a wink when he gave it a pointed look. During lunch they did a sit-rep, that revealed that so far everything was on plan and all that they needed now, was the official go-ahead of Doctor Ewing concerning Jensen’s discharge. Which they received shortly afterwards when she came by with the results of the blood tests they had done since the morning. 

After the by now routine return-trip to the mess hall, Cougar helped Pooch carry down all the gear from their rooms to the front of the barracks he went back to Jensen’s room. 

Unsurprisingly Jensen had put the blue shirt on again and his jacket rested atop of his pack, ready to be put on as soon as they needed to leave. 

Their pick-up happened without any problems and their flight left on time with all Losers and their baggage on board. 

Cougar sitting next to Jensen heaved an internal sigh of relief. They’d made it. The mission was as good as over, they were all fine, if, in Roque’s case, a bit banged up, and for the next few hours there shouldn’t be any problems until they had to face the General. 

Therefore he allowed himself to just lean back and soak up the steady presence of Jensen by his side. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope it turned out well, because the last 6k were written over six days, including today, since I wanted to make use of the window provided by the holidays in order to get it written up, before RL snags me up again.
> 
> The next chapter will be the second Interlude, meaning we'll get to see more of young!Jensen and there will definitely be some answers - provided that I don't need to cut things in pieces again...
> 
> I'll have some free time in march, so I'll try to get it out then. We'll see if I actually manage it...
> 
>  
> 
> Bye^^;;;


End file.
